On the Wings Of Revenge
by Zeida-and-Maria
Summary: Zabuza finds Naruto after Haku, and takes him away. This is half crack nuttyness. Vengeful!Naruto. It's starting to look like a foursome to me but it's not. Just brother love? Gaara, Haku, Naruto and Sasuke... Discontinued
1. E s C a P aD e S

**On the Wings of Revenge**

**By:** Zeida and Maria (Maria)

**Warnings: **Insanity, crack, violence, blood gore, plotholes, randomness, lack of plot to begin with, language etc. etc.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own it.

**Summary:** Poor Naruto, I keep letting him be kidnapped. Zabuza finds Naruto after Haku, and takes him away. This is half crack nuttiness. Vengeful!Naruto. It's starting to look like a foursome to me but it's _not_. Just brother love? Gaara, Haku, Naruto and Sasuke...nuttiness. Shikamaru shows a lot too! Have I proved myself nuts yet?

**ChApTeR OnE: Escapades**

He kept running and running but they wouldn't stop. They wanted to hurt him, to make him mad, sad, but he didn't know why! They always did this; they'd never stop. They all hated him. He didn't even know what he had done.

And then they would ignore him. He wouldn't exist. Just like that. One moment, he was scared that they would accidentally kill him. Not that it would have been an accident. But then they would just stop. He would try and get food, just to find that the person at the shop didn't see him.

Couldn't see him.

Wouldn't see him.

In a way, that was worse. It made him want to do something to make him see him. Make them prove that he wasn't just a figment of his own imagination. That he was really there, that someone knew he was there. That someone cared.

But they didn't.

He was reminded of that every time he got their attention again. Well, maybe his methods weren't exactly endearing, but everything else he tried didn't work. He had tried being loud, faking hurt and screaming. They looked over briefly before laughing nastily and going back about their business.

He had tried doing really good in everything at school. He was at the top of the class, with that black haired Uchiha-boy, but they had muttered something about luck, and again went about their ways. Then it didn't matter if he did well, so he let the grades drop. He didn't really care. If he remembered the stuff, that's all that mattered to him.

So he tried breaking things. He destroyed their stuff, painted it, and stole it. Paraded around, bragging about it. That had gotten their attention.

And that's what he had wanted. Right? Right...

But then they went too far. Or maybe he had gone far. He had snuck into someone's huge estate. It had been a little too easy. His nose told him when ever there was someone coming and his skills and instincts did the rest. He found a lovely, huge and shiny thing right at the center of the huge house. It was a beautiful crystal, inscribed and branded with kanji and seals.

He had taken it, and ran. After exiting the estate, he turned to the guard nearest and yelled, waving the pretty thing at them. The man stared for a second before bellowing and alerting the rest of the household. He had then chased after the young thief. More soon joined him. Even those who they had just passed, they seemed that it was all in the spirit of good fun.

But now there was a mob chasing him and he was only six. He had a lot of stamina for his age, but his legs didn't match. They were gaining. Just a couple more steps. He closed his eyes, knowing what was coming and that he would never get away. There was no way Naruto would escape this alive...

A scream of pure terror and pain echoed through Konoha, before it was cut off suddenly. A tall young man and a small boy looked up from the meal they were finishing off. This trip would be more interesting than expected.

**-:- -:- -:-**

"I hate them, I HATE them!" a small child screamed to the empty air. He stumbled slightly on the rough rock, but continued his bloody ascent up the Hokage monument. He vehemently hoped that they could feel his feet walking all over their faces. Perhaps the blood now dripping down them.

"They deserve it!" he screeched to the night. "How could they protect this horrible place! How come-!" The blond boy sobbed. He slipped at the top of the monument and fell flat on his face.

"How come-?" he hiccup. "They never..." Naruto broke off, staring and the lights marking the village with hatred.

"How come they never protect me..." he whispered. Then howled again.

"YOU AWFUL NO GOOD EVIL PLACE! YOU HORRIBLE, NASTY PEOPLE! WHAT DID I EVER DO TO YOU?! WHAT?! **WHAT**? TELL ME! I SWEAR I WILL DO TEN THOUSAND TIMES **WORSE**!" his tiny voice rising to a peircing pitch.

Far below, a small boy looked up, noticing a tiny dot that wasn't supposed to be on top of a monument.

"Zabuza-sama?"

The tall man next to him looked down, not an emotion visible on his bandaged face. "Hn?"

"There's something up there..." Haku pointed at the dot. His companion looked up. Something like a grin creased the wrapping around his mouth as ghosts of threats reached his ears.

"So there is. Would you like to see who?"

The small brunet at his side looked up and smiled. "That would be nice, Zabuza-sama."

They quickly made their way up to the top of the Yondaime's monument. Near by, a ninja turn in confusion at the gust of wind on this breezeless night.

"They never- hic - never stop... - sob - It wasn't my fault... They would have killed me..." Haku and Zabuza looked at the small child with his knees draw up to his chest and arms clutched around them. It looked as though he was afraid he would disappear. His clothes were torn and shredded.

They were stained with blood. Somehow Zabuza knew it wasn't all his own.

"It was their fault... I didn't mean too... IT WAS THEIR STUPID FAULT!!" The child jumped to his feet and the pair could see a bloody kunai in his hand. The black-haired man raised an invisible eyebrow. What had the child done?

"THEY SHOULDN'T BE ALIVE IN THE FIRST PLACE! THEY DON'T DESERVE IT!!

"I didn't mean too..." The child started sobbing and Haku rushed forward and pulled him into a protective embrace. Zabuza looked on approvingly, although he wouldn't have minded some permission asking first. Haku would take care of this part, while he could leave quickly and find out just what the little kid could have done. He vanished.

Far below, a ninja rubbed his head. He could have sworn that the Yondaime's head had been smoking. Earlier he was sure he had heard it swearing to. Sighing, the man looked back down at his bottle. Damn, he had drunk a lot.

"It's okay... Don't worry..." Haku soothed the startled boy. Naruto looked up in confusion at this person. What was he doing? It felt nice.

There was a person touching him, and it didn't hurt...? How odd.

The strange boy just continued to pet him and whisper in that kind voice that seemed just for him. The blond child felt himself relax in the weird grip. Suddenly he stared sobbing and wailing, clutching Haku as though there was nothing solid left. The black haired child held him tighter and brought them down so they were seated on the monument. Rather, Naruto was seated and Haku was kneeing over, hugging him.

"Tell me what's wrong... I can try and fix it..." Haku coaxed after the little boy had calmed down.

The boy hiccuped and looked up at him with wide watery eyes. "W-what are you doing...?" he asked. He still clung to the other, but without the earlier risk of tearing clothing.

Haku looked at the blond with a slight, confused frown. "What do you mean?"

"With your arms around me. It doesn't hurt, what is it?"

The black-eyed boy felt sudden rage well up inside of him. He took deep calming breaths and refused to let it show on his face and scare the blond child. Blue eyes blinked up at in confusion over the silence.

"It's a hug. It never hurts and it's supposed to make you feel happy." How could anyone treat a child so bad that he didn't know what a hug was?! How could they?

Even he knew what a hug was...

The little blond looked up at Haku and smiled. The ice nin decided right there that he liked that smile and wanted to see it often. Now, how to do that?

"What's your name? I am Haku."

"I'm Naruto!" snuggled into his new... what was he...? Well he snuggled into his 'hug'. Hugs felt nice.

"Why were you so upset. No, don't be sad! You did nothing wrong!"

Naruto sniffled. "R-really?"

Haku nodded firmly, and settled on the ground. Zabuza-sama would be back soon and he wanted to have a good reason to bring the endearing little boy with them.

"I... um... They chased me and attacked me - they always attack me...- and all I wanted was them to look at me!" the black haired boy rubbed his back encouragingly when he paused.

"And they hurt real bad and I wanted it to stop... Is that wrong...?"

"Never." Not for you or Zabuza-sama. You can do what ever you want, as long as you're happy. And it won't bother Zabuza-sama.

Naruto smiled and rested his head on Haku's chest. The child nin found himself supporting both his own weight and that of the slightly old boy's. It wasn't all that uncomfortable.

"I wanted it to stop so I grabbed the kunai -that's this, it's a knife- and stabbed them... They started screaming and yelling even more. But they didn't stop hurting me!" the six year old looked at Haku pleadingly. Surely this nice person would understand his reasons. When they did that sort of thing, when the villagers and the ninja did that sort of thing, then everyone stopped bothering them. He figure that it should work for him too. "They kept attacking so I slashed them again and the red stuff that's in everyone came out and the person fell down and he didn't get up again!" Tears were in his eyes again but after Naruto yawned, Haku figured it was sleepiness. The little blond didn't look sad enough to be crying.

Good.

"They stopped attacking a bit, and stared at the person, then they yelled at me and slashed at me, but I don't like the red stuff coming from me, so I ran away and stabbed them 'gain." Haku nodded at his logic and he yawned again.

"Another person fell down after I stabbed them -If you get their neck or chest, they won't attack anymore! - So the people stopped again but they started again!" Naruto huffed and pouted disapprovingly. "So I made all of them stop attacking me. But then they weren't moving and I remember Sensei at school saying once that when we were ninja and older that if we got slashed and stopped moving, it was really bad... Am I bad? 'Cause I made them stop?"

His wonderful, nice black haired companion smiled at him. "I agree with you, they deserve it. You aren't bad."

Haku smiled and gently poked Nature's nose, like his mother used to... before... and his eyes went crossed! The child nin giggled and his blond companion smiled. He yawned again and snuggled even closer to Haku, if that was possible. His eyes flickered closed and his breathing steadied.

Zabuza appeared then, silently and unnoticed by any save the small black haired boy.

"Hello, Zabuza-sama. Did you find what you wanted to know?" The man nodded and stepped closer to the pair.

"Yes. Did he say anything?"

"I'm not sure. I think he killed a whole bunch of people who were trying to kill him."

The adult nin nodded. "Almost, and I took out the rest who were just injured. He was almost about as good as you."

Haku smiled sweetly at the older man. "Yes. Zabuza-sama? He can't stay here. They will kill him."

"I cleaned up his little mess."

"But they always treat him like this! He _said _that they always do!"

Zabuza smiled through the mask. "I never said I wouldn't take him."

Haku gave such a dazzling happy grin, as the missing nin was sure he had never seen. He would have to try and find out what got that kind of reaction out of his charge.

The tall nin leaned down and lifted the now sleeping blond into his arms. Haku quickly stands again as Zabuza woke Naruto.

"His name is Naruto." his apprentice informed.

"I wormed that out of his victims... one of the living ones."

Haku nodded happily.

The blond boy looked up in confusion at the new man holding him. "Who are you...?" he mumbled sleepily.

"Where do you live. Describe it. You're getting your belongings. I'm taking you with me."

Zabuza could see cogs turning as the child absorbed this.

"I- what?"

"Tell me where you live." the nuke-nin repeated, enunciating each syllable.

Naruto clambered in the inn's arms, climbing over his shoulder and pointing. "Over there, Oniisan!" (In the 'mister' fashion) His finger targeted a tall, half-collapsed apartment building, almost on the other side of the village.

Zabuza frowned at the state of the place, but resettled the child to perform the transportation jutsu.

"Wait, oniisan! You're taking me away...?"

The nin froze, the jutsu half finish. "You don't want to go?" he asked.

"I want to! I want to! It's just that I don't want nothing from here! I don't want my stuff..."

The man raised an invisible eyebrow. This was... interesting. "Fine by me. In fact I will get you fresh clothes and you may burn those." As well as teach you proper language skills.

The child, Naruto, looked up at him with a smile almost a beautiful as Haku's. My, how could he have missed something like this, especially when it seemed so easy to get? "Really, oniisan?!"

The black haired man nodded. "Don't call me 'oniisan' I'm Zabuza."

"Zabuza-sama." Haku insisted. Naruto beamed down at him.

"Zabuza-sama." He agreed.

The older nin just completed his jutsu and transported them to the gate. They left under another jutsu, disguising them from ANBU eyes.

It was for the ANBU's own good, really.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**EDITED**

A/N: Another C/r/a/c/k story from your favorite nutcase! Yes I know I shouldn't be writing this when I have so many other things to do, but it's my funeral, not yours, isn't it!

REVIEWS ARE MY ANTI-DRUG!

Lurve you all,

**.E ..E ..E ..E .** Kakki/Maria/Queen of the MEEP. **. 3.. 3.. 3.. 3**


	2. T h E b L o O d I n Y o U r V e I n S

**On the Wings of Revenge**

**By:** Zeida and Maria (Maria)

**Warnings: **Insanity, crack, violence, blood gore, plotholes, randomness, lack of plot to begin with, language etc... etc...

**Disclaimer:** I don't own it.

**Summary:** Poor Naruto, I keep letting him be kidnapped. Zabuza finds Naruto after Haku, and takes him away. This is half crack nuttiness. Vengeful!Naruto. It's starting to look like a foursome to me but it's _not_. Just brother love? Gaara, Haku, Naruto and Sasuke...nuttiness. Shikamaru shows a lot too! Have I proved myself nuts yet? Inspired by my own nutty-ness.

**ChApTeR tWo: The Blood in Your Veins**

Naruto woke at 6:00 again. He did his eighty sit-ups and push-ups before heading down to breakfast. Zabuza-sama was out again. Another assassination, the blond guessed. When would he get a chance to see one? Haku was already waiting at the table, he always got up a little earlier to plan out the day. Naruto tried once to get up before him, but it seemed to go against the laws of physics. The blond could stay up all night and Haku would be up before him.

At the older boy's entrance, Haku looked up, smiling at the boy in all his nice new clothes that Zabuza-sama had gotten him. There was not a hint of orange on him, as Naruto explained that he hated the color, but it was the only color that they would let him buy. He wore now a sleeveless tight hoodie with a zipper running up the front. The hood was to hide his noticeable hair, and the fabric was camouflage patterned with various shades of blue, to suit the water orientated country. He sported a thin black belt around his waist to support any weapons that the pouch tied to his right leg with white bandages couldn't hold. His pants were a dark blue that mimicked the color of deep waters. He had the normal dark-blue shinobi sandals, regulation Mist output, and his hands were wrapped in white bandages as -to his dimay- the blond healed too fast and callouses didn't form. The peppy, and hungry blond plopped lightly into his seat.

"Itadakimasu!" The happy voice cheered, along with his black-haired companion's more dignified expression of gratitude.

They ate the meal in silence, but Naruto started asking Haku questions about the day while they were clearing up the table. The blond nin washed the dishes carefully and set them on the counter for Haku to dry once he finished wiping down the table. Afterwards, Naruto pulled out a stool to reach the higher cabinets for when he put the then dry dishes.

"What are you going to teach me today?" he questioned.

"Hmm... I think we will just go over Chakra control." the ice-nin decided.

"Aw... I wanna do something new today." the blue eyes whined a reply.

Haku bopped the slightly older boy on the head. "First lesson, don't whine."

Naruto nodded, cowed. This happened every time the blond whined, complained, or killed the English language. Zabuza once witnessed this and was forcefully reminded of passing the Hyuuga household in Konoha. There was a man ranting to a group of young Hyuuga children about how Hyuuga's do this or that and never do this or this or that... Disturbing...Although he was grateful for the improvement in the boy's speech.

"Next, I will quiz you on Chakra forms. If you do it perfectly, I will teach you something new that Zabuza-sama was showing me."

Bright blue eyes lit up and the day was planned. It always went like that, for the whole six months that Naruto had been in Zabuza's care. Haku has been with him for a whole year before they had rescued the other abused boy, and so Haku knew a lot more than Naruto. Zabuza decided that he didn't want to repeat his lessons, so the black haired child was saddled with teaching his new friend everything he knew while Zabuza taught him. Basically, Zabuza taught Haku who taught Naruto. No one minded.

The small ice-nin quickly came up with a plan of action as soon as Zabuza had told him that he would be teaching Naruto. He gave Naruto a sheet with everything that was to be done in the morning before he came to breakfast. It took a couple tries before the blond could come down in time to have a warm meal. The first time he hadn't gotten down until lunch and Haku had reprimanded him about sleeping in. That was about the time when got a new alarm clock.

Every morning he would do one push-up or sit-up more than he had done two days ago. Then he would go down to breakfast, eat as much as he could, bug Haku, and settle on a schedule for the day. Then they would go down to the gym, and stretch for an hour along with a couple warm ups. Haku would find a book with that day's class, and start explaining things to Naruto, while he asked question after question to make sure he got it. Some days they would find a question that neither knew the answer to, and write it down to show Zabuza-sama when he returned.

Zabuza was almost always impressed by the strange little questions that you would over-look normally. Normal ninja just didn't notice that kind of thing, despite their 'underneath the underneath' motto.

After Haku reviewed Chakra, he quizzed Naruto on it, waiting for the boy to get another perfect score. The blond would ace the quiz, or take it over until he did, and the ice-nin would pull out a book on whatever they wanted to see This time it was Human Anatomy. They studied it together, as this was something that Haku was still learning as well.

Zabuza would usually be back from his mission by noon, and head down to the gym to give them both weapons training. After two hours of aim, and handling practice, he would bring them to a secluded clearing to learn and practice ninjutsu. Naruto was always off to the side, trying to control the Kyuubi's chakra. Zabuza would give him small jutsu to practice, but nothing big until the child wouldn't lose control of the power that went into it. Naruto was very close to getting this.

Closer than Zabuza would have expected this soon. Motivation, and knowledge was a wonderful thing. The nuke-nin had lost most of his respect for the village of Konoha when he found out that the boy didn't know of the power that he possessed. If they had actually taught him...

After they were tired to the bone, the missing nin would let them go in for lunch. Naruto and Haku had learned fast that it was best to prepare the meal before hand. Again they would eat, but not in silence. Naruto would ask Zabuza all about the mission and tell him about what they had done and his progress with the nine-tails. Zabuza constantly wondered when he got a chance to breath between talking and eating and pondered why the "lack of air" didn't seem to affect him.

Of course there was a technique to be able to do that, it relied on burning one's chakra as air. Any Mist nin should know it, but he hadn't quite gotten around to teaching it to his students yet. It shall remain a mystery.

They would soon finish their meal and Zabuza would take up teaching again, quizzing the two boys on jutsus and the names of weapons. Their basic make up, and the best, or fasted way to defend against them. He would correct them and order them to look up extra on every weapon, or jutsu they messed up, to be presented to him the next day. This always took longer than one would expect and when the were done, it was time for dinner. Zabuza would make them watch him cook over stove so they could take care of it themselves if he was away on a long mission. (1) Haku and Naruto would retire to their room, doing the extra work, and stretching so they would not be too sore the next day. They always slept well, out like a very old light.

-:- -:- -:-

Today, however, Zabuza was still with them when Haku came down the next morning. Immediately the young boy was sent back up to get Naruto.

The two boys stood in front of their sensei and bowed to greet him before seating themselves and eating the breakfast Zabuza prepared. They looked at him questioningly, Zabuza was rarely home in the mornings. He gave them something that translated to a smile through his mask. Uh-oh.

"Today, you will accompany me on a mission. We are going to Sunagakure no sato in Kaze no kuni. As it will be the first time you will have been there, I want you to try and learn the layout of the village while we are there. That will be your lesson for today."

Naruto frowned at this, "Zabuza-sama, do you need the information? Or is this just teaching us to do this?"

"I do not need the information, but don't shirk. If you do not have a good idea of the structure of the village and two escape routes, you two will be doing nothing but strength and endurance exercises for the next week. And then all the work you missed to be made up."

Haku and Naruto nodded hastily to their sensei.

-:- -:- -:-

Haku and Naruto looked at the village curiously. It was about the same size as the Mist, according to Zabuza-sama, but a different layout. On the train there, the older nin had let them plan out how they were going to figure out the Sand village. He even gave a few comments and criticisms to help them. When they arrived, he bid them good luck and vanished. Somewhere, a ninja randomly remembered the smoking of a certain Hokage head.

Now the two apprentice nin were alone.

"What do we do...?" Naruto asked, looking at the foreign city in awe.

"We do as we planned" Haku answered, keeping his cool. The younger boy drew out two long pieces of chalk and handed one to the blond. He took it and nodded in a resolute way that Haku found adorable.

"Okay! I'll go that way and you go that way!" Naruto decided, pointing out the two routes.

The blond and brunette took off, heading in the separate directions. the would meet up in the middle, hopefully, at a park they heard passer-bys talking about. Until then, it was Naruto's job to find at least one exit and memorize as much of he place as possible. He kept to the shadows, taking note of the Kazekage tower and numerous businesses along the way, every time he went down a split path, he mark, with the chalk, where he came from and where he entered. Twice he came by a place that was already marked by chalk, meaning that Haku had been there and he didn't need to worry about it. Soon, he came upon the meeting place.

Naruto crept slowly closer to the park, looking around for anything threatening. To the left a shadow twitched. A small white hand appearing out of the darkness and signaled silently to the blond. The little nin nodded his head in response and turned to look at the park. There was a small boy, around their age, clutching a worn teddy to his chest. Naruto walked up to him, skirting around an out-of-place bloody ball. Killing intent rose from the redhead and he neared, sand lifting itself from the ground to swirl around the lonely figure. Suddenly the ball didn't seem so out of place. The boy turned to face Naruto, and his blue eyes widened in surprise. Dark rings circled bright green eyes, red hair flopped carelessly everywhere and above his left eye was a scar, 'Ai'.

'Love'.

Haku came out of his hiding place, and stands behind the boy, opposite Naruto. The child spun, glaring at the new visitor. "You can't kill me! I've already killed all the other people who tried!" he yelled, his voice young and high pitched. The ice nin raised an eyebrow, smiling sweetly, about to speak but Naruto cuts him off.

"He's like me, Haku-kun, can I keep him?! Pleeeeeeaaaase?!" The redhead spun again, staring at the blond, confused. Haku giggles, but the green-eyed child turns to him again, suspicious.

"You won't trick... me...?" He paused at the pair of hands taking his own and bouncing up and down.

"He'll come with us! He'll come with us! And he lives here, so he knows the exits! And he's like meeeeee!" the blue-eyed boy sang, dancing around with his confused and slightly unwilling partner.

"But you're gonna try and kill me..."

Haku giggled again, "Why would we want to do that?"

The child blinked at him, hands still captured. Naruto grinned at the boy, "Yeah! You're like me! Do you know that?"

The red head shook his head, green eyes looking at Haku and Naruto in confusion. Why didn't they attack him yet...? Or maybe this was an attack... Some sort of new killing style his father was trying out...

"Well, your village wants to kill you for a creature and decision you had no choice in."

No... not an attack... His father couldn't possibly be this smart.

Haku nodded happily at his charge's insight. "What's your name?"

The lonely boy looks up at him, sniffing. "G-Gaara." he hiccups. He looked at the two people being so nice to him as his vision starts to blur. Haku and Naruto balk at the tears running down Gaara's face.

"Nononononono! Don't cry, it's okay! We'll take you with us and you'll be nice and happy!" Naruto exclaims, enveloping the smaller boy in a hug. The ice nin follows suit and murmurs his own comforts to the child in their arms. He begins to bawl, clutching at them like lifelines. All his years of loneliness, and exile and terror of his power coming out in that salty liquid. The hole in his heart, wishing secretly for love from someone, even as his mind rejected it, filled slowly at their touch. He was far from healed, but it was a start.

The tears were just starting to subside as another presence entered the clearing. He raised a non-existent eyebrow at the sight of the three boys huddled together. That's the Shukaku boy in the middle, wasn't it. He thought to himself, he really wouldn't be surprised. The missing-nin walked up to them, crouching down to their eye-level.

"I take it that this means that you have completed your training exercise?"

Haku looked up at the familiar voice and smiled. He carefully extracted himself from the limbs of the other two, and bowed happily to Zabuza. "Yes, Zabuza-sama, though it ended a little... different than we imagined."

Naruto, noticing his sensei, hopped up as well. "Yeah, Gaara-chan told us all of the exits, and even a couple secret entrances, can we keep him Zabuza-sama?!" the blond began bouncing again, dragging Gaara ...again.

Zabuza looked down at them. He knew it. How do they do it? His first visit to Konaha and Haku gets Naruto. Their first visit to Suna and they snag Sabaku no Gaara. Speaking of Konoha, he really had to pay them a 'visit' about the poor blond not knowing how to read...

Argh! He was getting protective! Super powerful A-class missing ninja didn't get protective! They just didn't!

The black-haired nin re-directed his attention back to his apprentices. He must have been making an angry face because Naruto was on the verge of tears, Gaara was full out crying again and Haku was giving him that look.

"Pleeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaase?!" Naruto begged, "He's like me..."

The missing nin frowned He was going soft, he knew it.

On the other hand two demons and a kekkei genkai...? And that puppy-dog look was starting to hurt his head. Must be some sort of secret mind control technique that the boys accidentally came up with. Like those smiles. "I never said I wouldn't take him." he said, unknowingly mimicking his answer to Haku, those months ago.

The poor unprepared missing nin took a step back at the blindingly happy smiles and two bodies that suddenly latched onto him. He groaned, pulling them off. "You're teaching him." the man stated.

"THANK YOU, ZABUZA-SAMA!!!"

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(1) I just imagined Zabuza in a pink frilly apron... 0o;

A/N: Alright, before anything else: I LOVE MY REVIEWERS! You are just so dang SWEEEET!. I'm sorry this was late, I kind died after being 'tortured' by a herd of chibi-monkeys. THEY'RE VICIOUS I TELL YOU!

Anyway, school is coming up soon, just to warn you. I really don't know if that will make updates faster or slower...

**wstphl** Thank you very much! ((gives you a Gaara-and-his-teddy plushie for being sweet))

**DragonLady of Nerkila** ((promptly faints)) Um... THANK YOU!!! ((dies, revives and gives you a puppy-dog-eyes-Haku-and-dancing-Naru-chan plushie))

**Belletiger** Here ya go! ((Gives you an adorible-concentrating-Naru-chan plushie))

**The Lye:** THANK YOU! You are too sweet! ((Dances and gives you a Zabuza-pondering-the-super-smiley-no-jutsu-and-the-puppy-dog-eyes-no-jutsu plushie))

Reviews are my anti-_depressant _today!

Forever adoring of her reviewers

**.E ..E ..E ..E .** Kakki/Maria/Queen of the MEEP. **. 3.. 3.. 3.. 3.**


	3. P l A n S f O r T h E f U t U r E

**On the Wings of Revenge**

**By:** Zeida and Maria (Maria)

**Warnings: **Insanity, crack, violence, blood gore, plotholes, randomness, lack of plot to begin with, language ect... ect...

**Disclaimer:** I don't own it.

**Summary:** Poor Naruto, I keep letting him be kidnapped. Zabuza finds Naruto after Haku, and takes him away. This is half crack nuttyness. Vengeful!Naruto. It's starting to look like a foursome to me but it's _not_. Just brother love? Gaara, Haku, Naruto and Sasuke...nuttiness. Shikamaru shows a lot too! Have I proved myself nuts yet? Inspired by my own nutty-ness.

ChApTeR tHrEe: Plans for the Future

Sakura twitched as Tazuna let out another loud complaint. "Jus' what can a buncha kids do anyway?! Even with two men, they'll get in the way!" Kakashi ignored the man, favoring his... 'literature' instead. Asuma sighed and began to explain how they were officially adults when they got their hitai-ate. Shikamaru just sighed. Ino chattered endlessly to Sasuke, who's eye seemed to have developed a steady twitch. Sadly Ino was on the wrong side to notice this. Chouji ignored all but his chip bag, his favorite brand too.

"Hmmm..." The silver-haired nin's one visible eye trailed a passing puddle for a moment. Funny, he didn't remember any rain.

Suddenly, all hell broke loose as two heavily clothed masked men appeared out of nowhere. They lunged at the jounin, a chain stretching between the missing-nin as it wrapped around the two. Shikamaru wasted no time, pulling his best friends, Chouji and Sasuke, over to him and told them what to do. In another moment they were gone and their sensei were nothing but a pile of bloody... logs? Ino stopped shrieking for a second as the situation hit her. The pink haired kunoichi behind her leapt into action as well, landing in front of Tazuna. Ino flipped behind him to have their job cover at both sides. They both pulled out kunai, and prepared themselves for a fight.

A barrage of kunai flew out of eight different places. Some were illusionary, but the demon brothers had to dodge or block them all, as they didn't know which. A shadow crept out of nowhere, absorbing and stretching towards the pair with the help of the near-by shadows. The nuke-nin didn't notice until too late when they suddenly couldn't dodge the kunai. Several hit them making superficial cuts.

Then, all movement stopped as a frightening rumbling erupted from the closest batch of trees. A huge, fast rolling form erupted, startling nearly everyone in the clearing.

Chouji's meat tank.

"Oh, dear Kami-sama..." the smaller of the two grimaced, squeezing his eyes shut. Neither noticed Sasuke snuck up behind them to touch them at that delicate little pressure point on their necks. Rather, whacked the spot brutally.

Not that they could have stopped him.

They fainted, still standing from the kage no jutsu. Chouji slowed and shrunk rapidly, stopping right in front of the pair. He and the last-Uchiha-that-mattered made quick work of their weapons, making them painfully vulnerable to the two jounin that chose right then to reappear.

"Amazing work, all of you." Kakashi complimented. Asuma glared at him and muttered something about 'the damn peppy perv' owing him a lot of cash.

Ino and Sakura looked down at the compliment. "We didn't do anything!" The Yamanaka muttered.

"Yeah, it was all them..." Sakura agreed.

"Not that Sasuke-kun wasn't totally awesome!"

Said broody teen rolled his eyes, sharing a look with Shikamaru. Chouji happily recharged on chips. Hey, it was hard to control a meat tank!

"Yeah! He was amazing..." they sighed dreamily.

"You think it registers with them that they only saw me when I poked the two?" Sasuke leaned and whispered conspiratorially to the lazy genius. The Nara snorted and shook his head.

"Hold on girls, don't go into a tirade just yet." Kakashi held his hands up as though warding the rant away. The girls glared at him. "You have to understand that, although Sasuke, and Shikamaru and Chouji, incapacitated the ninja," Both jounin gave a pointed look at Tazuna, who looked down guiltily. "That was only half the job. You two took care of the last part flawlessly. Asuma and I didn't have to lift a finger!"

Asuma rolled his eyes, then addressing the bridge builder. "Speaking of which, why did we face ninja, missing nin, no less!"

The old man sighed, leading them down the path. The missing nin were bound heavily to a tree and still KOed, waiting for any nearby hunters. They were ten minutes or so down the path before the bridge builder began to speak.

"It turns out that a super dangerous man is after my life..."

"'Super dangerous man'? Who?" Asuma asked, sticking a new cancer stick in his mouth and chewing on it, as well as pondered the man's choice of words.

"You've probably at least heard of his name. The wealthy shipping magnate... A man named Gatou."

Kakashi looked up from his book, "Hmm? Gatou? From the Gatou's Shipping and Transport Company? (3) He's said to be one of the worlds few really wealthy people."

"Yes officially..." they continued walking again, at a faster pace in the unsafe lands. "But he secretly sells drugs and other illegal items and uses ninja and gang members to take over businesses and countries. He is a very nasty man.

"It was about a year ago when he set his eyes on Wave Country. Through money and violence he quickly took control of the country's shipping industry. Gatou now has a monopoly on all businesses in Wave. The only thing he has left to fear now is the completion of the bridge."

Sakura frowned, mulling it over. "I see... And since you're building the bridge, you're in the way." Tazuna nodded.

"So... those ninja..." Sasuke began,

"...were hired by Gatou?" Shikamaru finished. Again the older man nodded, sighing forlornly.

Kakashi frown from under his mask, "What I don't understand is if you knew there were ninja after you, why did you hide that fact when you hired us?"

"...The Wave Country is very poor, even the feudal lord has no money.

Of course we didn't have much either, Defiantly not enough for the expensive B-rank mission." The old man looked down, shooting a quick, calculating glance at the shinobi around him. "Well, if you quit the mission now, I will surely die some horrible, painful death by ninja...but- Don't worried about it!" He crowed, spinning around in a slightly drunk fashion. "My cute ten year old grandson will just cry about it a few days!

Oh! And my beautiful daughter will live a sad life, hating Leaf ninja for the rest of her days!" He grinned at them.

Shikamaru, Chouji and Sasuke blinked owlishly at him. Ino was glaring at him while Sakura sweatdroped. Asuma nursed a face plant (Damn! His cigarette went out!) and his silver haired companion scratched the back of his head sheepishly.

"Well..." the copycat nin said, "I guess we have no choice. We'll protect you at least until you get back to your country."

'Heh heh heh... I win...' the bridge builder snickered to himself. (1)

Silent since agreeing to take the mission, the group soon neared a huge lake. On the shore was a nervous looking man, with a large hat covering most of his face, in a boat. Tazuna had a quick conversation with the man, slipping money out of his pocket and thanking him. He soon motioned for the large group to come over.

"Okay," the bridge builder whispered, "Here's the plan. One group of you will go with me on this boat, and five minutes later, the second group will leave, using that one." he gestured, pointing to a hidden spot not far away. The shinobi nodded, breaking into two groups. They didn't go by the genin selection, but rather who they worked best with. This was too dangerous a job to not know your allies. Sasuke, Chouji and Shikamaru left first, with Kakashi, much to Ino and Sakura's disappointment. "But we could work very well with Sasuke-kun!"

Said broody boy winced.

Soon both teams were at the other side of the lake with no incident. "Tazuna... This is as far as we go. Good bye, and

**Good luck**."

Tazuna nodded, thoroughly thanking the man as he left.

"Alright! Get me home safe!"

Kakashi and Asuma nodded tiredly, "Hai, hai."

They walked in silence for a bit longer, coming upon another body of water. The jounin looked around warily as mist seemed to seep in from nowhere. The genin kept walking, quite comfortably and, to their later embarrassment, obliviously at ease.

"Duck!" Kakashi suddenly yelled, grabbing the nearest of the students and dragging them down with him. Further back, Asuma did the same with Tazuna. A blur passed over, splitting the wind and embedding deeply in the tree behind them. The group looked up, locating the tall, frightening man standing on the handle of his own huge sword, the Head Cleaver.

Quickly snapping into action, most of the genin surrounded Tazuna, followed quickly by the slower ones. The jounin stood between them and the missing nin making it clear that they were his opponents.

The fight was on.

-:- -:- -:-

Gaara twitched from a tree, watching as Kakashi and Asuma faced down Zabuza. They were told to stay out of the way, but it was awful hard. There where seven people down there against one- er wait now ten- Zabuza-sama...s?

The red-head shook himself out of his runaway thoughts. He shouldn't have spent the night playing war with Naruto and Haku. But it was hardly their fault that they had that freaky septuple war... thing...

Haku ran out of cards.

Anyway, Zabuza-sama was out numbered and it was unfair. Not that he cared what was fair except when his sensei was concerned. But his sensei was concerned, and therefore, it was unfair.

A small, light form landed beside him, leaning against the trunk. Naruto looked up at the contemplating male. "You think we should help out?" he asked. Another boy appeared out of nowhere, standing comfortably on the other side of Gaara.

"No, we will rescue him if he is in danger. For now we should watch how one wins against odds." Haku yawned and pouted at his brothers, as though it was solely their fault that the card game had gone awry.

Which is wasn't.

"We should also split up before someone noticed the concentration of chakra."

Naruto nodded and all three vanish to find a new position, just as a pair of curious blue eyes look at the branch they had just left. Miles away, a drunk ninja just remembered that shinobi leave a trail of clouds when they teleport to a new location.

Back on the battle field, things were starting to heat up. Kakashi realized that he had underestimated the missing nin, even with a partner to fight with him. Signaling Asuma, he started to lift the mask away from his eye. The smoking nin carefully kept Zabuza occupied while the silver haired jounin could assess the situation with the Sharingan and come up with a nice plan. Preferably one that included them winning, and Zabuza losing.

Zabuza made repeated attempts to get at Kakashi, knowing he was going to start having trouble if the Sharingan came out. Suddenly changing tactics, he lunged away from the copy nin, deciding to try and end the job quickly instead. The pink haired kunoichi shrieked when his course became apparent. The two teachers immediately leapt in the way, effectively distracting him. Kakashi winced and grabbed his arm where his latest slash started the spurt blood, Asuma quickly grabbed the bandages holding his now empty kunai pouch to his leg, and wrapped his hand tightly. The genin made a tighter knit circle around Tazuna, defending against the multiple water clones now appearing around them.

Zabuza suddenly found himself with a face full of empty cloth. Frowning and growling, the man lunged back into the fight. Despite his traitorous thoughts, this battle was splendid.

The ex-Mist nin was finding, much to his distaste, that it was indeed much harder to fight two jounin and a Sharingan eye. He was getting pushed back away from his job much to fast and it was getting steadily harder to control the clones. The stupid things were getting themselves killed too easily!

The kids must be a bit better than they look. But only slightly.

Zabuza dodged a hook to his right, but fell into a sudden trap by the silver haired nin. He flew bodily across the ground, stopping just before a slight cliff drop into the water. The bandaged man was finding it difficult to get up again.

Three flashes appeared out of know where, darting to the trees nearby the fallen nin. Projectiles shot away from them, landing warningly near the two jounin who had made to finish the job.

Shikamaru frowned as the three figures stood in front of Zabuza. That blond one looked... familiar. He had never forgotten a face. Not that he would know if he had, because he would have forgotten. But that was a an annoying thought to ponder some other day. (Perhaps he could create a memory recovery jutsu?) He looked up at his exhausted sensei. Both of them were staring at the blond boy too. How troublesome. And strange.

Sasuke walked up behind Shikamaru and whispered in his ear, out of hearing range of their teachers. "Do we know that kid? The blond one? I recognize him but I'm not sure where from."

The lazy genius looked at his friend through peripheral vision, not turning away from the new adversaries. "I do, too, and our sensei have yet to pick up their jaws."

Just then Kakashi drew everyone's attention. "Na-Naruto!" he squawked.

The blond started and stared at the silver haired jounin. The other two boys bounced in front of him, obviously confused that someone knew him. Kakashi straightened, despite his injuries, tugging on Asuma's arm and forcing them both back. "I propose a temporary truce. Take you teammate and leave, we will not stop you."

Gaara frowned at them, they could take out that team. But their sensei came first. He and Naruto stood guard as Haku picked up their wounded teacher. Haku and Zabuza disappeared in a twister of smoke and misty water leaving no trace behind. Glaring at the Konoha group one last time, Gaara summoned a storm of sand and whisked himself and Naruto away, to join the rest of their team.

Kakashi promptly fell over into Asuma. The black haired jounin groaned at his misfortune but lifted him onto his back. "C'mon, Tazuna lead us to your house." he ordered. (2)

-:- -:- -:-

As they arrived at a small, run-down looking house a tall lady rushed out to greet them, ushering them inside and setting up a futon (4) for Kakashi. Sakura then turned to the remaining sensei, questioning him on their strange behavior around the newcomers.

Asuma sighed. "Sit down." he ordered. The students settled around him in a rough circle. The smoking nin started rubbing his head in an irritated fashion. "Did you see that blond boy?" They nodded, confused. "Did any of you feel that he was familiar?- Shikamaru, Sasuke, and Ino?- Good. That boy was you classmate once.-"

"WHAT?!'' Sakura exclaimed, "But- when?" Asuma looked at her oddly as he thought he saw another Sakura in the girls eyes, rampaging. Shaking his head, the man continued.

"I'm surprised any of you remember him, you had all just started in the academy when he ran away. The ANBU went looking for him for a couple weeks before giving up." He's now on the list for the Hunter-nin, the older man thought. But it would be better not to tell them it had happened so soon.

Sasuke frowned. Why send ANBU after a little kid, and why couldn't they catch him? "Why did he run away? If we had just started school, then he was six or so. Why would he run away?" the moody boy looked at the older nin suspiciously. Something was not right about this.

Asuma sighed again. "I'm afraid it's against the law to talk about that. Let's just say that the villagers treated him very badly and more likely than not, he got fed up. Although now that Zabuza has shown up with him, things change a little." For the worse.

Chouji spoke up, looking up from his abnormally quiet chip bag. "Why? Zabuza's strong, but you make it sound really bad."

"Do any of you know about Zabuza of the Hidden Mist Village, or rather that Village Hidden in the Bloody Mist?"

Anticipating a story, the (nearly departed) child-like part of the genin pushed them unconsciously closer to the teacher. Asuma told them of the Demon of the Mist. All about the bloody and terrible genin exam. How he had slaughtered all the other students. How he had felt no regrets.

How he was only a child during all of that.

By the end of the story, Ino and Sakura were subconsciously clutching at each other and even Sasuke was a little freaked out, letting himself slip a bit closer to Shikamaru and Chouji. Chouji's bag lay forgotten at his side. For once, he didn't feel like eating. Shikamaru was frowning, his brow creased in thought.

"Why are they so loyal to a demon?"

Asuma looked up at the genius. Maybe because they are demons themselves... he thought. "I really can't say..." he muttered.

To most, it almost sounded as if he didn't know himself.

-:- Owari -:-

**(1) **I realize that conversation was awkward. I took it straight from the manga... sorry... yeah...

**(2)** Take us to your Mastah!

(3) Thank you, ScathingSarcasm! Your corrections are well appreciated! Tell me (ANYONE) if there are anymore blaring errors.

(4) For reasons unknown I almost typed coffin... Really, Kakashi's coffin? He's not _that _bad off. D

A/N: I was gonna make this longer, but it was getting longer already. I didn't want . But what do you think? I didn't mean to make Asuma-chan so nasty, he gets nicer later. He has to. I wuvvles him too much.

I also made Sasuke and Shika and Chouji good friends. It is not a plothole! It's... just not gonna be delved into...

Heehee...

Actually, i could make a side story of their early years, if mine reviewers say Yesh!

Next Chapter: Training, Accidental Info gathering, that leads to a self-inflicted mission in which they don't get there in time! Also, a bit of reminiscing from Zabuza-sama and maybe a few others.

**TenWings**: Here ya go! Btw, I like _comments _with my commands XD

**hanyou-samurai **How so? The only bits that could be OOc are thoughts and you don't see his thoughts in the manga. Nice question tho! And just wait till you see what happens to Gaara because _he _was found! Gives you An Actually-a-mini-preview to-the-next-chapter-Haku-chaseing-Gaara-and-Naruto-because-they-stole-his-clothes-plushie

**BattleStations **Aww! Thank you! I didn't see it either! That's why I did it! Just like that neji become half demon idea I had... But lets not get into that! Heeheehee... Gives you a Sleepy-Haku-leaning-on Naruto's-shoulder-while-Gaara-curls-up-in-his-lap-plushie.

**belletiger: **0o. That. Is. An. Awsome. Idea... glomp! Here! "Gives you a Naruto's-prototype-super-smile-no-jutsu-on-Gaara-plushie" XD

**The Lye **Oh hell yeah... Just Wait till the chuunin exam! Chaos is Fun! Next chapter is gonna be... interesting... It's when Sasu-chan leaves... rather forcfully... you'll see. Shika is Awsome! Give you a Haku-puppy-dog-eye-plushie to accompany your Zabuza

TT.TT I like reviews... **Reviews are my Anti-pick-at-bug-bites this time!**

Love you all anyway!

**.E ..E ..E ..E .** Kakki/Maria/Queen of the MEEP. **. 3.. 3.. 3.. 3.**


	4. t H e F i G h T i S o N

**On the Wings of Revenge**

**By:** Zeida and Maria (Maria)

**Warnings: **Insanity, crack, violence, blood gore, plotholes, randomness, lack of plot to begin with, language etc... etc...

**Disclaimer:** I don't own it.

**Summary:** Poor Naruto, I keep letting him be kidnapped. Zabuza finds Naruto after Haku, and takes him away. This is half crack nuttiness. Vengeful!Naruto. It's starting to look like a foursome to me but it's _not_. Just brother love? Gaara, Haku, Naruto and Sasuke...nuttiness. Shikamaru shows a lot too! Have I proved myself nuts yet? Inspired by my own nutty-ness.

ChApTeR fOuR: The Fight is On

Sasuke sighed, Ino, Shikamaru and himself left the house in a bored fashion. They headed out to the village, list in hand, and mentally preparing themselves for buying food. Well, really, buying it with Ino.

Ino chatted happily as they headed out to the village, talking about anything from Sasuke, to coming full circle and talking about Sasuke again. It didn't seem to matter to her that this was all in front of the poor boy. Soon they neared a vendor who looked at least ready to try and cheat them with remotely edible substances. Sasuke grumbled as Ino argued with the woman to lower the outrageous prices.

"Now look here-"

"Shut it, Ino." Shikamaru commanded in a annoyed tone. He passed her the original amount and muttered something containing the words 'troublesome' and 'women'.

A strange sort of breeze blew by them. All three spun as a strange presence sped past them. Sasuke stared as he recognized the red head from yesterday, giggling madly and clutching what looked like someone's laundry close to his chest. The cheerful blond, laughing his head off, and the very pretty boy from yesterday soon followed him. The small group of nin stared after them a second, be fore noting something very strange was going on.

"They didn't even notice us." Sasuke muttered, slightly disappointed. Shikamaru snorted.

"No one else noticed them." He turned to the shopkeeper they were just about to leave. "Does this happen often?"

The lady nodded, a small smile appeared on her face. "Yep, That they do. Ever since they was hired by Gatou. You wouldn't believe he hired them, seeing them play around so much. They even played with some of the orphans once."

The young nins looked startled a second. "Wasn't anyone scared?!" Ino asked.

"Well, 'course. At first, we was terrified, but they're prolly just some misunderstood kids that need money. Just like the rest of us."

They were silent a moment, contemplating. But suddenly, the last detail was noticed-

"That boy hardly had anything on!" Ino exclaimed after a moment.

Indeed he didn't, Haku was only dressed in his turtleneck, boxers, and one sandal. He was in a _very _bad mood.

Naruto giggled as he ran deeper into the forest. He darted right, while Gaara took off to the left. Delving deeper and deeper into the foliage, the blond took a quick peek back, Haku wasn't following him. That wasn't right, he was supposed to be the distraction. The red head had the clothes after all. Naruto, wondering what he should do, slowed to a stop. Hmmm... To return and be murdered for helping, or wait while Haku calms down, then return.

Was there a choice?

The boy wandered aimlessly around, counting down in his head to when Haku will have calmed down. He froze, mentally stuck on a number when he heard a noise to his right.

"Hello, little one... What are you doing out here all alone?" said a deep, frightening voice from the bushes. Naruto stood where he was, in the middle of the clearing. A tall man hopped down from a tree, landing a couple feet from the boy. His hair was dark, as dark as Haku's, and it was long, pulled back into a ponytail. His face seemed young, but it was hard to tell, as he hadn't looked up yet. Naruto could barely make out dark scars on his cheeks, one under each eye. The man looked up, Mangekyo Sharingan whirling as he stared the blond right in the eye.

Uchiha Itachi laughed as the boy fell to the ground, screaming.

_Naruto looked around him in confusion, wasn't he just in that clearing with the strange man? The darkness seemed to evaporate slowly, leaving a dark shape behind for a split second._

_"You will suffer the deaths of your loved ones..." Itachi hissed._

_"What?-" the blond said, before he was cut off by a scream._

_A horribly familiar scream..._

_"Haku!" Naruto race off in the direction of the voice. He slowed for a moment when he saw the Ice Prison rise in the distance. In the middle was Haku, still screaming. the boy rushed closer, worried for his brother._

_The ice-nin stood unsteadily on his feet. There were senbon flying everywhere, almost too fast for the blond to see. Haku shrieked horribly every time that one of the flying senbon hit him. He was cover in the metal needles, blood pouring out of the multiple cuts and wounds as well as dripping out the corners of his lips. More needles shot out of the multiple mirror, hitting their target every time, no matter how hard he tried to dodge. There was nothing in the mirrors that Naruto could see, or maybe it was moving to fast even for them. Finally the dark haired boy fell, unable to continue any longer. Naruto rushed to his aid, but as he tenderly lifted the already cooling body, it dissolved, fading into dust. _

_Another cry sounded, it was not pained, but enraged. Naruto ran to it, recognizing it as Gaara's._

_Gaara stared at him, bloody and battered and-_

_Dead. Crushed by the sand that had always saved him before._

_Empty eyes gazed at him, blaming, accusing... hopeless..._

_Gaara faded away again, before Naruto could react. There was a strangled gasp, cut out suddenly with a sickening squelch._

_Zabuza-sama. Bloody, and cut up. Both arms looked broken, and he was completely covered in blood, though Naruto couldn't tell if it was his. Swords and arrows and kunai were sticking out of him haphazardly, and his bandages were unraveled, revealing a blood stained face._

_He was Dead._

_His sensei, the first person who helped him, took him away from all the pain... who _**wanted **_him._

_Dead._

_Again his loved one faded away, re-forming into Haku, or was it Gaara?. Naruto could no longer tell through the tears in his eyes. The dead nin's eyes shot open, staring at the blond._

_"Na...Ru...To..." He said, his voice somehow sounding like all of his precious people at once._

_Suddenly there was no dead person in his arms. No terrifyingly blank eyes staring at him. Instead he was kneeling on bloody ground, coated in the sickly beautiful red. Haku, Gaara and Zabuza stood around him, still dead, but standing. They stared at him with glazed eyes and an utterly betrayed feeling emitting from them. All of them just said one thing before vanishing, blowing away in the wind._

_"Why didn't you __**save **__us?"_

_He screamed._

Haku spun around in the direction of the noise. Gaara froze, dropping the small bundle of the ice nin's clothes. They share a glance before shooting of in the direction to the tortured noise. The clothing lay forgotten in a heap on the floor.

Naruto was huddled in the middle of the clearing, eyes unfocused and tears pouring down his face. He was curled us as small as he could get in a fetal position. A tall, dark haired man stood over him, smiling grimly. two blurs sped down from the trees to the terrified blond. "Naruto! Naruto, wake up!"

"Come on, tell us what happened." Haku coaxed the sobbing boy.

"_I_ happened." said a bored voice from behind them. Gaara stood and turned slowly to the Uchiha traitor.

"What. Did. You. Do. To. Him?" he growled, stalking over the red eyed man. Each word was punctuated by an enraged step closer.

"I saw that he would have to fight my baby brother. He could kill him. I didn't like that, and I was around, so I made sure he would be in no fit position to harm him." Itachi drawled. He smiled sickly at them, then vanished.

"Damn it! Damn _him_!" Gaara yelled.

Naruto recovered quickly to a speaking ability when he saw that his family was safe.

"Zabuza-sama..." he whispered, drawing their attention. "Is Zabuza-sama okay?"

Haku smiled reassuringly. "Yes, it was all an illusion. Everyone is okay."

"Not for long..." Gaara muttered. "Naruto? You okay now? Can you get back safe without me?"

Naruto smiled, a little shakily, but genuinely, at the redhead. "Don't worry, it'll take more than that to get me. Besides, Haku is with me, too" The other nin nodded, agreeing.

Gaara smiled sweetly, planning the painful, and lengthy demise of the brat that called for this.

**-:- -:- -:-**

The door to Tazuna's house crashed in. A aura of pure hatred washed over them all, scaring little Inari and starling the shinobi.

Gaara stalked up to the very confused Sasuke. The broody boy took an unconscious step back. The whole room stared at the sudden intrusion.

"Why the _fuck _did you sic you psycho brother on us?" the red head bit out. The last-Uchiha-that-mattered backed up against a wall, the sand nin kept stalking closer. They were barely a foot apart when the redhead's words hit Sasuke.

"My... brother?" he said softly, the realization dawning. "You think I told that _bastard _to attack you?! The only thing I'm gonna do to that... _thing_, is KILL him!" he hissed. Gaara blinked, and blinked again.

"Wait, what? You want to kill your brother? Why would you wanna do that?" he asked curiously. _Wow_. thought Sasuke, _One track mind._

The Uchiha blinked at him. "Weren't you just about to kill me for that bastard attacking you?" The people around him winced. It wasn't the sanest thing to remind your killer to kill you.

"We'll get back to that! Anyway, you have the Sharingan eyes, right?" Gaara asked, leaning closer and peering into the black eyes.

"Well, not yet-" Sasuke managed, before the sand nin cut him off.

"Do you like or hate your village?"

"I like or hate people in it-"

"A lot?"

"Would you let me talk-"

"Answer the question!" Gaara grumped, not allowing him time to finish... again.

"I dislike more people than I like." Sasuke finished quickly. Where was this going?

"Are you loyal to the village, or is killing that... _man_ your first priority?"

"What are you-!" _Don't ask something like that!_

"Let's go!" Gaara chirped, summoning large amounts of sand and transporting them away before either jounin or genin had a chance to react.

"Sensei?" Sakura asked, still staring at the spot where her crush had been moments before.

"Yes, Sakura?" Kakashi responded, also staring.

"Was Sasuke just kidnapped?"

"Yes, I believe he was." _Did he just... what?!_

**(2)** "Hmmm, I thought that's what happened." she was silent a second before her eyes widened to plates and she _screamed_. "SOME LITTLE MOTHER FUCKING REDHEAD KIDNAPED _MY _SASUKE-KUN?! I'LL RIP HIM APART AND STRANGLE THE DICK BY HIS OWN INTESTINES UNTIL THEY'RE FREAKING **DEAD**!"

-:- -:- -:-

Zabuza-sama!" Gaara called into the large hotel room. "Zabuza-sama! Can I have a pet?"

"PET?! Are you calling me a pet?!" Sasuke objected, struggling to escape.

"Yes. Can I _please_? He's got Sharingan! Or he will when I'm done with him."

"You're gonna help me get Sharingan?" the boy froze, looking back at his captor.

"Yeah, you won't be any use otherwise."

"What?! I can be useful!" he was fully facing the redhead, glowing with rage and surprise. This was the first time anyone, completely disregarding his brother for once, had ever thought him useless!

"Good! Can you cook? I suck at it. Naruto likes instant and Haku won't cook all the time."

"How... is that relevant...?"

"Well, we have to take turns, right?"

Sasuke blinked, and stopped, forcing Gaara, who had a firm grip on his wrist to stop as well. "What are you going to do with me, and why?"

"I'm gonna keep you and train you if Zabuza-sama says yes. I've heard of that evil-eye Sharingan that that freak has. Sadly no one without Sharingan stands a chance. Otherwise I would have torn him apart on the spot."

Sasuke winced. He had no doubt that the small red head could do just that.

"And you wanna kill him. So you will train, to be able to? I promise to keep you even after he dies."

"You... he... what? You admit that...? He... can't be beat without me? He can only be beat by me...?" Some small part of him swelled with a strange feeling. What was it? Hmm, felt kind of nice. **(1)**

"Well, you or that teacher that was fighting with you. The one with the silver hair? But he's an adult and all adults but Zabuza-sama suck. It's a proven fact!! Me an' Naruto did research!"

"Oh. Kakashi isn't that bad, but he won't help you."

Gaara gave his a deadpan look for proving what he had just stated. "... See? Besides adults don't like me and Naruto and Haku. They're scared of us. Even when we were just little kids." Gaara looked away, sadly.

Sasuke felt he could sympathize, in an odd way. The elders of his village always judged him before they knew him. He was always the last Uchiha, special, a genius. He shouldn't hang out with those lazy people he does, he should graduate early. Well, sucks to them, they couldn't see how special his friend was. He doubted anyone could, even his own father.

Shikamaru had said that his sensei treated him differently, however, than most people that knew him. But he must have been the only one, if Sasuke's hypothesis was even true. Everyone else focused on himself.

He was as good as his brother, it was a _right shame_ that he went bad and killed his _entire family! _Sasuke's eye twitched.

The broody boy sighed an lightly put a hand on the others shoulder. "Believe it or not... I kinda know what it feels like, even though you had it worse, didn't you? Is that why Naruto left our village?"

"How do you know he's from Konoha?

"Well, I recognized him. He was in my class, and I kinda, sorta I don't know, we just got along in a strange way. I didn't remember any of that until just lately.

"You forgot about him." Gaara stated.

"I think it was to hard on me to lose someone so suddenly... again. I was just a kid."

"That's why you want to kill that man?"

"..."

"You don't have to tell me why, you just have to improve like hell."

"Don't you have to ask that missing nin-"

"Zabuza-sama!"

"Yeah, well, didn't you say you were going to ask if you can," he winced. But this was going towards killing Itachi. "keep me?"

"Yes, he does." Zabuza said, having listened to the entire conversation from the door.

Sasuke stared at him, backing away unconsciously.

"I'm not going to kill you, kid. Gaara can have his fun but," he turned to the red head, who was grinning like no tomorrow, "You have to take care of him. Haku and Naruto are in your room, waiting for you. You had a pretty good idea." he turned to go back into his own room, stopping only to toss one last thing over his shoulder. "Naruto will be fine, don't worry."

Gaara jumped up and dived down the hall, yipping and cheering. "Narutoooooo!" he crowed, tackling said blond onto the bed and nuzzling him until one side on his face was red.

Naruto laughed and hugged Gaara back, assuring him silently that he was fine.

Haku smiled at them before turning to the bewildered newcomer. "Hello, Sasuke-san. My name is Haku." he held out his hand to the boy. Sasuke frowned but shook it. Were they enemies not five minutes ago?

"Don't worry, you'll have fun here. Naruto and I will help with your training as well."

"Oh... Thank you, I guess."

Naruto and Gaara sat on the bed, whispering together and throwing the occasional glance at Sasuke. They giggled suddenly, turning to he ice nin. "Haku? Can you get us a scroll? We need to make the lesson plan for Uke-chan." They giggled again.

Sasuke started. They were moving fast. Wait...

"UKE-CHAN?! I am NOT an UKE!"

They blinked at him, Haku going red and quickly leaving the room to find the scroll, and a couple brushes.

Black eyes glare at blue and green ones. "He needs a collar." Naruto decided, rather abruptly.

"Yeah... that would look cool." Gaara agreed, tilting his head slightly to the side and scrutinizing their latest 'friend'.

Sasuke twitched.

"Hmmm... What color do you like, _Uke-chan_?"

He twitched again. "If I did not think that I would greatly benefit from your training, I think I would try and kill you right now..."

"Is that a compliment or a threat?" Gaara asked, mock bewildered. Naruto snickered.

"I don't know. Compliment, I think." Sasuke decided, sitting in a chair opposite the bed. Haku returned then, sitting with his brothers on the bed. They started writing on the multiple scrolls, informing Sasuke verbally of a few of their ideas, and asking him his opinion on what he needs to work on.

"Genjutsu. I really can't do genjutsu, or break it." Sasuke admits after a moment. Truthfully, this was after about half and hour of wheedling that he had to have at least one thing he wasn't good at. Naruto said 'god', but it was the same thing, really.

"Hmmm. We should get that done... And he should learn most of the basics and lower levels of skills before getting his Sharingan." Haku muttered, writing on a scroll in precise small handwriting.

"Why?" Sasuke grumped, indignant that they should think that he even needed to.

"Well, your Sharingan can instantly teach you a move, well most moves anyway. It could actually be dangerous for you to do that move in some cases, if you don't understand what you are doing. It is also easier to improvise if you _know _what you doing, and not just _how _to do it." Naruto informed him, taking a schoolmaster tone of voice.

_He sounds like Iruka-sensei._

"It also just feels nice when you get something right from hard work alone." Haku chirped, smiling brightly.

Sasuke nodded, waiting for another suggestion, or question.

-:- -:- -:-

Shikamaru sighed heavily and sped up to catch his team, who was leaving him behind. Chouji appeared next to him giving a worried look.

"I'm fine." The shadow nin signaled silently. Not too many people could understand their code. The three of them had come up with it on their own. Shikamaru had researched the signs that the ANBU of their village used and they used it to try and make their own code as unique as possible.

They had always had a sneaking suspicion that their Academy sensei, Iruka, could understand it and so they made the whole language for privacy.

"Don't worry about Sasuke. We'll get him back." Kakashi said suddenly from up a head.

"Yeah," Asuma added. "We'll get him back. But now we have to protect Tazuna-san." The remainder of the team nodded and sped ahead.

Zabuza stood alone leering at them in an amused fashion. Upon entering the area, still a bit away from the bridge, most of the ninja noticed a familiar chakra. Shikamaru instantly spun to stare at a tree ten feet beyond Zabuza. He could just barely make out pale skin and black hair standing next to the blond boy from yesterday, who was seated on the tree branch. The shadow nin noticed the red headed kidnaper standing in another tree to the left of the man in the clearing and the black haired boy to the right of Sasuke's tree. Shikamaru pulled out a kunai and attached something to it, biting his thumb and scribbling hastily. Zabuza looked at him, getting into a ready stance. Then he threw it, straight into the tree where his old friend stood.

Sasuke easily caught the poorly thrown knife, looking at it cautiously, and noticing the little note in blood.

'Remember this? What happened?- Shika'

The black haired nin laughed to himself, remembering all too well the time that his friends and himself had come up with this strange little game. The started playing it during class one day, perfecting their writing speed (for summoning and a couple other more advanced jutsu, should they learn them), and accuracy all in one. Poor Iruka-sensei had thought they'd gotten in some sort of war until he got a hold on one of the note heavy weapons. Sasuke sighed, _his first detention_.

Quickly biting his own thumb, he slipped out a scrap of paper and wrote a reply and attached the note. Naruto watched in amusement as the kunai went sailing back to the boy with the ponytail three seconds after he received it. Uke-chan was better than he thought! He barely caught that Sasuke was writing something, and couldn't even make out what. What a fun game.

Down below, just about everyone had gotten a very different impression. Both the sensei had noticed that their missing charge was in the tree and were none too happy to see that Shikamaru had attacked him. The feeling merely grew when the kunai was returned with deadly accuracy.

Zabuza smiled, so the boy had made his loyalties known. That was good to know, that he was at last going to stay for a little bit. The Sharingan was a very useful ability, and the boy would fit right in. Haku and Naruto had proven to be excellent teachers and the Uchiha would soon be up to standards. Now all that was left was to take out some stress on these walking punching bags.

Shikamaru looked down at the note, smiling to himself at the response.

'How could I forget? I'm leaving the village for a little bit. Training. I wouldn't attack you or Chou.'

Again, he scribbled away using the back of the slip, as it was too troublesome to try and figure out where he had left any other scraps.

'Are you going to be gone long? Who is who?'

Haku watched as the kunai went sailing back even quicker than before. Something was going on here. The accuracy of the throws was amazing but there was no strength behind it. How strange.

On the ground, several others were noticing his little bit as well, mainly a certain silver haired jounin who stuck out a hand to intercept the knife as it went speeding back to the deer boy. With one eye, he grazed the note, recognizing the writing as Sasuke's.

'As long as I need, I'm thinking a year or more. The blond is Naruto like they said, The black haired _boy_ is Haku, my kidnapper is Gaara.'

Kakashi raised one visible eyebrow, and flipped the paper, looking for any other messages. Shikamaru snatched the note then, glaring at the sensei and reading it for himself, he quickly sent another reply out, nearly collapsing in surprise as the jounin intercepted that as well.

'Cool. Sorry about that. I'm gonna miss you. Visit.' The man read it quickly and before the shadow nin could steal it back, sent it off to Sasuke. Receiving it, the boy scowled at his sensei, knowing he could at the very least feel it. The black haired boy scribbled down another reply, sending the kunai off at an odd angle, along with another, right at his friend hoping to distract the increasingly annoying man.

It didn't work. Kakashi went after the correct one right off the bat. Shikamaru , in boredom, caught, and pocketed the extra.

'Maybe. and Dearest Sensei? GO THE FUCK AWAY!' Kakashi snorted and tossed the note to Shikamaru, while keeping the kunai as of to say no more playing.

Zabuza, by now slightly bored and itching to spar called out. "Alright, alright, I think you got the point on who's side the kid's on, can we get on with this?"

The two jounin sensei stepped up to face Zabuza, happy to except his challenge. Behind them, Sakura set up a powerful genjutsu as the rest of the genin left to do something a little different.

-:- -:- -:-

_**--Flashback; Tazuna's House--**_

"Now, everyone I need you to listen very closely. From the information that Ino, Sasuke, and Shikamaru have give us, Asuma and I have come up with a plan. If we are right than Zabuza and those boys will not fight if they have no one to pay them.

"What I need you to do is to find Gatou and kill him or bring him to us to kill. I'm afraid he must be dead for several reasons, mainly because they may decide to try and rescue their meal ticket." The genin around Kakashi nodded seriously. Asuma took it from there and explained the mission and who would do what.

"We need one of you, who is good at genjutsu, to stay with us, Kakashi and myself, and create an illusion of the rest of the team. Me and Kakashi will be distracting them, and the rest of you have to track down that man." The men looked apologetically at the genin. They would likely be funding 'first kill' therapy after this mission. It was really unfortunate.

Then, of course, Gaara has to smash in and kidnap Sasuke.

Who knows the plan.

And is working with the enemy even if he is still a friend.

_**--End Flashback--**_

-:- -:- -:-

Shikamaru sighed, snapping back to the present. They had a mission to do.

Earlier that day, they had located the house that Gatou stayed at, and was supposed to be at this time of day. They would arrive shortly.

-:- -:- -:-

Naruto and Gaara kept on giggling to themselves and looking back at Sasuke. Needless to say the Uchiha was getting very annoyed. Haku kept glaring lightly at the two mischievous boys and glancing sympathetically at the newest member of their group. This probably wouldn't be good for a weak stomach.

They arrived at the tree house soon enough, and the group split up with orders to reach the center of the tree house. Gatou's meeting room. Sasuke had to get there without a scratch.

In his hideout, Gatou surrounded himself with every kind of bodyguard possible. From traditional samurai to modern hit men.

They stood no chance.

Sasuke perched himself on a branch-rafter as he watched them annihilate the unfortunate punching bags. He was fuming a little about being told that he could only sit back and watch, but Gaara had promised something extra-special in surprise.

Haku motioned for him to catch the greedy businessman, who was currently attempting to escape in the chaos. The Uchiha made quick work of him, binding him to a chair at the head of the expensive and bloodstained table. Naruto and Gaara smiled sadistically at the man. Haku looked at him with disgust while Sasuke directed his disgust at the distinct scent of the coward wetting himself.

"Kill him." The red head ordered suddenly.

Sasuke started, "What?!"

"Kill him." he insisted, tossing the black haired boy a bloody kunai. He stared at it a second, then at the evil man. His eyes grew cold suddenly and he slashed the knife through his throat.

Sasuke twitched as a small wave of red liquid splashed across his face and chest. It was covered in another's blood that he turned around to Shikamaru yelling his name in fear.

**Owari!**

-:- -:- -:-

**OMG! While editing this, I found this huge mistake that I really can't beleive my dear reviewers didn't spot! Then again, I can't beleive I wrote it.**

**"Sasuke grumbled as Ino argued with the ****man****to lower the outrageous prices.**

**"Now look here-"**

**"Shut it, Ino." Shika commanded in a annoyed tone. He passed the ****woman ****the original amount and muttered something concerning the words 'troublesome' and 'women'."**

**(1)** He feels needed, but he doesn't understand that yet. It's a nice feeling. I think Sasuke needs to feel needed, not just desired by Fangirls, biased villagers and creepy pedophile snake-people. That puts him in common with Naruto, Haku and Gaara who need to be needed(and loved in canon Gaara case, but I changed that, _just _a little) as well. The only difference is that Sasuke is dense and didn't recognize this(in canon too). XD

(2) Warning: Extream Language ahead! XD

I would like to inform people that since Naru-chan wasn't in Konoha, Mizuki is still at large, but for the same reason, he couldn't steal the scroll. You guys want him to show later?

Also, don't you love cliffies.

I made this longer as an apology. I SOOOOWWWWY! ((sniff)) I wuv you all, really! It's just that school has started again, and I got really sick (ish behind in studywork)

So, I hope this makes up for it.

Reviews are my... HW inspiration!

**.E ..E ..E ..E .** Kakki/Maria/Queen of the MEEP. **. 3.. 3.. 3.. 3.**


	5. f E a R m E !

**On the Wings of Revenge**

**By:** Zeida and Maria (Maria)

**Warnings: **Insanity, crack, violence, blood gore, plotholes, randomness, lack of plot to begin with, language etc... etc...

**Disclaimer:** I don't own it.

**Summary:** Poor Naruto, I keep letting him be kidnapped. Zabuza finds Naruto after Haku, and takes him away. This is half crack nuttiness. Vengeful!Naruto. It's starting to look like a foursome to me but it's _not_. Just brother love? Gaara, Haku, Naruto and Sasuke...nuttiness. Shikamaru shows a lot too! Have I proved myself nuts yet?

ChApTeR fIvE: Fear Me! 

**Dedicated to Sarutobi Asuma**

**May he be happily reincarnated soon**

"Sasuke!?" Shikamaru stood at the entrance to the hall. His gaze was transfixed in the blade in Sasuke's hand. His eyes flicked to the now late Gatou before traveling up the blade arm to his best friend's blood splattered face.

Sasuke tilted his head to show he was listening, wiping of his kunai and putting it away. He waited, seemingly not noticing that he had just killed someone, and was covered in the deceased's blood. The three boys around him glared warily at Shikamaru and shifted into a fighting stance, prepared to attack.

The lazy genius wasn't sure what to do… yet. Sasuke wouldn't attack him, but the other three seemed to think he was a danger. That meant to protect themselves, they would likely try, and were quite capable of, killing him. The fact that his best friend had just killed a bound man and didn't care should be taken into account. The three not-quite missing ninja had plenty of time to mess with Sasuke's head. He was easy to mess with, if power was added, despite all the sleeping time the Nara had given up to trying to right the boy. (On the request of Chouji, of course.)

Of course Gatou was a very bad man, and obviously deserved to die.

And he had been sent here to kill him himself.

Only to find that the people seemingly working for the man had just slaughtered him. So loyalty was an issue, and he couldn't guarantee his own safety, should he try to negotiate, or form a truce.

Sighing, Shikamaru sat on the ground. He crossed his legs, pretzel style, and busied himself with removing all his weapons and dumping them on a pile. Sasuke immediately walked over and helped him, setting everything in organized piles before both did the same to Sasuke's arsenal. Shikamaru found something akin to a handkerchief and tried to wipe down the Uchiha's face.

Keyword 'tried'. He stopped as soon as the twitching boy nearly bit him.

Naruto, Gaara and Haku stared, frozen as the scene played out. They continued to stare as whatever strange ritual this was ended, and as the boys sat in a comfortable silence, their tasks completed. (Unles you count the smidge of blood over the Uchiha's nose.) And still they stared. And still they sat there, no move was made, no words were spoken.

Naruto relaxed first, unable to stay still any longer. This was just the person that Uke-chan was chatting with anyway so he couldn't be that bad. His siblings soon followed the blonde's example, and sheathed their weapons. No one was sure what was going on, and Sasuke and Shika _still_ hadn't said anything.

"Sasuke?" The kyuubi vessel asked, tentatively.

The black haired boy turned around and raised a questioning eyebrow. "Are you going to stand there all day?" he asked when Naruto didn't respond. "We have to wait for Zabuza-san-"

"Zabuza-sama!" Haku piped up, coming closer to the two boys on the ground.

"-before we go." He continued, making no reaction to his teammate's correction. "Shika has to wait for Asuma-sensei-"

"Asuma-baka!" Gaara half growled, half yelled, however he pulled that off. He walked purposefully up behind Haku. Shikamaru frowned.

"-and Kakashi-sensei-"

"Kakashi-baka!" Naruto also interrupted, stepping up to the little group as well.

"-and the rest of his teammates before _he_ can go. We are just passing the time, and it would be rude if we just let you standing there." The Uchiha promptly turned back to his lazy friend. They sat in silence again, although apparently they had been having a conversation.

The three stood a moment more, straining to hear the non-existent, yet obviously present conversation, before giving up and just sitting down with them. Maybe it was a close range telepathic jutsu…?

The small group was still sitting there, doing absolutely nothing, when most of the rest of Shikamaru's team came through the doorway.

"Hey, Shika! Did you find-" Chouji half-yelled thought the door, freezing at the sight of all the blood and gore.

"Shika!?" The rest of the group came through the door, rushing over to the lazy boy and grilling him for explanations. The lazy genius promptly clapped his hands over his ears.

Sasuke, Gaara, Naruto, and Haku waited patiently for the new arrivals to notice them.

And sure enough, Ino screamed, and launched herself at Sasuke who promptly ran and hid behind Chouji, as usual.

Chouji grabbed him in a hug. Not usual. The Akamichi boy searched him over for injuries and shoved a bag of chips into his hands.

"Chou… sit down and relax, I've already checked him over. Troublesome…"

The larger boy pouted at him, but released Sasuke and sat down. "Fine, fine. Sasuke, care to give an explanation?"

"Hn. Shika will. Later." He munched on the chips, a rare and worried gift from the boy. It would be rude and slightly dangerous to his health to refuse such an offering.

The rest of the group, just Ino really, calmed down and sat as well. The group sat in silence until Ino and Naruto, who both couldn't stand still any longer, shouted.

"Let's _do_ something already!" They looked at each other, frowning slightly.

"Are you really from Konoha?" Naruto asked, curious.

"Well, of course!" she exclaimed, proudly displaying the hitai-ate around her waist.

"Really? But you're to smart and cool to be from there!" the blond boy stared at her, waiting.

The blond girl blinked at him. Had she just been insulted and complimented at the same time?

Shikamaru, in that wonderful, intelligent way of his, raised the question that the rest of the small group had been thinking. "Huh?!"

"Well, obviously, I am the epitome of intelligence, and I wanted to do something, and she-" he points to Ino, "was thinking the same thing as me! Konoha is an idiotic village, so I wanted to know how she could have been from it!" Naruto finished, grinning like a maniac.

"Naruto." Gaara deadpanned. "_You_ were born in Konoha."

The blond pouted at him and opened his mouth to retaliate, but the entrance slammed open once more.

-:- -:- -:-

Asuma sighed at the scene. Sasuke looked distinctly distrustful of himself and Kakashi. The three missing nin were all but attacking right now, and most of his own students we just plain confused. Sakura looked ready to murder and it was only Ino holding her back.

How that happened, he would never know.

And he just _didn't _want to know _whom _she was going to murder, should the blonde girl let go.

Shikamaru, his very own student, just got up and planted himself right in front of Sasuke, making it clear that they would have to go through him if they wanted to hurt his best friend. Asuma sighed again. What was the world coming to?

"Shika, stop that." The lazy genius glared at his sensei (Asuma) and didn't budge an inch.

"Shikamaru. I'm _not_ going to _hurt_ him. He's staying here." Everyone turned to face the bearded man, looking at him oddly.

"What?" Kakashi squeaked.

"Uchiha Sasuke, unfortunately, died on a mislabeled A-class mission. We've just finished the funeral, and must get back to Konoha as Gatou is dead and the bridge is completed. Let's go."

The Jounin turned around and headed right out the door. Kakashi blinked, but followed him soon after, calling "C'mon now, don't be _late_." over his shoulder.

The girls looked at each other, then at Sasuke. "You'd better take care of yourself, Sasuke-kun." Ino ordered.

"Yeah! We haven't given up yet!" Sakura added. She turned to her silver haired sensei, yelling after him, as she and Ino followed them out the door. "Hypocrite!"

Chouji and Shikamaru looked after them for a minute, then turned to their best friend. "Sasuke… take care of your self, alright?" the deer boy said.

"Don't train yourself to death and _eat right_." Chouji ordered. Sasuke nodded, and the two boys enveloped him in a bone-crushing hug before rushing after their sensei.

"Thanks…" the Uchiha muttered, staring after them.

"I'll miss you."

**-:- -:- -:-**

Asuma and Kakashi waited patiently for their teams back on the bridge. Sakura and Ino had arrived, nearly crying and were currently clinging to Kakashi. To both men's surprise, Kakashi let them and even comforted them.

'_Obito…'_

Asuma could see Choulji and Shika coming through the trees and waved to them lazily.

"C'mon boy, we have to act at least a little- oof!" Shika tackled him, hugging him around the middle and the Jounin could feel 'thank you's muttered over and over into his stomach.

He awkwardly patted his student's head but the genius had let go almost immediately and walked lazily to the other side of the bridge. Sensing no one following him, he turned back slightly, frowning at them. "What are you waiting for? I want my bed." As if nothing had happened.

Obviously he wasn't the best of actors, seeing as one of his best friends had just recently 'died'.

Asuma and Kakashi snorted and followed. Everyone made their nice leisurely pace back to Konoha. Shikamaru turned back once more, unnoticed by everyone except one. "Thanks, Sensei."

Asuma smiled.

-:- -:- -:-

Zabuza arrived moments after the other team had left. Or rather, he showed himself. He had really been listening to the whole thing, and was quite confused. But the kid was staying with him, and that's what mattered.

He could do better with the Uchiha than them, anyway. He'd probably be happier too, not that that was something that he was intending to prioritize. He wasn't getting a soft spot for abandoned brats.

He wasn't!

"Hi, Zabuza-sama!" Three of his charges called, noticing his 'arrival'. Sasuke was still staring out the door, but turned almost immediately to give him a respectful nod.

"It's time to head back, do you have the money?"

"Hai." Sasuke said, holding up a bag.

"Good. Follow me and keep up." The man jumped up, exiting through a window and vanishing into the trees. His students soon followed him. He made up a hard pace, testing the endurance of the new kid. Gaara would pick it up and set an appropriate training level.

Sasuke raced through the trees, following his new... team? They were a great bit faster than he, better trained too was. But that would change. He would reach their level. They would train him, as he was the only one could get their revenge. He had found a way to kill his brother, even if he did betray the village.

They didn't really do much for him anyway. Right? The Uchiha tried to push his thoughts away from Shikamaru and Chouji. He promised not to attack them. That was good enough!

Then thoughts of his sensei appeared… even _Sakura_.

The dark haired boyshook his head and looked ahead again to see the other boys far in front. He was going to lose them at this rate. Sighing, Sasuke pushed him self even further, slowly catching up.

-:- -:- -:-

Sasuke gasped to catch his breath. They stood in front of the gates to Kirigakure.

"Aren't you a missing nin from here?" he just barely managed to ask. They had been traveling all day at a dangerous pace, at least for him. The dark haired boy felt like he as going to collapse, but he couldn't. He needed to prove he was strong enough, or they would leave him.

Probably to die right here…

Zabuza snorted, looking him up and down subtly. The kid was nearly asleep on his feet. It was really a credit to him that he was awake. A normal kid shouldn't be. A mid chuunin, maybe a really low Jounin probably wouldn't be. "It would be in the village's best interest if they allowed their Kage to reside there, don't you think?" he asked mysteriously.

Sasuke blinked at him a second before the implications sunk in. "Oh!" he whispered in surprise before his fatigue got the better of him and his eyes rolled upward. Gaara caught him as he fell.

"About time..." he muttered, hoisting the boy over his shoulder. _"_I was expecting this half way back!"

Haku smiled, "He has a very strong will. I think you did a very good thing, bringing him." the ice nin looked to Zabuza for support. The tall man nodded shortly then vanished, teleporting instantly to the Mizukage's office. The boys grinned at the thought of finally being home and marched happily in the gates, happy to take the long way.

-:- -:- -:-

Sasuke looked around his new room. It was next to Haku's and right across the hall from Gaara's. Naruto's was next to the redhead's, diagonal from his.

The room was still blank, but that was going to be taken care of very quickly. It was empty of everything save several buckets of paint near three of the four dull white walls.

He walked around the area slowly, making sure that everything was ready. This was the first time he had done anything like this, and it had to go perfectly. At first he had argued. Fitting the room to him was stupid. It wasn't like there was going to be anything special about it, and he most certainly wasn't about to go and decorate it.

But Naruto and Gaara had thought otherwise. Hard. There was really no going against them, they were stubborn enough to weather a mountain range through to the other side of the planet. It was just unhealthy to try and get out of it.

So, he might as well do it right.

Sasuke looked over the gallons of paint again, checking the labels, and making sure there was enough. He had chosen a nice deep purple-red, almost crimson. The dark haired boy was actually quite surprised that red hadn't been used yet. He thought for sure that at least Gaara would have wanted it. Haku's room was a light, soothing blue, but it was obvious that he would choose something like that. Naruto's was… you guessed it, orange. Sasuke had wondered how on earth a ninja could like the color, it was absurd. Naruto's answer was that he hadn't always liked it, in fact as a kid, he despised the color. But, as he explained, it kinda grew on you. It was just too cheerful to be left out!

Sasuke shuddered, glad at least, the boy didn't _wear_ to damned color.

Gaara's room, contrary to what he would have thought was a dark, forest green, and a little bit of neon green, along with pastel green and every other green in between. When the Uchiha had first walked in, he had been able to do no more than blink for several seconds, taking in all the… green. Apparently the redhead was very fond of the color. It had something to do with a rare good memory of his childhood before he went to Zabuza.

Sasuke frowned as he passed a particularly suspicious looking paint bucket.

The tag said pink,

_Pink_.

As in the _paint_ was _pink!_

…

He growled. "Stupid pranking idiots…(1)" he muttered as he picked up the offending bucket and dumped it, not out off the can, outside his door. Looking back, he carefully counted the brushes, and laid the tarp out, checking the corners around twenty times each.

"Uke-chan!" He heard someone, probably Naruto, yell through the hall.

"We're back!" yelled another. Sasuke recognized him as Gaara. They came rushing sown the halls, heading to Sasuke's new room. The boys had been out shopping for furniture for the room. Haku had made the Uchiha stay home, knowing that he wouldn't pick anything comfortable, and more likely than not get distracted by the weapons. All three came into the room, dressing smocks and ready to paint. Naruto shoved another one at Sasuke, who pulled it over his head. Gaara practically skipped over to the paint, looking a little disappointed, Sasuke noticed, when his eyes passed a blank spot that once held the pink paint.

Gotcha. He thought, planning a revenge on the boy sometime in the near future.

The painting went on fairly peacefully, fights only breaking out twice. Although in the space of those two, all four boys managed to get pretty painted. Revenge was sweet, even if it was petty.

Wait, he did not just think that!

Next came the furniture, which, to Sasuke's horror, actually looked quite comfortable.

"How am I supposed to get out of a bed like _that_ to go training?!" he exclaimed when Haku asked how he could possibly be upset about their choice in upholstery.

Soon the room was finished, and Sasuke had to admit, he quite liked it. He had, along with his too-comfortable-for-his-own-health-and-fitness-(2) bed, a dresser, a desk, two chairs. Naruto was convinced that he was going to break at least one of them. And a full floor rug. A soft, black one.

He really liked this room. Except he didn't, because it was just a room, and was only there to prove him a study space and a temporary rest area and privacy.

"Why are you doing this all for me…?" he muttered to himself as they were leaving to do their own… whatever they did at four o'clock.

Gaara looked over his should briefly, hearing the whisper words.

"I told you." He said, smiling _almost_ gently. "I'm keeping you."

-:- -:- -:-

Sasuke slipped into ready stance while Gaara prowled around him, checking his form. It was the third day since he arrived, and they were going to do a quick check of his stance form, before moving on to genjutsu. They had done sparring the day before, which, to his horror, Sasuke lost miserably at. Naruto, in a moment of sweetness, informed him that he was far better than most people he fought were.

The day before, they didn't really have time for much, as that was when they were getting his room ready. Haku just gave him a quick quiz on weapons, while Gaara made sure that his basics, henge, bushin, and kawarimi, were up to scratch. Thankfully they were. Sasuke didn't know what he'd do if he had to go over that again.

The Uchiha slid into another position as the red head wandered around him. "He's fine!" the boy finally called out. Sasuke relaxed, crossing his arms expectantly, waiting for them to explain the exercise.

"Well." Began Naruto. "Basically, it will be sparring again."

The dark haired boy groaned, remembering the other day.

"No, no! We aren't looking for sparring skill! And that can be fixed anyway. I will focus on trying to catch you. You have to stay free as long as possible. I'm going to use genjutsu."

They both shifted in to a fighting stance, waiting for the other to move. Gaara sneezed, and it began.

-:- -:- -:-

Sasuke flinched as the tree suddenly grabbed his neck, revealing itself to be the blond. Haku frown. That was a fairly low-grade genjutsu. Sasuke should have noticed the trap set up by the other bushin of Naruto pushing him to the tree.

Unless he thought it was really Naruto.

Haku groaned in to his hand. He couldn't even do that level of Genjutsu? This was actually bordering on pathetic, and it was _Haku_ thinking this.

As they were all sitting together after the battle, Haku tried to find a nice way to tell the boy that-

"Sasuke, " Gaara interrupted his thoughts, "Your genjutsu skills, in every area, suck ass."

Haku slapped his hand to his face, embarrassed for the Uchiha. _Tact, Gaara, tact!_ A sigh provoked him to look up again.

"I _know_. Didn't I tell you that before?" They blinked at him, the memory coming back slowly.

"Well, yeah, but I didn't think it was this bad." Naruto muttered trying to cover his momentary forgetfulness.

"Shut up. Just help me fix it, since you're all so almighty." In his own way, it was complement, admitting that the blond was better than he was. _Even if it won't last long... _he thought to himself.

The group was silent for a moment, thinking of ways to improve genjustu. It would have to be a little bit creative, because Sasuke didn't seem to type to be able to put up with doing something that he had all ready done, again. Besides, the other method had obviously not worked.

"Well, why don't we put him in a situation where he has to use genjustu?" Haku suggested.

The others' eyes lit up. "Yeah!" Gaara and Naruto crowed. A small smile formed on Sasuke's face at the thought of finally getting rid of that weakness.

"Infiltration?" the Uchiha offered.

Gaara suddenly got a mischievous glint in his eyes. He looked at them all conspiratorially. Leaning in playfully, he stage-whispered "Why don't we sneak into the Chuunin exams, in disguise. We could fool them all, even the Jounin."

Haku looked contemplative. "It would force you to stay in disguise, as it is in Konoha this year, but..."

"Why don't we do it?" Naruto piped up. Everyone looked at him, and he realized why they were so hesitant. "Oh! I don't care. It would be fun to trick them, and I don't think that the people that we met in Wave were all _that _bad. Ino's awesome!"

Sasuke raised an eyebrow delicately at him. "_Ino_?" he asked. She was just a mad fangirl, in his mind, that always gave Chou and Shikamaru grief about their personalities.

"Yeah!" Naruto confirmed, missing the odd look. Or ignoring it. "Now we just need to go ask Zabuza-sama."

Haku leapt up happily and ran to ask their sensei right away.Zabuza was walking down the hall, heading to one room or another in the huge Mizukage hall.

"Zabuza-sama! Zabuza-sama! I need-"

"Not now, Haku. I'm getting a glass of water."

"But Zabuza-sama, -"

"Not now, Haku. Wait a minute."

"But Zabuza-sama-!"

"Haku! Wait."

"Yes, Zabuza-sama…"

Ten Minutes Later

"Now, what did you want, Haku?"

"WejustfoundoutthatUke-chan'sgenjutsuisreallyreallyawfulsowewantedtopracticethatandGaara cameupwithareallyreallygoodidea!WewanttogotothechuuninexamsinKonohaindisguise!Canyouletusgo!Please!Pleaseplease!Itwouldbereallyfun!"

Zabuza blinked. And blinked again. "Haku?"

"Yes, Zabuza-sama?"

"I didn't understand a single word you said. Say it again. Slower."

Haku pouted. "We justfound out thatUke-chan's genjutsuisreallyreally awfulso we wantedtopractice thatandGaara cameup withareally really goodidea!We want togotothe chuunin examsin Konohaindisguise! Canyouletusgo! Please!Pleaseplease! It wouldbereally fun!"

"Still too fast." Zabuza sighed, leaning back on his cushiony chair and sipping his well-earned water. "Say it _Slow_."

"We… just… found… out… that… Uke-chan's… genjutsu… is really… really… awful… so… we… wanted… to… practice… that… and… Gaara… came… up… with… a… really… really… good… idea…! We… want… to… go… to… the… chuunin… exams… in… Konoha… in… disguise…! Can… you… let… us… go…? Please…! Please…, please…! It… would… be… really… fun…!"

Zabuza blinked at his student, who was starting to look quite exasperated. He smiled to himself.

"Too slow! I lost interest half way through." The Mizukage teased happily.

Haku stared, blinked, and sighed. "Zabuza-sama…." He whined.

"Fine, fine, you can go to whatever it was you were asking."

Haku's face it up and he dove out the door sprinting down the hall.

"Wait a second…" the ice nin froze. "He still didn't hear what I was trying to say…"

**-:-Owari-:- **

(1) my computer wanted to correct that to oddities. I was very tempted to let it.

(2) it wanted to correct _that_ one to for his own health and 'fatness.' That would have been hilarious.)

A/N: Sorry that it took so long! FORGIVE ME, LOYAL REVIEWERS!

I have some good news and some bad news. Good: I survived the first quarter and am now doing better in Bio! Also: I have random bits and pieces on future chapters to come. You can bet that the Chuunin exam is going to be an eventful one!

**Bad: I lost my plot bunnies. **They ran away. I don't know where this story is going anymore, or what is going to happen a few chapters from now. **Don't worry, I refuse to abandon my baby**, but it would be wonderful if you could give me suggestions on what to do next. What you would like to see in to future and all that jazz. Seriously, anything that comes to mind, this is Crack after all. The Mizuki question is still open and I have a very important question to as:

**Review responses:**

**Phantom666** Yes sir! I'm glad yoou think so highly of my work! ((gives you a Gaara-holding-a-leash-with-a-pouty-pissed-Sasu-chan-at-the-end-plushie))

**kma3000** Well, anything can happen. I'll keep that in mind, and eveytime I try and do romace, it turns out botched (If you read Kingdom Hearts, then take a look at my stories, Coming to terms, Fall to peices, and Steah Modnik (actually you could skip FTP, if you don't really wanna read the stories) to see what I mean. It is **botched**.) ANYway, thank you so much for the lovely suggestion, before I had even asked for one! ((gives you a Sasuke-Gaara-Haku-Naruto-Shika-Zabuza-Group-picture-plushie)) I hope you like it! I was not sre what to give you...

**The Lye** Hi again, dear loyal reviewer! I sooo know how you feel. but I have a little solution... XD ((gives you a SasUKE-dressed-up-'PET'-style-with-Gaara-holding-his-leash-and-a-ANTI-DUST-jutsu-plushie)) you like?

**Cyber-Porygon** Thak you so much! I'm glad you like it! I will do my very best to keep going, and would GREATLY appreciate any ideas that people are willing to provide!

**hanyou-samurai** Hello, loyal reviewer! Owari is just a 'that's all' or 'TBC' kind of thing. useful, iie? I'm trying to take care of the typos, it's driving me nuts too. I'm glad you liked the chappie! ((gives you a Shika-and-Sasuke-having-a-silent-conversation-while-everyone-watches-in-confusion-and-annoyance-plushie)) Bai-Bai!

**678yui-julie-and-kiki-kitten:** Oo soooooo...cute... Must obey the cute little animals... heehee Did you like the chapter? ((is compelled to give you plot-spoiler-Raccoon-Gaara-plushie)) XD

**k:** XD I'm glad! I will try and update faster, but I don't know what to do for the next chappie! I need plot help/suggestions things! TT

**  
**

**A moment of silence for Sarutobi Asuma**

**Loyal leaf ninja, Great and powerful man, and Chain-smoker**

**Review my pretties! Review!**

**.E ..E ..E ..E .** Kakki/Maria/Queen of the MEEP. **. 3.. 3.. 3.. 3.**


	6. G i N g E r B r E a D m A n

**On the Wings of Revenge **

**By:** Zeida and Maria (Maria)

**Warnings: **Insanity, crack, violence, blood, gore, plotholes, randomness, lack of plot to begin with, language etc... Etc...

**Disclaimer:** I don't own it.

**Summary:** Zabuza finds Naruto after Haku, and takes him away. This is half crack nuttiness. Vengeful!Naruto. It's starting to look like a foursome to me but it's _not_? Just brother love? Gaara, Haku, Naruto and Sasuke...nuttiness. Shikamaru shows a lot too! Have I proved myself nuts yet? Inspired by my own nutty-ness. 

**Warning!:** VERY CONFUSEING EVENTS PROCCEEDING! If you are confused AT THE END read the time line AT THE END. Bare with it until then, or you'll spoil the fun. 

ChApTeR sIx: Gingerbread Man

Sakura waited in boredom on the bridge where Team 7 always met up. Small to begin with, the team was now reduced to Kakashi and herself. That meant that she couldn't really do much of anything. Only D-rank missions and no raising rank until the next generation of genin graduates, and only then if the team numbers were uneven. She might get lucky and join up with a makeshift team that didn't manage to pass the chuunin exams, but that was pretty bad anyway.

How did this happen, how did she end up all by her lonesome, and so pathetic that her only use was gardening for the elderly?

Maybe her parents were right; she wasn't cut out for this sort of thing. The pink haired girl wasn't from a ninja family after all. Her parents couldn't help her, as they had no idea what to do, unlike so many other families of ninja. Her only teammate her age had half-betrayed Konoha (Not that the village knew, and that was probably for the best.), and she didn't even _try _to stop him.

The only good point to this whole thing was that Kakashi was really concentrating on training her. It wasn't like before, either, when Sasuke was there too. Then, he gave them something to work on, and read his book nearby, stopping them only if they were about to kill themselves or someone else.

Now, he was showing her exactly what to do, different exercises to bring her weak points up to par. He was standing nearby, watching her, correcting her every time she messed up, and patiently explaining the right way to do it.

Needless to say the first day this had happened, she demanded proof that he was indeed her sensei. Sakura knew she saw him wince in guilt, as he uncovered the Sharingan eye to prove his identity. He showed it to her every time that they met now, before getting started right away.

He was almost on time sometimes. Obviously, he had taken his student defecting personally.

But what was the point, really. She was improving, but the higher missions required teams, and she just didn't have one. Sakura knew she would get in the way if she tried to latch onto another, and didn't want to bring her comrades down with her.

Maybe she should just-

The silver haired sensei appeared just then, deftly flicking up his hitai-ate and letting it slide back down again.

"Yo." he greeted, putting a hand on her shoulder and teleporting them to the latest training ground that he picked out.

"Sorry I was late; I had to talk to the Hokage about urgent matters and entering you in the Chuunin exam."

Sakura looked at the tall man oddly. "Sensei..." She said slowly, wary of something, "You have to enter in cells of three... You know that."

The jounin nodded happily, his one visible eye curving. "Yep."

"As in not one."

"Yep."

"As in, there must be _more than one_!" the pink haired kunoichi growled.

"Yep."

"Sensei! I can't enter with just me!"

"Maa... I know that Sakura. It isn't going to be just you. To improve inter-village relations, you are going to be working with a team from sand that is lacking as well! The chuunin exams are base mostly on individual skill, so it doesn't really matter what your team is made of. Besides, a good kunoichi can work with any team she is assigned to. They've already agreed. You'll do fine."

Sakura gaped at him. "You did WHAT?"

"Put you with another lacking team so that you might have a chance at becoming chuunin, which you are fully capable of. Is that a problem?"

The kunoichi stared at him for a moment, her mouth opening and closing noiselessly. She closed her eyes and took a couple deep calming breaths before beaming at her sensei, a wide smile crossing her face. The jounin thought she might just tackle him, but the girl kept her poise and just asked one simple question.

"When do I meet them?"

-:- -:- -:-

"All right now, stop strangling your team mates Ino." Asuma reprimanded as Ino throttled Chouji and Shikamaru for some reason or another.

"I have some very important news to give you later. I want you to meet up at our usual training ground in two hours." He smiled at them, a little sinisterly with the cigarette clenched between his teeth, and vanished.

Ino sighed, having let go of the boys. "I need to go get ready. We might be going on another big mission." She turned in a huff, still insulted about the comment to her clothing choices.

Chouji frowned, rubbing his neck. "Do you think it's really going to be another big mission?" he asked his best friend.

"Might be. I'm going to the training ground early. I don't want to keep an eye on the time." Chouji nodded, but excused himself saying that he should stock up in case of a long term mission. The lazy boy shrugged, heading leisurely down to the training ground. Chouji might head over here later, if he finished on time, and they could relax a bit before their mission, or what ever it was.

"What? Didn't his team return?" Shikamaru froze as a voice hissed out from behind a nearby tree on the training ground. He carefully checked his weapons and suppressed his chakra, sending a tiny bit off in a random direction to give illusion that he was gone.

"Yes, sir. I checked his house, too, like you ordered. He is not there." another voice answered. This one sounded slightly afraid, and younger than the first. The first... the deer boy couldn't really place it. It sounded young-ish and very _old_ at the same time.

Their conversation however was very suspicious. Not that a trained ninja would think that any conversation _wasn't_. Thinking fast, Shikamaru analyzed what he had heard so far. They were talking about someone in a team, more likely than not a ninja team. From the sound of it, his team was out of the village, assuming that they were talking about someone from this village and not just deeming it safer to talk about someone from another village here, than there.

It seemed like his house was here, and that the person wasn't. Their voices were urgent, so it was important.

"What do you mean "He is not there"! I need him!" The first voiced hissed again. There was a small thump; the second voice had just been pressed against a tree.

Yup, important! The teams that had been on missions recently numbered six, to Shika's knowledge. The ones who returned so far were only three. The first two being his own and Kakashi's team and the third being an ANBU patrol unit. He and his team had all returned to their homes, as had Kakashi and Sakura. The dark haired boy was fairly certain that the ANBU had. He wasn't sure of the identities of three of the elite assassin group, but none of those were on the patrol team.

That left only one person that they could be talking about.

"Orochimaru-sama, I know you need him, but if you cannot find him, than you need to pick a different body to possess. You health must always come first, and if you do not appear healthy, than Suna will not support you in the invasion!"

Shikamaru couldn't help it, he gasped. A tiny, sharp intake of breath, but it was enough. Before he knew it, he was flying back ward through the air and crashed into a thick tree. The deer-boy coughed violently, winded.

"What do we have here?" The second voice spoke. Shikamaru looked up, identifying him as a tall silver haired boy in his late teens. His hair was in a pony tail and he leered evilly at the coughing boy through circular glasses.

What got him was that his captor seemed to be a Leaf nin!

"Hmmm... Did he hear everything, Kabuto?" The first voice appeared to be a grass nin with long black hair and...lipstick... Shikamaru looked at him oddly.

"Yes, sir." Kabuto... that was his name. He had called the man Orochimaru. Last he knew, that was the name of one of the legendary Sannin, who abandoned the village in search of immortality. That was bad. If he survived this, which the boy doubted more with every minute, then he needed to tell this to someone.

The 'grass nin' turned away, flapping his hand behind him in a bored fashion. "Take care of him."

The deer-boy's eyes widened as the traitor's hands began to shine with chakra. He dived to the side to avoid the blows, but they were too close, and Kabuto was a lot faster.

His last thoughts held only regret as the chakra scalpels ripped through him, and blackness consumed him.

-:- -:- -:- bwahahahaha!cliffhanger!I made myself sad -:- -:- -:-

"Now," Kurenai began, her students perched on kicking tree trunks or, in Shino's case, just standing next to it. "Something very important is about to begin. Do any of you know what it is? Any conversations that you might have over heard?"

Kiba waved his arm in the air enthusiastically, his teammates glancing at him with worry when he nearly toppled right off the trunk. "I know! I know! Pick me! It's the Chuunin exams coming up, right?"

Kurenai smiled at him, nodding. "Good job! Now did you two know as well?"

Hinata stuttered a vaguely positive answer with something to do with her father, and Shino nodded curtly.

"Excellent! Now, I am going to enter you three in, if you can pass my test. I want you to find out everything you can about these exams, work together, and bring your findings to me in ten minutes. Go!"

"Hai, Sensei!" The black haired woman smiled to herself as they took off immediately.

-:- -:- -:-

"I have decided to nominate you all for the chuunin exams this year!" crowed Maito Gai enthusiastically. Lee pumped his fist in to the air, echoing his teacher's energy, Even Neji looked ever-so-slightly excited, having a chance to be a show-off-y genius ass(A/N: Sorry, I DO NOT like early Neji.)

"You will need to train extra-hard, so that you may be prepared to show off your YOUTH!"

"How true!" his clone yelled. "You are indeed the Great blue Beast of Konoha! Gai-sensei!"

Tenten twitched, and Neji groaned, each recognizing the symptoms.

"Lee!"

"-Damn it..."

"Gai-sensei!"

"Not again!"

"Lee!"

"Um... sensei?"

"Gai-sensei!"

"You know you can't stop them, Tenten."

"Lee!"

"Yeah, but there's-"

"Gai-sensei!"

"Holy-" Neji stared, backing away from the oblivious couple in horror.

"See!?" Tenten squeaked, joining him.

"_Leeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee_!" Gai cried with his final breath as he was trample by... Shino, Hinata, and Kiba, who was giggling madly, and soon followed by a herd of disturbed ANBU.

"_Gai-sensei_!!" Called out his students in varied degrees of alarm and confusion. As the strange group ran off, Lee hoisted his dazed sensei up and started hollering about them being 'unyouthful'. Tenten started giggling and raced after the ANBU, soon followed by Neji. Gai, 'rejuvenated' by the idea of a youthful chase, took off as well with Lee close behind.

-:- -:- -:-

Asuma steadily grew more worried as the minutes passed and his student still didn't arrive at the meeting place. Ino had come and left again to check the missing boy's house for him. Chouji appeared soon after to inform them that Shikamaru had actually come early so he wouldn't have to keep an eye on the time. Once Ino returned, they would scour the area for the boy incase he had fallen asleep against a tree just out of sight or something. Normally, thought the worried jounin, we would just look, but I have a very bad feeling about this.

His cigarette lay forgotten, and burning up between his fingers.

"He's not at home." Ino told them, hopping down from a nearby tree. Asuma nodded, leaning off the tree and dropping the cigarette to the ground.

"All right," he said, stepping on it to put it out. "We split up and search the training ground. If you see anything strange -Anything- you are to report to the other two immediately and _stay out of sight_. Is that clear?"

His student nod quickly and all three shot up into the trees.

-:- -:- -:-

"Sakura, this is Temari and Kankuro of Suna. Temari-san, Kankuro-san, this is Haruno Sakura of Konoha."

Both sides nodded stiffly, watching the other like a hawk. Kakashi and the sand team's sensei, Baki, exchanged an annoyed look, and sighed.

"Play nice." The sand jounin ordered, walking off. His students turned away from Sakura in a snap, staring after their sensei in some odd mix of horror and extreme annoyance.

The silver haired Konoha Jounin joins him, nodding good bye to an owl-eyed Sakura. "Maa... Why not get some drinks and complain about them, Baki-san?"

"Sensei!"

Kankuro snickered, "Nice Sensei you've got!"

"Hmm. A fine idea, Kakashi-san."

"SENSEI!!"

Sakura snickered at them. "Looks like we're in the same boat, then."

"Looks that way..." Temari grumbled.

"No." Kankuro said, unusually loudly, "It looks like Konoha and Suna should get along! And would do a nice job of it too!" He smiled with benignity, well as much benignity and Kankuro in full makeup can smile.

Obviously, Sakura was a wee bit scared.

Temari glare at him, an obvious 'shut up!' hidden in there. The puppet user just grinned even wider.

"What? You don't agree, Temari? Wow, _Dad _doesn't either!"

"You father doesn't like Konoha? Why not?" Sakura said, genuinely curious. She was distracted suddenly, as all three had to dive out of the way.

They looked on, odd looks on their faces, and disturbed looks of recognition from Sakura. Ino and Chouji shot passed, looking upset. They were followed be a perturbed Kurenai, who was obliviously trailed by her team. Hinata, Kiba, and Shino were looking somewhat scared and were dogged closely by a group of ANBU. The pink haired kunoichi made a very confused face at that, but had very little time to think about it as Gai's team shot passed. Unconsciously, the two sand nin and the Leaf Kunoichi backed up another step. 'YOUTH' was screamed throughout the village.

The three watched as the motley procession passed, wondering what was going on. Temari opened her mouth, but all that came out was a screech of frustration as Kankuro took off after them.

Sakura blinked, then turned to Temari, who was rightfully fuming. "He does that kind of thing a lot, doesn't he?"

"Yes. Makes you wanna hit him doesn't it?"

"Kinda. You know, I read somewhere that it's bad for women not to act on such urges."

"Really? Well we must stay in our best health now, shouldn't we?"

"Yes, we really should."

"Y'know I'm really starting to like you!" the bond girl shouted as she took off after her wayward brother.

"Same to you!" Sakura ran after her, slightly slower and concentrating more on the implications of what Kankuro had said.

-:- -:- -:-

The mist team started to slow as a huge wooden gate came into view. Naruto and Gaara oohed and ahed, collecting odd stares from those who knew the hated the place. Haku smiled, and Sasuke tried not to think about the people that he had left behind. The mizu-bushin of Zabuza pretty much just ran with them, looking and acting disturbingly like a quieter Ebisu. Not that any of them have ever heard of Ebisu, let alone seen him.

At the gates they turned to each other, a note of seriousness in the air.

"All right, from here on out code name only. No exception." They all nodded, and walked up to the gate.

Inside, the more immature of the group proceeded to act pretty much like they did at the gate, oh, ah, and complain that Kiri was way better. Sasuke, still feeling a sort of attachment to the place, tried not to make known that he liked it a helluva lot better.

He looked back at the mizu-bushin following them, and wondered again how the heck all of this happened.

-:- -:- -:-

_**--Flashback; Mizukage's mansion--**_

_They watched as Haku left, then sat in silence, wondering what to do until he came back._

_"Hn... When did Zabuza-san-"_

_"Zabuza-SAMA!" Gaara and Naruto hollered, at their last nerve on the subject._

_"-become Mizukage?" Sasuke continued, ignoring them as usual._

_For a moment, they looked startled by the question, then launched into an excited story._

_"Well, at first we were all just missing nins-"_

_"High class one, remember!"_

_"And then, we went to visit Haku and Zabuza-sama's old home."_

_"We really wanted to-"_

_"and kept asking him."_

_"So he finally took us there."_

_"And it was really cool-"_

_"-but Zabuza-sama said it was a whole lot nicer when he was a kid."_

_"And not just the graduation test, so don't complain."_

_"The schools were better and-"_

_"-he said that a lot more people tried to become shinobi, "_

_"-and succeeded too! So don't complain."_

_"He said that the Mizukage was going to sea."_

_"I didn't now what that was..."_

_"I means he was getting fat and lazy and greedy!"_

_"And Old!" Gaara said it like it was the worst of obscenities._

_"So Zabuza-sama killed him!"_

_"I was real easy."_

_"He had a better time of it than fighting that silver haired Konoha nin"_

_"Kakashi-sensei."_

_"KAKASHI-BAKA!" Naruto hollered._

_"Anyway, then there wasn't anymore Mizukage, and no one knew."_

_"So he decided to pretend to be him for a bit, and fix a couple things"_

_"Just till people found out, you know"_

_"''Cept when they did."_

_"They wanted him to stay! "_

_"He was doing such a good job-"_

_"Of course!"_

_"Of course! Zabuza-sama isn't the battle crazy demon that everyone thinks he is."_

_"He's really nice!"_

_"He can take care of things if he wanted."_

_"He just likes to fight more..."_

_"So he told the village that they can't tell anyone that he was in charge-"_

_"And he goes off on missions a lot-"_

_"-'Cause he really does like a good fight."_

_Both boys grinned at Sasuke, having finished their... story. Sasuke blinked at them, attempting to absorb all he information._

_Keyword: attempting._

_"Alright... we should probably figure out the details for the genjutsu."_

_"Like...?" Gaara asked, drawing out the word._

_"There are four of us, and teams of three."_

_"Oh."_

_"Someone could be the sensei."_

_"Zabuza-san-"_

_"-SAMA!"_

_"-_sensei _is the sensei. It'll probably a Mizu-bushin, though."_

_Naruto pouted at him, and Gaara growled, though none objected. They would make him say it yet... _

_"Maybe someone stays behind?"_

_"No!"_

_"Summon pet?" Sasuke suggested._

_Blink. "Alright! I'll do it!" Gaara performed a couple signs, transforming into a raccoon with an abnormally long tail, and hopping onto Sasuke's lap._

_Who promptly shoved him off again. Undeterred, Gaara just hopped back up, digging his claws into the boy's leg. Frowning, the Uchiha gave in, ignoring him instead._

_"Okay, then, now that you've filled up on questions?" Naruto looked at Sasuke. He nodded. "Then we get down to business. Who wants ta be what?"_

_Hopping back to the floor, Gaara raised his hand in the air, waving it around. Naruto turned to him. "I vote Uke-chan be Shikaeshi!"_

_Naruto's mouth creased to a mock frown as he thought it over. He grinned in confirmation even as Sasuke muttered about not getting a say._

_"And his nickname can be 'Shika'!" The Uchiha stared at them in vague horror. _

_"No."_

_"Yes."_

_"And you can be Arashi!" Gaara decided, sort of telling Naruto._

_"No." Sasuke continued, ignoring to hyper redhead._

_"Yes." Naruto responded, not sure who he was talking to._

_"Arashi is a good Kiri name." Gaara said, _quite _sure who he was talking to: himself._

_"No."_

_"Hmmm... but what about Haku?"_

_"Yes."_

_"I like the sound of Chibi, personally."_

_"No."_

_"But I think that he might skewer me, so we must think of something with grace and dignity."_

_"Yes!"_

_"No!"_

_"So, how about Tane!" (1)_

_"YES!"_

_"But I can't think of anything for me..."_

_Both boys stopped their argument for a moment, looking at Gaara. Somehow, almost at the same time, they said, "Suishuu-shu."_

_Gaara stared at them. "NO!"_

_**--End Flashback--**_

-:- -:- -:-

Sasuke rolled his eyes at the memory, catching up with his new teammates, as he had fallen a foot or so behind.

"He's _**WHAT**_?!" shouted a strange voice.

The mist team fought every instinct to jump out of their skin at the sound of the loud voice exploding right next to them. They looked to the side discreetly to see themselves passing a dark alley.

Gaara hopped on Naruto's shoulder and turned to the alleyway to the right of them. There were two shadowy figures standing suspiciously in it, facing one another. The group swiftly and silently took themselves out of hearing range.

"Yes. Dead." said the other, much calmer voice. This one sounded young and smooth, where as the other had a strange, ambiguousness to it. It was impossible to say whether the man was in his thirties or his seventies. Which was really strange, that sort of thing should be easily distinguishable.

'Dead?' Naruto mouthed to Haku. Haku shrugged and signed him to be quiet.

"What. Happened." The old-young - almost serpentine, now that they heard it a second time- voice bit out. he seemed to be having trouble keeping his temper in check. The small group felt shivers run down their spines at the amount of killing intent coming off the man in waves.

The second,, younger one, sighed. "Just as I told you, he died. There was a mission, as I said, and it was mislabeled. C-rank became A-rank when rouge nin showed up and killed him." the man explained.

Sasuke felt as if a fist was clenching on his heart, yet at the same time he let out an inaudible sigh of relief. So... this man...men, obviously wanted him for something. But, they thought he was dead. This meant that the plan had been a success. He felt torn between running far away, and jumping for joy.

The others didn't feel as good about the situation. This was bad. What if the genjutsu flickered? What if someone canceled it? That man could take Sasuke away... Fear flooded tem at the very idea. Gaara himself thought he had a certain responsibility over Sasuke, as be had gotten him. He should protect him, right?

"Are you sure?" The first voice hissed "It wasn't false intelligence?" The second voice scoffed.

"Would I give you false intelligence?" it asked, sounding almost hurt.

It was the fist voices turn to scoff now. "Treachery works both ways, Kabuto, and I'm not one to take chances."

-:- -:- -:-

"Sensei!" Chouji's panicked voice came through the walkie-talkie. "Come here! Quickly!" There was a trace of a sob in his voice that made the jounin feel sick. What had happened?

Asuma made his way over the coordinates on the GPS and hopped down beside his student, who ran to him, instantly, and dragged him over to where they could see one single, white hand through the bushes. The smoker felt like he was about to be physically sick, but didn't let it show on his face as he moved toward the bush, wary of traps.

Finding none, he parted the branches to reveal the stark white body of his missing student surrounded in a pool of his own blood.

"Chouji, don't come any closer. Call Ino and head to the hospital. Alert the medics that we have an emergency. Go!"

The terrified boy nodded shakily and took off as fast as Asuma had ever seen him, pulling out his walkie talkie and setting the frequency as he was moving.

The jounin turned back to his student, pulling out bandages and assessing the damage. The boy as still alive-thank Kami-sama- but he was barely breathing. There were sharp deep gashes all over him, but, by the amount of blood, most were done after he had lost so much that he had been knocked out. Carefully and as gently as possible, Asuma bandaged him up, if only to keep him from falling apart at this point. Lifting Shikamaru tenderly in his arms the grim jounin teleported to the hospital.

-:- -:- -:-

Having dragged Sasuke as far away from the voices as they felt safe, Gaara, Naruto and Haku slowed to a stop, the brunet finally dropping his hold on the back of Sasuke' shirt.

"That was creepy!" Naruto complained. "We DEFINATLY don't have people like that in Kiri."

"WhatEVER." Sasuke growled, rubbing his sore throat. "Would you stop comparing them?"

Naruto hmphed (2) and Gaara quipped that he still liked Konoha, which was forcefully rebuked.

Haku was just abut to step in to prevent another fist fight breaking out when they all had to duck for cover from what looked like a shinobi parade. Sasuke recognized Chouji and Ino leaving, looking upset. He got up to try and follow them, but was pulled back out of the way from Kurenai and she nearly trampled him. She was followed by her own, very panicked looking team. Then ANBU...

And two men in green spandex -Gaara started screeching "GREEN!" and had to be restrain from chasing and being trampled as well.-

Followed by two genin, a very pretty girl, and a very pretty boy, who were shouting out names that probably belonged to the two green men or the demons and monster that they were damning them to.

Then Sasuke recognized his own former team mate, Sakura, working with a Suna girl to try and Catch the Suna boy that was just ahead of them, and... chasing the group in front.

Needless to say, the four boys followed. One, concerned for his friends, one with a creepy obsession with green, the others trying, and failing to catch them before they end up doing something incredibly stupid.

-:- -:- -:-

"KURENAI-SENSEI!" The red-eyed jounin turned in surprise to the sound of the panicked yells of her students. Was _Shino _yelling? That was the loudest she's ever heard him.

The two ninja and the kunoichi skidded to a halt and thrust a sheaf of papers at her before darting behind her for cover. _Kiba _was _hiding_?

"What's wrong? I- oh!" She looked back, seeing the actually slightly tired looking ANBU unit... followed by Gai's team... followed by two _sand _nin and a pink-haired Konoha kunoichi she knew to be Sakura... followed by three _mist _nin?!... And a... raccoon with one heck of a tail.

Kurenai blinked. And blinked again. "What the _hell _did you three do?"

"Well.. um.. you see...

_**--Flashback; Training field 12-- **_

_"Hai, sensei!"_

_As the three took off, they signaled to each other with basic hand signs, planning out their course of action on the move. _

_'Kurenai-sensei has only given us ten minutes. We need one or only a few sources with a large amount of data.' Shino signed to the other two._

_'Where is a place where they would have people talking about the exam?' Hinata asked, silently._

_'They probably finished that, we need their documents.' Kiba decided._

_'Archives.' Shino pressed._

_'They are in the Hokage tower.' Hinata said, a little worried, 'We cannot go to them, we would get in trouble.'_

_Kiba grinned to his teammates. "Trouble, here we come!" he said out loud, as he sped up along the roof tops._

_Shino sighed, restraining the urge to sound like an old classmate. ''Those are last words, Kiba, you should not say them while heading into danger.''_

_'Oh, come on! All we have to do is steal a couple papers! They already finished planning, so no one will miss them.' Kiba signed, feral grin still in place._

_'Kiba-kun! We cannot steal them! That is wrong!' Hinata signed back to him._

_'Yeah, well, so was Shino being pissy and making us and Kurenai-sensei itch for a month when he got sick and couldn't go on a mission with us. It didn't stop him!'_

_Shino looked away, muttering something about being left out, and canceling a mission. Kiba snorted and Hinata giggled._

_The stopped in front of the tower, Hinata setting up a genjutsu to hide them from prying eyes. Shino sent a couple of his kikai on every level to find the archives. _

_Kiba sat there twitching in anticipation until he could go to work._

_"I've found it." Shino whispered, releasing an insect that looked a bit like a damselfly to lead Kiba there. It flew off, up the wall, with the Inuzuka and puppy following, sticking to the wall with chakra. They clambered up it on all fours._

_Once in the window on the right floor, the boy and his dog followed the little bug down the hall, past ninja and clerks, and secretaries that didn't notice a thing. It got a bit iffy after passing the ANBU guard in front of the doors that he wanted, but the man just let out an odd snore and went back to sleep, standing up. Geez, those advanced ninja learned the strangest things._

_"Whew." Kiba whispered, looking around the shelves for something of use. The little kikai flew around the books and scrolls and Akamaru sniffled around for one that had been made or modified recently._

_The black haired boy jumped a foot in the air when he felt the kikai land in his ear and bite him, rather effectively gaining his attention._

_"What?!" he hissed, rubbing his ear. The little insect fluttered around, aiming for a different row. "Aka! Guard the door. If someone's coming in, let me know. If they see you, _don't make noise_. Trip them up and come to get me." Kiba ordered. The puppy nodded with determination, walking purposely to the door and staring at it._

_The kikai led Kiba to a row of books that were covered with dust, save for one right near the edge. The genin grabbed it, after checking for traps and looked it over. Finding what he wanted, he waved Aka over and they snuck back out, unfortunately, the guard had moved a bit and the door swung open into his nose._

_"Uwarg! Who's there!?" He looked around, spotting the boy running down the hall with a thick book in hand._

_"Attention! ANBU to stations! Small black haired brat has stolen a thick book from the archives!" he yelled into his walkie-talkie. There was a yell from down the hall. _

_"Hey! Who are you calling a brat?!" The man ignored him, rubbed his nose grumpily and took off after Kiba, who had just jumped out the window, yelling "RUN!!!"_

**--End Flashback--**

"Okay," said Kurenai. "Lemme get this straight. _Hinata _helped _steal_ something?!"

-:- -:- -:-

"His injuries are severe, but he will live. I can't say how well he will recover at this point... and I'm not sure he should use chakra anymore."

"I... see. Why can't he use chakra?" Asuma couldn't stop staring guiltily at the pallid boy in the hospital bed that looked too big for him.

"Well, the medics think that he _shouldn't_, you see. It's just that we aren't sure what would happen, but most think that he would be like a hemophiliac, except with chakra."

"What are his injuries. Can you tell what happened?"

"The first two blows knocked him out. You're either dealing with a mad man... or a very skilled medic nin. The attacked stabbed him in the area just below his stomach and here, above his heart. He sent out a wave of concentrated chakra. That what knocked him out. Unfortunately, it burned open all his chakra pathways right into his reserve. It must have been a massive wave. That's why he shouldn't use it. I would probably just keep coming, depleting, and therefore killing him, and likely taking out anyone else near him at the time as well.

"What I can't figure out is that the foreign chakra seemed to have _pooled _there, that or this boy had a part of his reserve blocked off or had two of them, which just... doesn't happen.

"After that... the attacker seemed to have... that is tried to..."

"_What?"_

"D-dissected him.. Alive. Unconscious and just cut him opened! Just had a peek at his insides or something!" The nurse shuddered violently, nearly hysterical, and ran out of the room. Asuma could feel the vein in his temple throbbing.

Oh, if he _ever _found out who did this...

"There is going to be _nothing left_ of him when I'm done...!"

-:- -:- -:-

Owari

-:- -:- -:-

(1) Sorry, can't remember. Who anyone like to be wonderful and look it up? My dictionary died.

(2)This was auto-corrected to 'humped'... XD

A/N: first things first:

Timeline: 

Kakashi meets with Sakura(ain't he weird?)

Asuma Team meets to tell students to meet later (heehee)

Kabuto attack Shika(I SOWY!!!!!!!!!!!!! TT.TT)

Kurenai give...mission to students(That was too much fun)

Kiba team steal stuff(XD)

Shika found(sniff)

Chou and Ino head to hospital(whimper)

Kurenai sees and follows(erm, she worried 'bout Asuma, doesn't know what happened yet)

Gai announces exam to students(That was fun.)

Gai trampled by Shino team and ANBU(That, even more so)

Gai team chase(THE CHASE OF YOUTH!)

Hinata team see Kurenai chasing someones and try to catch up(There getting a little scared now)

ANBU follow(see why?)

Gai team Follow(see?)

Sasuke team get to gate(Flashback)

Gingrbreadman proccesion Pass Sakura and Sand team

Kankuro chase(_see?)_

Temari and Sakura chase him(see!?)

Pass Sasuke Gaara Haku and Naruto

Confused, Sasuke see scared Chou and worried(sobWAHHHH!)

They follow(**SEE?!** yeah, reason to be scared.)

---------------

I hope that helped. And yes, that s what my planning looks like most of the time, typos and all!.

Now: second of all: I ADORE SHIKA AND IT TORE ME UP WRITING WHAT HAPPENED!!!!! sniff sob

As the nurse said, he will be okay, the chakra prob was a spur of the moment thing, and it could be special, or not. Up to you, loyal readers! Vote on it. Now. 

He will be fine to go to the exams and I have one more poll for y'all, and **THIS ONE ISA VERY IMPORTANT. I cannot continue the story with out your opinion.**** Should Kabuto die **_**sooner**_** or **_**later**_**? IT DOES CHANGE THINGS DIRASTICALLY!**(sp)

**Reveiw Replies(If I forget yours TELL ME!)**

RobotPirateNinja: Bwahahahahaha... do you like the... plot twist? ((laughs maniacally and gives you aSasuke-dressed-up-as-Cap'n-Jack-Sparrow-from-PotCII-with-his-loyalties-all-confoozled!-plushie)) wow... that was random... No... you must VOTE!

678yui-julie-and-kiki-kitten: XDDDD that was too much fun to write. Actually,me and Zeida acted that part out, trying to figure out how it went. ((give you a Zeida-and-Maria-acting-that-particular-scene-out-as-Haku-and-Zabuza-watch-in-amusement-as-they-suck-at-it!-plushie)) Yeah... hope you like! ((hipnotised you))VOTE!

Naruto's Mask This soon enough? Hope you like the chappie, now vote!

Phantom666 You're so nice ta little old me! here's another for your shrine! ((gives you a nice shiney Gaara-and-Naruto-cosplaying-as-royalty-god-thingies-and-tring-to-look-regal-plushie)) You like? 'Member to vote!

BattleStationsHello, again! They're doing pretty well, I think. Do you like the plot twst? ((gives you a Gaara-Haku-Naruto-Sakuke-and-Shika-all-tied-up-with-plot-strings-and-surrounded-by-plot-bunnies-plushie.)) Dont ask where that came from... XD Vote on the poll!

Golden Typhoon Thanks, Vote!

makacatori Why, thank you. I hope this is soon. ((gives you cute-overly-curious-Gaara-poking-a-large-and-commonly-accociated-with-danger-animal-plushie)) Remembah to VOTE!

Dark InuyoukaiThank you vey much, you are sweet. Thabk for the reveiw! ((Gives you grinning-Naruto-chan-plushie to match you delightful enthusiasm)) Vote-ish, please!

All righty, I'm good now. My chapters are getting freakish, and I apologize for that. As usual, any ideas you would like to submit, are most welcome. It adds color to the story. XD

_Shikaeshi- Revenge_

_Arashi- Storm, also rumored to be the Yondaime's name)_

Sayonara, for now.

**Reviews are my Energy Drink!**

**.E ..E ..E ..E . Kakki/Maria/Queen of the MEEP. . 3.. 3.. 3.. 3.**


	7. R e C o V e R y

**On the Wings of Revenge **

**By:** Zeida and Maria (Maria)

**Warnings: **Insanity, crack, violence, blood, gore, plotholes, randomness, lack of plot to begin with, language etc... Etc...

**Disclaimer:** I don't own it.

**Summary:** Zabuza finds Naruto after Haku, and takes him away. This is half crack nuttiness. Vengeful!Naruto. It's starting to look like a foursome to me but it's _not_? Just brother love? Gaara, Haku, Naruto and Sasuke...nuttiness. Shikamaru shows a lot too! Have I proved myself nuts yet?

ChApTeR SeVeN: Recovery

As the mist nins caught up to the now stationary parade, Sasuke noticed that they had stopped outside of a hospital.

And that Chouji had disappeared inside.

Kurenai was standing right outside the doors, talking to a severely hysterical Ino, and trying to calm her down. Her team was hiding behind her and the ANBU were repeatedly trying to take them away, only to be scared away, temporarily, by their Sensei. The poor woman was getting increasing irritated and was quite capable of frightening them.

The man clad in green was congratulating his team, very loudly, for having kept up with 'the high-speed chase of YOUTH'. Haku could restrain Gaara no longer and he lunged.

"GREEN!" he crowed, knocking both Lee and Gai to the ground in a tremendous hug. He more securely latched himself onto Lee as both started to struggle, nuzzling his face into the terrified boy's jumpsuit. Gai managed to detach himself and quickly scooted away, staring at the small red-head that had appeared out of no where.

"Lee! The strange red creature has consumed my Lee!" he cried in horror. Tenten and Neji blinked at the boy, clearly not seeing the same thing as their Sensei.

"Gai-sensei. He is hugging him." Neji deadpanned. Tenten giggled.

The mist team stared at Gaara, wondering what to do. If they didn't do anything, then they could just say he was part of another team and get away with their cover unblown. But they had to rescue that one kid before he was traumatized for life. And one of the people that was with Sasuke when they... uh... liberated him was there, and she could turn around any minute now. Not that Haku thought she could see through the tears.

Actually, that was the girl that Naruto had gotten attached to. The blond was looking at her with undisguised concern, but didn't do anything for fear of blowing their cover worse.

"Say that he's not on our team, but agree that he is from Kiri." Sasuke hissed as he made a quick, and slightly better than usual genjutsu of panda-Gaara, before he ran toward the doors of the hospital.

"Why -hic- is everyone _following _me?" Ino sobbed to Kurenai, having calmed down enough to talk.

Kurenai looked at the rest of the entourage, raising an eyebrow. "I couldn't tell you. Now, what I want to know is WHY WON"T YOU BACK OFF, ALREADY!" The jounin screeched at the ANBU yet again trying to make off with her students. "I am their instructor, I _told_ them to gather information!"

"Ma'am, they may be enemies disguising themselves! They just stole a lot of information on the exams! What if there's an invasion! (M/N: Don't you love Dramatic Irony? Btw, an M/N is a Maria note...) We have to have a professional check them for genjutsu!"

Team 8 stiffened in indignation behind their Sensei and the black haired woman directed concentrated killing intent of the ANBU. They stepped back slightly, ready to fight. She might have been in on it.

No, they are not paranoid! Just terribly, terribly alert.

"Shut up!" Kiba poked his head out from behind his Sensei, startling her for a moment. "Kurenai-sensei is the best there is on genjutsu!"

"Agreed. If she does not believe that we have a genjutsu on ourselves, then we do not." Shino joined his teammate, also stepping out from the red eyed woman.

"Yes!" Hinata squeaked. She too revealed herself, though anyone could see that she was scared. "And- and if you do not leave us alone... I-I will have to s-speak to my f-father about you! I'm s-sure that he would n-n-not like this at all!" The group of ANBU looked at her, freezing when they saw that she was the daughter of the leader of the most prominent and important ninja family in Konoha at the moment.

"Er... I guess your right." Said their leader. "Of course, since your Sensei believes it was you... and we wouldn't want ... no not at all." he muttered and they retreated. No sense in making your wallet mad at you.

"My god, that was pathetic." Naruto murmured to Haku. Said boy just looked delighted that such an obviously shy girl stood up for herself and her teammates.

_Konoha was a regular breeding ground for sweeties,_ he thought. _That's Naruto-kun, Uke-kun, and her, too! _(Yes, Haku _did_ include Sasuke, and he _did_ just call him that!)

"Hinata that was- was- awesome!!" Kiba crowed, hugging her. He practically lifting her off her feet, and swinging her around in circles, but didn't really get the chance.

But she got the picture that he was happy with her.

"GYAAAAH!" A terrified yell ripped through the air, attracting everyone's attention. Large blades made up of air sliced the ground, causing the shinobi to dive out of the way.

"Go, Temari-chan! Show him who's boss!" The Konoha ninja jumped as a familiar voice cheered on the creator of the wind blades. What was the village coming to?

The blonde girl grinned, swinging her fan again at her little brother, who was doing his best to dodge. "Ha, ha! Thanks, Sakura-chan! Are you getting this?"

The pink haired kunoichi grinned at her new friend, raising the video camera to follow Kankuro's latest escape route.

And brought it back again as he was foiled.

"C'mon, girls! I just wanted to see where they were going! Gyak! Now calm- eep! Alright, alright! I'm sorry already!" The kabuki painted genin howled as he tried to escape his pursuers.

The surrounding people watched with wide eyes as the Sand nin seemed to turn against each other and the, rather random, Konoha teammate taped it and cheered them on. They didn't think this is quite what the Sandaime had in mind when he promoted inter-village relationships.

"Um... Sensei? What are they doing?" Tenten asked Gai.

"I do not know. But the strange red creature has been distracted. We must strike!" Neji rubbed the bridge of his nose in annoyance and signaled to the Chinese-dressed girl to grab Lee. He went up to his teacher, before he could do something stupid - probably involving a pole - and pointed at a building far in the opposite direction.

"Look. There is that silver haired moron that you call your rival discussing ways to one-up you with a sand ninja." He said in a bored drawl. Gai spun around so fast that his students, well really just Tenten, as Lee was distracted, and Neji... just didn't, were worried that he may have gotten whiplash.

"Rival Kakashi!!!!! How could you!" He howled disappearing is a speedy trail of smoke and manly** (1) **tears. Neji followed as did Tenten, with Lee slung over her shoulder and Gaara left in the dust, wailing. The small red head leapt up and tackled Haku, who comforted him.

"Greeeeeen... -hic- my green..." he sniffed.

"There, there." The black haired boy soothed. "It will be okay. There will be other greens."

Naruto groaned at the thought. "This village is insane!" He turned his attention back to the team that seemed to have started all of this. They looked to be congratulating the timid looking girl.

"Hinata, that was a very clever bluff!" Their sensei was saying, patting her on the back. The dark haired dog-boy was bouncing up and down yelling about how the 'stupid ANBU-wanna-bes' had been scared off by 'super-Hinata'. He stopped periodically to glomp **(2)** her again, or act out a random part. The last genin just seemed to be a pillar. Naruto wondered if he knew how to react in these situations. The boy smelled slightly nervous, and unsure, but he was happy with his teammate.

They all were.

Suddenly, the blond genin grinned, and he walked up to the stoic boy. "Hey, that was a pretty cool thing that your friend did. You must be proud."

The boy turned to him, nodding. "Yes. Hinata-san is a powerful asset to this team. I am glad that she is here." Naruto almost laughed out loud when he saw the girl. Her face lit up as bright as a tomato! She was stuttering something that sounded like thanks.

Sort of.

If you looked at it side ways.

Well, it couldn't be anything else.

Naruto slapped Shino on the back, sending him stumbling forward, and went back to Haku and Gaara, who had calmed down, and sat on the ground. All the fun was over now, team 8 was leaving, the ANBU and the green team had already, and the pink girl, -Sakura?- with the camera and her friends had already moved away.

"Where is S-Shikaeshi? Should we be worried?" Naruto asked.

"No. He went into the hospital to find out what happened. I believe that we should wait here." Haku nodded to himself, reinforcing his words.

Gaara yawned transforming into a raccoon again and curling up on Naruto's lap. The blond petted him, patiently waiting for their last teammate to return.

-:- -:- -:-

Sasuke easily snuck past the nurses and doctors. They were not trained to deal with his skill. Although they could work on a battlefield, Konoha had always been low on actually medically trained ninja. He tried to track down Chouji by his chakra to find the source of the problem, but the boy was just sitting in the waiting room. The nuke-nin walked over to him and easily asked him what was wrong. It was a pretty good excuse as the poor boy was having a mini break down.

The chubby boy looked at him oddly, attempting a half smile.

Just so you know, it didn't work

"Nothing too bad. Well, not really. I'm mean, it's not unusual for ninja to end up in a hospital, right?" he tried to laugh but it came out as a strangled sob. Sasuke tried not to let his worry show on his face,.

_You are in disguise. Just a sympathetic ninja._

_Someone from another village all together._

_Ninja don't have emotions anyway!_

"Who was it? Did you have a big mission?" he asked, trying to sound like he didn't know him.

_And to sound like he didn't think it was his other friend that the orange haired boy was here for..._

"No. He was attacked in here. That was the worst. We didn't know he was in danger. It's our own village damn it!" Chouji yelled, jumping up from his seat in a fit of rage. He slumped back down fairly quickly, energy gone again.

Sasuke pulled a bag of jerky from his pack and offered it to the frightened boy. He raised his eyebrow, like he always did when he had to comfort Chouji, and pushed the bag towards him. It wasn't chips, but it would do for now. The Akamichi stared at it for a second before grabbing and wolfing it down. "Thanks, Sasuke...- WHAT!" Chouji dropped the bag and spun to the next seat to find it empty again.

"What is _happening _to me...?" the chubby boy sighed, rubbing his head and reaching for the jerky again. He was going nuts.

Sasuke ran upstairs again, breathing fast. _How did he find out? _

On the way he had checked several mirrors, the jutsu was still in place, his hair still very blue and face darker, if only slightly. It was even a different shape. So, how did Chouji know? Damn it. He must have slipped and said something that sounded like himself.

Passing one of the rooms, Sasuke felt Asuma's chakra. It was flaring out and shrinking back with barely any control. The man was furious. Peeking the door open slightly, Sasuke could hear a slight groaning of someone waking up.

"What... happened to me?" Shikamaru asked. Was that his voice? It was so hoarse.

"You were attacked." Asuma whispered, hoping to keep the boy calm, though he himself was not. "The doctors say you will be fine. Do you remember anything?" He neglected to mention the chakra.

Shikamaru look up "No." He blinked. That was not what he had meant to say. He tried again, "No!"

Asuma looked at him, confused. "Shikamaru? What is it? Does anything hurt?"

"It's..." he trail off. The deer boy zoned out, the room fading around him as he tried to figure out what was happening to him. Asuma caught him as he fell back in a dead faint.

_**--Flashback; forest--**_

_Shikamaru blearily opened his eyes, his whole body felt like it was on fire. There seemed to be a man standing over him, muttering. Why was that? It was on the tip of his brain, but still out of sight. It hurt to much to think._

_"Strong nin... work for us... " The deer-boy couldn't quite make out what he said, and nothing was making any sense to him. Who was the man? He seemed oddly familiar._

_"Weak... die..." the man started to laugh, his voice becoming clearer and louder. "Then, I'll have more corpses to play with!"_

_Shikamaru shuddered, his lethargic brain realizing that he was not in good hands. He tried to move away, but only caused spasms of pain to shoot through his body._

_The man was the one who knocked him out, what was his name? He noticed his consciousness and laughed again, pressing on something that made Shikamaru want to scream, but he couldn't._

_"You can't fight me, you know. There's a seal._

_"I like this seal. Do you know what it means? It means you can't rat me out! That is, if you even live that long._

_"Better yet, the smarter you are, the less you can do about it. The less you can say." He laughed again, sticking something into him, and he blacked out again. __**(3)**_

_**--End Flashback--**_

Shikamaru sat bolt upright on the bed, staring at his Sensei, who pressed him gently back again. The boy shook him off and stared at Asuma, scared.

"Did you remember anything? Do you know who did it?" the man asked.

"I... don't remember... I don't remember..." he shook his head. There _had _to be a way to get his attention. He did remember, damn it! The boy looked up at his sensei, willing him to realize what was happening, that he wasn't being allowed to speak. "_Help."_

Asuma shuddered invisibly at the panic in his students voice. He was trying to tell him something. It was important. "Can you... write it down?" He asked, jumping for a bit of scroll and a pencil. Shikamaru took them and started to write, very quickly and messily. Then his hand stopped and started to shiver. It hovered right over the page, but it was obvious he could write no more.

Asuma took the paper, looking it over. "Damn it..." he hissed and dropped it. Shika looked away ashamed. "No, _not_ you. It's- just calm down. I'll find out how to fix this."

Sasuke, still listening through the door, watched as the scrap of paper floated to the ground, landing face up.

'Didn't want to keep an eye on time. Left to training ground early. Someone-two- were there. talking ,plotti-'

The last Uchiha-that-mattered pushed the door open fully, startling the occupants, and picked up the paper. "I apologize." he told them, looking up and bowing slightly. "I could not help but hear you. If you do not mind, I would like to ask what happened?" He smiled in a perfect imitation of Haku. The black haired boy had said he would need to be able to smile nicely one day and made him practice.

"What are you doing here?" Asuma got up and demanded, despite that Sasuke had just told him. "You have no right. Leave."

Sasuke turned to Shikamaru, completely ignoring the older man. "My name is _Shika_eshi." His Haku smile transformed into a smirk as Shikamaru's eyes widened.

"You can call me _Shika_, if you wish." The deer-boy was doing a fish impression now, his mouth opening and shutting wordlessly. Asuma, however was on the edge of losing it.

"Get -" he reached out to grab him and shove him out of the room.

"Sasuke!" Shika grinned, sitting up again, and trying to stand. The smoking man froze, staring at the neon blue haired boy(was it a boy?) in front of him.

_Sasuke was the one that Kabuto and the snake sannin were after! He could warn him, or tell him to remain in disguise and get out of here._

"..." Shikamaru tried to call his name again, only to find that it wouldn't come out. "No..." he collapsed to the ground, holding his head. He had just _ruined_ his chance to save Sasuke because his brain worked to fast. This was a curse, damn it a curse! There was nothing good about his intelligence. It was his only blessing that so many believed that he was just a lazy imbecile. That way they wouldn't ask him something, and he would, suppose, give them potentially_ fatally lacking _information. "Damn it, no."

Both Asuma and Sasuke crouched next the dark haired boy in worry. "Shika? What happened to you? Who did this?" the Sharingan wielder asked. He was border edge panicking at the sight of one of his friends swathed in bandages like a mummy. Asuma sighed, and briefed him on what they knew. He guessed that if his student thought it was Sasuke, it probably was. The Uchiha nodded, trying to figure out what they could do.

"You can't talk about what happened, but you can remember." Sasuke stated.

His friend nodded quickly, forcing himself to think about... food, monkeys **(6)**, _any_thing but what happened. That way he might be able to tell them something.

Suddenly, and idea hit the deer boy. He was able to nod, his correct response, when he wasn't thinking fast, or his thoughts were impaired. So... "Meltdown." he said.

His audience's eyes went wide, Asuma shaking his head vigorously and Sasuke was not even able to respond to such an absurd statement.

"No." both said finally. But the black haired boy didn't look like he was paying then any attention anymore.

"There are the chuunin exams coming up!" Sasuke said, getting desperate as Shikamaru closed his eyes.

"It won't help! We can figure this out!" Asuma agreed. The lazy genius was taking deep breaths, preparing himself.

"Nonononono! It- but, Stop!" The deer-boys eyes had scrunched up, his thoughts going a thousand times faster than they usually do. His brain getting to a point where it couldn't keep up with itself. The genin silently asked himself hard, or unanswerable questions, analyzing behavior and pushing himself to absurd conclusions. He confused himself, purposely messing his thoughts up in the middle and having to go over all of them again, to figure out why something didn't make sense. He tried to disturb himself, imagining frighteningly real worlds inside his own head, instantly creating an entire history of them, along with everything he never wanted to happen. All to aid in tiring and freaking himself out.

"Damn it!" Asuma sighed as his student slumped over. The boy's mind couldn't take the stress and denial any longer and shut down. The jounin picked him up and put him gently back on the bed. "Damn it." he said to himself again.

Shikamaru opened his eyes again fairly quickly. He sat bolt up right in the bed, then doubled over groaning as he strained his injuries.

"Shika! How do you feel?" Sasuke asked, leaning in. The boy's head shot up again and he stared at his friend and his teacher like a... deer caught in headlights. Fancy that.

"When did you get here?!" he exclaimed, he scooted backwards, almost tumbling right off the end of his bed.

"Um..." a bead of sweat dripped down Asuma's cheek, "We were here since before you woke up..."

Shikamaru gave them a sheepish half-grin. "Uh.. sorry. Who are you?" he asked Sasuke. "Because you seem really familiar, but I don't know anyone with zappy blue hair."

"Electric blue." the nuke-nin corrected him with a sigh. He hated when this happened, but this was the first time the ass had done it to _himself_.

"Yeah, yeah, Sasuke. Don't be so troublesome, and tell me who you are!" Asuma groaned and eyed the hard wall longingly. _3,2,1..._he counted down to himself. It was so annoying dealing with him like this.

"Oh! You're Sasuke! Why are you in my room?" he realized finally.

And half incorrectly.

"We aren't." Sasuke said patiently.

"Yes we are."

"No."

"Then why was I sleeping here?" The slightly brain dead boy asked triumphantly.

"Because, Shika, you sleep everywhere. We are in the hospital. You got attacked. You gave yours-" The normally bird haired boy's eyes widened in realization and he pulled Asuma out of his friend's hearing range. "Asuma-sensei. He did that to lower his brain power. He can't think quickly anymore, and he was trying not to before. Think quickly, that is.

"He remembers, but he can't talk about it. He said my name, but then he couldn't after that."

Asuma nodded, thinking hard. "Hai. Perhaps you had something to do with what happened to him. He must not have connected it when he first realized that it was you."

"That must be why he gave himself a meltdown."

"But he still has all the information that he knew. He just can't connect it.

So he'll answer unconsciously if we ask him questions." Sasuke stood and made his was back to his friend with Asuma. "Why can't you tell us what happened to you after you went to the training grounds early." he asked quickly. He would probably only have one chance at this.

"Evil seal" the deer boy answered automatically.

"An evil seal?" Asuma asked. So that was it. It wasn't back mail or a hostage situation. Good.

"What?" Shikamaru asked, looking at his teacher oddly.

"You just said you have an evil seal on you." Sasuke clarified, looking slightly confused. He was actually very, very confused, but managed to hide most of it.

"No, I didn't."

"Yes, you did!"

"Did what?"

"Gyah!" Sasuke lunged for the other boy in pure frustration and was barely held back by the older man. To tell the truth, Asuma _really_ wanted to let go right now. But he had to be nice, it was his student, and he was injured.

"Hold on. It's just not letting him talk about it again. I know someone who can fix this. Stay here with him?" Asuma asked. Sasuke smirked dangerously and nodded. Shikamaru backed away, frightened. "Without killing, maiming, or otherwise harming him?"

The smirk vanished to something that looked dangerously like a pout. But Uchiha don't pout. They look reproachful, but they don't pout.**(4)**

"Fine." Sasuke muttered. "I won't kill, maim, or whatever."

-:- -:- -:-

Asuma walked out of the hospital to Hokage tower. He needed to ask his old man about one of his students. Normally, he wouldn't waste time like this, but he didn't even know what the man looked like. Pretty sad, considering it was his father's students, and they were famous at that.

_Wow, that's pretty low_, he thought as he passed the hot springs. There was an old man there, peeking through a knot hole in the wood. Normally, he supposed, he would try and stop him, but this was too important.

So he would just alert the ladies and let them take care of it. "EEEW! There's a pervert!" he squealed in a high pitched falsetto. The old man at the fence spun around in horror as shrieks began to emit from the hot spring, but the jounin had already disappeared into the crowd.

At the Hokage tower, the receptionist was dripping with honey as he lead Asuma to his father's office. Quite literally. It seems that one of the academy students had been particularly malevolent this morning and drenched an entire room, and most of its inhabitants, in honey. The man was boring the jounin stiff as he complained endlessly about the 'little whelp'. Probably his nephew, now that he thought about it.

"I should thank you, but you were talking awful lowly about my poor nephew..." Asuma muttered, rather nastily, as he entered the Hokage's office. The secretary looked abashed, but he didn't care. He was pissed right now, and wanted to take it out on everyone.

"Ah, Asuma. How are you?" The aging man asked his son pleasantly.

"One of my students is hospitalized." The younger man said bluntly.

The Hokage looked horrified and stood from his desk to be able to speak more confidentially. "What happened? You had no missions lately. Do you need any of my help?"

The jounin nodded, glad that his father was moving so quickly. "Hai, your help would be nice. Nara Shikamaru was attacked on the training grounds within the village, and was seriously injured. He will make a full recovery, except for some chakra problems. He has a seal placed on him-" The Hokage's eyes widened."- that prevents him from speaking about what happened. The frog hermit **(5)** should be able to reverse it except... ah-"

"You don't know where he is." The Sandaime finished for him, his face serious. Asuma nodded. "You are lucky, Jiraiya's in town right now. I should be able to find him quite easily."

The black haired man sighed, Shikamaru was going to be okay.

-:- -:- -:-

"What?!" Asuma squawked, eyes bulging in horror. He pointed rather rudely at the white haired man standing in front of him "_That's_ the frog hermit, Jiraiya-sama of the legendary sannin?! He's a pervert!"

The Sandaime sighed dejectedly as Jiraiya, clearly unimpressed by his titles, cleaned his nails with a kunai. "Yes. That is him. Jiraiya, could you do us a favor?" he asked.

"Depends. Does it have to do with a girl?" He asked looking up hopefully.

"No." Asuma said, trying not to just turn away. _This man can help my student This man can help my student!_ he thought to himself.

"Then, I don't wanna."

"There is a life on the line. A genin was attacked with in the village-"

"What does this have to do with me?" the hermit interrupted.

"Let me finish. He had a seal placed on him so that he cannot tell anyone what happened to him." The Sandaime concluded.

Jiraiya looked thoughtful but not entirely convinced. "How did he tell you that he had a seal on him then? Those kinds are good, I mean, the seal was part of what happened to him, right? And if your good enough to detect it than you should be able to get rid of it." The Hokage looked at his son, absorbing this and looking for an explanation.

"We didn't sense it." Asuma clarified. "My student just happens to be incredibly intelligent and managed to find a way to tell us."

"Ah. That explains it. And I suppose it's the kind that you can't remove yourself? Damn. I'll have to help then." the sannin said, and marched off toward the hospital, the Sarutobi men following behind him.

-:- -:- -:-

"Who's the freak with the white hair?" Sasuke asked as the three older men walked into the room. He was sitting in a chair, next the Shikamaru's bed, and looked quite proud of himself.

Shikamaru was bound and gagged to the bed with the sheets and various other miscellaneous item to be found around a hospital room. Complete pain free, by the way.

The Sandaime and Jiraiya looked shocked at this treatment, but Asuma seemed entirely unsurprised. "Take off the sheets so the man can undo the seal." he told the Uchiha. His student looked grateful. "But you can keep the gag until he's done." Sasuke, who looked supremely pissed, lit up and started undoing the mess with much more... cheer? Right.

"Asuma? Why are you doing this to your student?" The Hokage asked, slightly frightened.

"And what's with the Kiri-genin midget." Jiraiya followed up. Sure, Konoha was known for welcoming other villages,. but to have a nearly complete stranger taking care of your student, then not complaining when said student ends up bound and gagged.

"Just fix him now, Jiraiya-san." The lack of -sama as an honorific was noticed.

The older man shrugged and walked up to the boy on the bed. He laid him back gently and brought his hands to hover over the younger's torso. They started to glow, attracting the attention of everyone in the room. The old man's hands moved slowly over Shikamaru's entire body, searching for the seal. Finding it on his chest, Jiraiya pulled up his shirt to examine it more closely.

"It seems to be pretty powerful, although poor compared to anything the Fourth could have done." he muttered to himself. Shikamaru, being poked and prodded by an old man that was normally found peeping at the hot springs, looked very uncomfortable, but stayed still. Asuma and Sasuke were letting this happen, so he must be safe. Then again, Sasuke did tie him up.

The aging sannin pulled out a bamboo flask of ink and a tiny brush out of some hidden pocket in his clothing, setting them up on the table beside the bed. After, he pulled out a scroll and lay that over the place where he designated the seal to be. Working in tiny strokes, he coved the scroll, and a lot of the boy underneath, with characters of some forgotten language. Confident that those were complete, the man flexed his hands and began a long train of hand seals, flashing through them with and expert's ease. The occupants in the room were in awe just watching him work, with the exception of the Sandaime who was well aware of his own student's prowess.

And of the fact that now, only a minute and a half has passed since Jiraiya _entered_ the room.

Finishing his counter-seal, the old man pressed his hand carefully to the area that Kabuto wrote his own seal. A small circle of characters appeared in the space that Jiraiya had left in his own markings, before all the seals vanished. Satisfied, the sannin removed his scroll and placed it, the ink and the brush back within the folds of his shirt.

"All done." he announced. Delighted but cautiously hopeful, Asuma walked up to his student. Sasuke ran back down stairs to tell Chouji.

"How do you feel?" The jounin asked his student. Shikamaru smiled a bit nervously, embarrassed that the older man had seen so much of him, as he pulled his shirt back down.

"I'm forgetting." he stated quickly. "But the man who did this was working with someone else and they were planning on stealing Sasuke for something. The man, one of them had long black hair and make-up on his eyes. He looked young but he felt really old and he was wrong. Very wrong." The genin had slowly drifted backward until he was lying down again. Asuma was worried, he looked about to fall asleep, and he said that he was _forgetting_.

_"_The other one... was a Konoha nin... Silver... hair? eye problem... black eyes... I think his name was Ka...?" he boy looked confused for a moment before falling completely asleep. All the men in the room were silent. The descriptions of the black haired one were worrying, but the attacker. There was only one person that they knew that fit that description.

And right now, he was discussing problematic students in a bar with a random sand ninja.

-:- -:- -:-Owari -:- -:- -:-

A/N: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! I know that was completely and totally evil of me, but... BWAHAHAHA! That was too good to not do. What do you think will happen next?

Firstly, THANKIES TO REVIEWERS! You are all so sweet for standing mine chappie! I actaully have MOST of the next chapter written out, so all you have to do is be patient for (probably,) a week! Now, lots of dancing Naruto-Haku-Gaara-Shika-and Sasuke's for you all! Now, explanations!:

**(1) I **_**DID NOT**_** mean **_**many!**_

**(2) Glomp, in case you do not know, is a tackle-hug. It's very affectionate, **_**but not a pairing thing**_

**(3) I was almost sick writing that bit.**

**(4)Manly-Uchihaisms by Zeida. They are fun and will probably make more appearences**

List so far:

Manly Uchihas do not pout. They look reproachful

Manly Uchihas don't like sweets. Only Ukes like sweets.

**(5)Did any of you see that coming? I hope so. I had forshadowing and everything!**

**(6) I talk about monkeys too much XD Bonobos, if anyone here knows about their rather original culture, will make an appearance someday!**

-:- -:- -:-

Questions:

1) Do you want shorter chapters, more often, or longer ons, sporatically(the short wold be sporatic too, but I would update faster.)

2) is the whole announcing the flashbacks unprofesional? Should I continue to do that?

Reviews responses:

Sophophobic: Geez, your lucky that I caught that I had anouther(couple) reviews. I was just about to post this! Thank you for the bit about the chapter titles. I was getting annoyed with them too! Erm... Rock Lee and an excess of milk...? I'll try. But you gotta try your hand at Lee Naruto Sakura Sasuke Neji ( , being likes) and turn it into Lee Naruto, Neji Sasuke, and I'm not quite sure what happened to Sakura XD

Moonlight black rose: Good LORD woman! I'm really happy that you like my story,, but. WOW. Thanks, though.

BlackButterfly500: You vote is cicerly appreciated. I hope that this is okay?

messenger of darkness:Aww, you're so sweet. Thank you for the bunny! ((gives you a Shika-in-a-play-boy-bunny-suit-...-doll curtasy of Zeida, actaully. but I get to give it to you.)) ps. I'm told that it must be a doll(or action figure) or it will undermine the smexiness

Phantom666: Don't worry! I hate killing people. See all better and a couple laughs! ((gives you a cute-adorible-and-very-healthy-shika-who-just-happens-to-be-sitting-cutely-on-the-dismembered-corpse-of-kabuto's-dead-rotting-body-plushie)) XD yeah...

The High Demon Lord: Thankies for your votses!

FallenRaindrops: Thankies for the votes! I liked adding Sasu-chan in too! ((Gives you a Sasuke-being-very-over-protective-of-his-coveted-spot-in-mine-story-plushie)) Ja ne!

sage:((Salutes)) I hope this is up to your standards!

RobotPirateNinja: ... gruesome... Haku, Gaara and Naruto don't really know Shika all that well. And at least Haku wouldn't go around randomly tearing ppl apart. But as to your first reviiew, I didn't wanna! The chappie typed itself!

it's-not-amoose323: No, it's not. Sorry, I like your name! There, all better. And he even gets to forget being cut up! I will not let him get more lazy, no worries

Light of Shunshin: Thank you very muchlies! You have a very good point! I'm really confused on what to do, you see the special thing is based of his family jutsu, and I had something really funny planned for it. (I'm telling you this becausee I'm really not sure if I'm gonna use it.) As for Kabuto, beleive it or not, I really like the guy, but at this point he isn't likely to live long. Sorry! ((gives you a super-and-alive-Kabuto-stalking-his-usual,-and-very-unfortunate-victim-plushie)) You will never guess who 'his usual victim is'. Neverz! Virtual cookies and a dedication if you do! XD I should really offer that to everyone, shouldn't I? Maybe

Kikijulie678yuiKitten: ((is confused a second)) AhHA! Thankies for you voteses, have a good night, uh...sorry about taking so long and...glad you like the pushie!((gives you a party-naru-chan-plushie)) weee!

Musei: OMG...that was soooo creepy! I wanna try it!

Reveiw, please!

Queen of the MEEP


	8. T h E c H u U n I n E x A m S

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**(A/N:) Read me! **sorry that this took longer than I said it would. I am currently haing problems with the server. I was Also slightly depressed at the lack of reviews. I promised that I would update no mater what, buIt just takes me longer wen I have no reviews. Thank you to those who DID review. You are sweet. Editors Notes at the bottom, as usual. Enjoy your read!**/\**

**On the Wings of Revenge **

Zeida and Maria (Maria)Insanity, crack, violence, blood, gore, plotholes, randomness, lack of plot to begin with, language etc... Etc... I don't own it. Zabuza finds Naruto after Haku, and takes him away. This is half crack nuttiness. Vengeful!Naruto. It's starting to look like a foursome to me but it's _not_? Just brother love? Gaara, Haku, Naruto and Sasuke...nuttiness. Shikamaru shows a lot too! Have I proved myself nuts yet? 

**-**

**-**

**NOTICE!:** This one wants to hold a little contest! The prizes will be: A chapter dedication to you! and a (non-NC17, X, or R rated) Fan art drawing of your choice! (Yes, I CAN draw) Now, In this story, I seem to be being VERY nasty about/to Kabuto. He is very likely to die, really. But the truth is he is one of my favorite characters! Weird, eh? The only Character that I _can't _bash is Shino, actually. Someday, I will make a story that is nicer to the poor guy. But as for the contest: Me and Zeida were role playing once and we made Kabuto stalk (but was in LURVE with) a REALLY random character. Except in _Canon_, he was actually nice to said chara! I want you, loyal and sweet reviewers to try and Guess who it is! Guess! Go on, I dare you! You will NEVER guess! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Anyway, this contest will end when someone guesses the right person. I will update anouncing this no matter how much of mine chappie is done, so you are very likely to get one helluva weird chappie!

Thanks

**/\**

ChApTeR EiGhT: Beginning The Chuunin Exams

Shikamaru recovered quickly. When he awoke again, this time with Sasuke and Chouji present, he could not remember anything that happened in the past day. Asuma, not sure what to do about the information about Kakashi attacking his student, told all three that the deer boy had forgotten everything before they got a chance to ask. Currently, he and Jiraiya (Who wasn't as bad as he first suspected, although easily _distracted_) were stalking the silver-haired Jounin. They weren't sure why, but Jiraiya hypothesized that they were somehow trying to prove him innocent.

Asuma was faced with a conundrum. Shikamaru was his student, and he had been attacked. He would remember the details perfectly. But, then again, the smoker (Who had stopped doing so, actually) had known Kakashi for years, as had Jiraiya. He just wouldn't do that, even to an enemy. Besides, it was debatable that he knew medical skills like those that were evident of his students body, although the man could learn it at a glance.

Well, if he ever got a chance to wreak vengeance an a couple certain, _dead_, people... he might just resort to that.

But they were already dead, and they weren't Shikamaru.

The silver haired jounin was behaving perfectly normal as far as the two stalkers could see. He was training his last remaining student, Sakura, with her new team, and their sensei. The pink haired girl and Temari (one of the sand nin) tag teamed brilliantly, but the sensei were trying to get them to work with Kankuro as well.

It wasn't working. They kept using him as a distraction, or his puppets as a shield. It ended rather painful most of the time for the poor boy. They just weren't made to work together. Asuma silently decided that the sand boy would work best with a close-range fighter, using his chakra strings to up his or her speed and dexterity. Neither of the girls fought like that.

-:- -:- -:-

Kurenai's team had recovered for their traumatizing ordeal as well. Hinata came in the next day, telling her team that her father had asked her why several ANBU went through lengths to tell him that they didn't do anything to his daughter. That caused a laugh (well, from everyone but Shino).

The female jounin was quite happy with the information that they had gotten and grinned widely as she saw who the examiners would be. She ordered them to train specifically in anything they thought they might need in the exam. They were to come to her if they felt the need to learn anything that she hadn't already taught them, and she would help them along.

Kiba worked mostly on his partnership with Akamaru, training up a move they had create together. Shino worked against them a lot, working on his own defense. Both started to help Hinata on a Jyuuken move that she wasn't quite getting.

"Hinata-san, I do not believe that this will work for you." Shino said, as she fell once more, failing to block the bug user. Kiba glared at him for making her look so defeated, but didn't really say anything against it. He, too, could feel that this wasn't what the girl was good at.

"You coulda been a little less blunt." he muttered to the taller boy instead.

"I'm s-sorry..." Hinata said, getting up. She knew she wasn't good at this, but her father...

"Calm down Hinata," Kurenai soothed. "Don't worry about it. They just don't think that you are made for close range fighting. How about you try something new?"

Kiba nodded happily and Hinata seemed to cheer up a bit. "Yeah! You could try that really cool stuff that the jounin do sometimes! The chakra blades and stuff!" He mimicked what he saw one of them doing and attempted a little dagger made of chakra. It came out a bit limp as his control wasn't all that great. Imagine a wet noodle.

"Kiba," Shino said, foregoing honorifics in his annoyance with the smaller boy. "That is still close range fighting. If she were to do something like that then it would have closer relation to kunai." He didn't mean to sound so testy. He just wasn't feeling quite right. His kikai were acting oddly and telling him that there was something wrong with him, but when he went to check it out, he came up with nothing.

Kurenai looked worriedly at the bug-user, but only replied to his comment. She would just keep an eye on him, there was no need to pamper her students. "That's a good idea, Shino. Would you like to try that, Hinata?"

The Hyuuga girl looked interested but looked away. "My f-father would not want me too... It is an insult to the clan." Kiba pouted, about to object, when their sensei interrupted him.

"Enough about him! He isn't here and even if he was I wouldn't care! Do _you _want to try this?" she asked.

The timid girl looked down for a moment and he team almost thought that she was going to refuse. "Yes!" she said firmly, looking up again. Kurenai smiled at her as Kiba celebrated (danced) and Shino patted her shoulder briefly and nodded.

The tranquility of the moment was brutally murdered when Kiba tried to get Shino to celebrate (Dance!) with him and got knocked halfway across the clearing.

Never make an Aburame dance.

-:- -:- -:-

In another part of Konoha, on another day, other teams were training hard for the upcoming exams as well. Although, maybe not all with the same amount of willingness. Chouji and Ino chased their third teammate all over the training ground, springing surprise moves and pit falls and traps on him. They barely gave him time to react before attacking him again, and definitely not giving him enough time to think. Asuma was there for once, and kept an eye on them to make sure no one got carried away and accidentally killed someone.

Although at this point the jounin was pretty sure that Shikamaru was going to murder the other two with quite a bit of premeditation. Suddenly, the group steered towards him, the genius thinking that maybe the other two would slow down coming at their sensei. Unfortunately for all parties involved, Asuma thought that maybe when Shikamaru's plan worked he would stop as well. Both assuming that the plan would work, and the other two would slow down.

Chouji sent an explosive kunai ahead of the deer boy in hopes of redirecting him and completely forgetting her sensei. Instead of veering to the side, Shikamaru tripped over the protrusion, accidentally looking back right as it was thrown past his other side. He crashed into the older man with an explosion from the kunai and a loud pop as the bushin of their sensei dissipated. The deer boy landed on the ground with a surprised thud.

For a moment, all three just stared at the place where their sensei was, expecting him to pop out of a tree and reprimand them about losing control. After five minutes and he still didn't show, Ino exploded. "He's not here AGAIN! We need to train Shikamaru so that he doesn't get himself nearly killed again!"

"I don't want to train, Ino." Shikamaru objected. Both of his teammates glared at him and he shut up. Even Chouji was being scary about this. Troublesome...

"It was too close a call last time, Shikamaru. What if we were on a mission! No one would have gotten to you in time." the Akamichi was giving him that puppy dog look. The boy couldn't stand it. Chouji was one of his best friends and he was worried. The chubby boy was losing weight alarmingly fast because of all the exercise that they were putting the pony-tailed boy through. Not to mention he wasn't eating nearly as much. He was obviously depressed about what happened. Damn, depressed peacemaker is not a good thing!

After waking up again in the hospital after the sannin, Jiraiya, had cured him, he found he couldn't remember anything after getting to the training grounds early several days ago. He didn't remember what had happened to him, or how bad it had been. Although the genin could guess that it had been pretty awful, however, by the way everyone was acting around him. (There was even one of the newer nurses at the hospital that couldn't look at him with out turning a nasty shade of green.) There were also scars all over his body. They were new and very visible, but he couldn't tell how deep any of them had been. He assumed that they must have been pretty bad if there were left over marks.

Shikamaru sighed, resigned. "Fine. I'll go along with this crap. But only if you-" he pointed at Chouji, "Start eating right again. And you- " his finger moved to Ino, "Come help me find Asuma-sensei so I can watch you yell at him." Both his friends grinned at him, their new objective in sight.

-:- -:- -:-

Asuma himself was watching as the newly formed team lay gasping on the ground. This was his, and Jiraiya's, third day watching the copycat jounin. There was only two days left to the chuunin exams. The smoking nin (who, again, stopped) had told his team about the upcoming exam, explaining that what he was going to talk to them about that awful day was entering them in the exams. He said that he didn't want to do that anymore, but that had caused an uproar. Even from Shikamaru, the boy was secretly (as in they didn't tell Ino) hoping to run into Sasuke there. He was also deeply ashamed that his sensei didn't think that he could do it. That he was weak.

The team on the ground had just completed there team attack. It could not be called perfected as it was a strategy more than a move and must be versatile. The jounin training them looked exhausted as well, having had to go against the rather formidable move. Kakashi was acting as he usually would when tired. As far as the two men could see, he was exactly the same as usual.

Maybe he acted the same, evil or no? That was a scary thought. He wasn't even showing guilt.

Or stress that Shikamaru had survived. Maybe he knew the boy would forget? Damn, he-

"Good Morning, comrades!" Howled a sudden voice from between Asuma and Jiraiya. Both men turned shakily towards him, and evil look plastered on their faces. Their hearts still beating a million times a minute. "Why are you sp-!"

Kakashi looked up at the loud tree curiously as both stalker-sans pounced on Gai to shut him up and ran far, far away.

Stopping quite possibly on the opposite side of Konoha, Asuma dropped the man and glared at him. Jiraiya rubbed him temples trying to ward of a growing headache. He looked down at Gai, then up as the man stood, dusting himself off.

"Comrades... that was un-youthful. My butt hurts." Gai frowned manly...ly at them.

The other jounin glared at him, ready to strangle the man. "We were in the middle of something!" he growled instead. Jiraiya nodded in agreement.

"You were stalking eternal-rival Kakashi." Gai said, posing. Jiraiya nodded in agreement.

Asuma sighed. "Hai, we were trying to figure something out." Jiraiya nodded in agreement.

"Does this have something to do with the very un-youthful attack in your precious student?" the green man (2) leaned in curiously, his hands akimbo.(3) Jiraiya nodded in agreement.

"Shikamaru's last statement of the man who attacked him, before he lost all memory of the subject, condemned Kakashi. And he's not precious! It's just that he's my student..." bearded jounin informed him. Jiraiya nodded in agreement.

"Ah, I see, that is quite bad. But it could have been a genjutsu. Or perhaps someone else. I know Eternal Rival Kakashi well, and he would not do such a thing." Gai nodded forcefully. Jiraiya nodded in agreement.

"That is true..." Asuma conceded. "But we have nothing else to go on." Both men looked at Jiraiya curiously when he did nothing.

"..."

"..."

"..."

Jiraiya nodded in agreement and both jounin did and excellent double rendition of an anime feint.

Recovering quickly, Gai leapt youthfully to his feet. "Yosh! I will help you in your quest to find this evil-Eternal-Rival-Kakashi-Imitating-precious-student-murd-ahem-,-I-mean-attacking-man." the green man pumped his fist energetically through the air and started jogging in place.

The other two just looked at him. "Sure, I would appreciate all the help I can get. And stop saying precious!" Asuma said finally.

Jiraiya nodded in agreement.

-:- -:- -:-

The mist team lazed around in the hotel room that they had rented out for their stay in Konoha. They had but one day left to go, and it was one boring day. They had trained earlier, but were kicked off of the training ground by some irate ninja or another.

Sasuke had been whining ever since.

Naruto was actually doing a pretty competent job of ignoring him, considering the blonde's temper. Then again, considering his attention span, it was no miracle. He and Gaara had been playing with cards for the past two hour, running trough a list of games. They were currently trying to tell each others fortune, Tarot style, but the cards really didn't work like that. Haku was watching them, and the Uchiha was complaining to him, getting even on his patient nerves.

"You said that if I came with you, you would train me. You said that it would be soooo hard I'd be lucky to be breathing after, let alone 'thanking' you." he groused at them. "Well? I'm breathing I'm talking just fine- "

"We noticed." Gaara muttered.

"- so we should go train!" The bird haired boy ignored him.

"We _can't_." Haku stressed. "The Konoha nin get first dibs on their own training grounds."

Sasuke frowned at the pretty boy. "Then we can find somewhere else to train." The long haired male twitched.

"Oh? And why would we do that?" Naruto asked curiously. Seriously, it didn't make sense to him.

"Because, then we can _train_." Sasuke said, as though it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Sasuke. You _are_ training." Gaara deadpanned, flipping over another one of his cards. "Damn, I think you won, Naru-chan."

Naruto raised his eye brows, not looking up. "How the hell did I do that? This isn't a win-lose thing."

"I want to train _more_." The broody brunet interjected.

"Be patient, Sasuke. We will catch up at home." Haku soothed.

"Well," Gaara said to his Tarot companion. "You got this card, and this one too! That adds up to twenty-one."

The other three turned to look at him. "Wrong game, Gaara." Sasuke drawled.

The red head pouted up at his 'pet'. "Aww, come on. It's hard to remember what were playing with these cards. What game does it belong to?"

"Whatever." The Sharingan wielder muttered, ignoring his teammate and heading for the door. He peeked out of one eye at Haku, who he could see was twitching. "Can we go train now?"

That was the last push, the original mist nin spun around, fire in his eyes. He lashed his arm out in an arc facing the unfortunate Uchiha, releasing half a dozen needles. Sasuke turned around with an incredible slowness that comes from watching with adrenaline. Four of the senbon lashed past him, embedding in the wall behind him. The fifth whizzed past his head as he just barely dodged it in his sluggish movements.

The last hit dead on, burying itself in the boy's temple.

"Oh, SHIT!"

The other three shot up as he fell to the ground, running over in a panic.

"I didn't mean to! I really didn't" Haku squeaked, crouching down. Gaara followed him, and felt for the boys pulse with trembling hands.

"I-I don't feeling anything..." he stammered.

"I really didn't! I'm used to dealing-hic- with you! I shouldn't- You could have dodged!" the black haired boy was trembling, on the verge of hysterics.

Naruto stared at the fallen boy in shock. For some reason he felt that he had lost someone as precious to him as the two boys on either side of him or Zabuza-sama. He hadn't even known him that long, why would he feel like that?

Then, the genjutsu popped, and the needle fell to the ground with a clatter.

The trio looked on in minor catatonia, their hysterics turning to weak, sparse giggling, half in relief, half in confusion.

"Heh heh... heh... heh heh... WHAT?!" all three streaked, startling most of Konoha.

-:- -:- -:-

Finally the week had ended. The jounin lead their nervous teams over to the meeting place for the first test. It was a very tall wood and brick building. It looked fairly old, and several parts looked like they were rebuilt from destruction caused by something, or someone, crashing through it. All in all, it was not a place that you wanted to go in.

They were told to meet their sensei on the third floor. Everyone arrived at different times, meaning that the teams would have to meet up in side. There was no way to know what was coming next. Even team 8 which got a glimpse of what was coming had no clue what was about to hit them.

The dark hallway that was the entrance opened up to an enormous room. That was absolutely stuffed with ninja. genin from all the major villages, and quite a few of the minor ones were there. All animosity and dread from ninja and kunoichi of all different ages forced to occupy one room. Kiba, when he entered, noticed a distinct scent of blood. Obviously a couple genin had already lost their tempers. There were, however, no sings of any unconscious or wounded ninja or kunoichi. There could be healers, but it was much more likely that they were deemed too weak and carted out with their teammates.

Several of the Konoha ninja knew that, in several other villages, the unfortunate genin would also be fallen upon by their own team later, for failing.

Everyone spun around as the doors were kicked open by a short boy with silvery hair and eye patch. The eye patch was attached to his headband, which proudly displayed the symbol of the mist. His air was in a long braid flopping around behind him as he shot into the room landing in an exaggerated ready stance.

"I'm prepared for anything! So, cummon! Cummon! Let's fight!" he yelled cheerfully into the room. Everyone stared.

A tall black haired boy followed him in and set a calming hand on his shoulder. He seemed to be wearing a white mask with a kanji symbol at the top. He too wore a headband with the Kiri sign, though not on his forehead. His clothing was ass long and graceful as he himself, and there was no skin showing.

"Arashi-kun, please calm yourself. We should not be making so many enemies so early on." he told the other boy in a soft voice.

"Too late." the third voice hissed, stepping in behind them. The last teammate seemed to be their kunoichi. She had violently electric blue hair, and soft features. From what they heard of the hiss, her voice was soft, but not in a kind way like the other one. Her skin was a medium hue, peach, but not pale. She had a small animal perched on her shoulder that looked to be a cross between a lemur and a raccoon. Something only native to Mist, perhaps?

Most males in the room were instantly... _fond _of her, but were creeped out as she spoke again.

"Let's find somewhere to sit." not all that frightening on it's own, except for the fact that 'her' voice was deep, far deeper than a _girl's _was. Damn, that hiss was misleading.

They wandered over, with Shikaeshi in the lead, to a group of Leaf genin that had gathered in one spot. Several people looked up at the intrusion, but only one did anything. To most everyone's surprise, Shikamaru stood and walked over to the mist stranger. Grabbing his sleeve, he pulled his friend back to his seat with him.

Others in the group recognize the mist team as well. Team eight recognizing the silver haired boy as one that had bounced over to congratulate them.

Naruto recognized them too.

He walked straight up to Shino, asked him how he was, then thumped him hard on the back, again. The bug user frowned at him from behind his collar. That hurt.

Neji's team walked over to them, lead by an enthusiastic Lee. He wanted to see the other 'youthful flowers of Konoha.' Oddly enough, he zeroed in on Sakura.

"Green… Green spandex…" Gaara said, staring at the boy that he had mentally traumatized earlier in the week. Yes, there was a talking lemur-raccoon perched on Sasuke's shoulder. Shikamaru looked it oddly, but no one else seemed to have noticed. For their own sanity, truly. Sasuke felt that his was certainly gone after noticing the thing.

"Oh, Gaara, just ignore-" Sasuke muttered, temporarily forgetting his teammates affixation with the color and wincing at the attire of the wide eyed boy.

"Green Spandex on a total hottie..." the other three could see a little drop of drool making its way down the side of Gaara's mouth. His teammates stared at him, then Lee, then back at him. This time several others did turn their head, and Shikamaru was staring at the fuzzy Gaara with wide (disturbed) eyes. Unfortunately for the Uchiha reputation, not that most people knew it was him, they thought he had proclaimed the older genin to be attractive.

"Um, Gaa- I mean, Suishu-shu? That boy is, one a boy, you can't make babies with another boy, and therefore, they aren't supposed to appear 'hot' to you. And two, he is _soooo _not hot." Naruto tried to explain. Sasuke snorted and Haku rolled his eyes at the attempt. Those that thought that the mysterious Shikaeshi had been the one to speak, now believed his name to be Suishu-shu. Shikamaru, who had noticed this course of events, smirked. He doubted that his friend would escape Konoha again with his dignity.

Lee, hearing this, turned slowly to face the raccoon.

It winked at him.

And blew a heart at him.

The green genin's eyes went wide and he fitfully dodged the kiss. Tenten and Neji looked down at him, both raising an eyebrow. Several of the rookie nine tried to hide giggles and snickers at the antics of a nutcase and a pet. They all heard a voice that none of them had heard before, laughing along. Looking around, the Konoha group tried to locate the eaves dropper, but the laugh wasn't coming from any of the surrounding group. Suddenly, Kiba spun around as Shino clapped a hand over his mouth, his face slowly turning red.

"Did... did you just laugh?" Kiba crowed, astonished. He was pointing a shaky finger at his teammate.

Shino didn't answer. He just stood there, looking _nervously _at the people starring at him. The bug user seemed to shrink, not liking the attention in the least.

"Sh-Shino-kun? Are you alright?" Hinata asked looking worried.

"I am fine." The Aburame answered, a little loudly. His team looked at him oddly. As did most of the room.

The bug-user, seeing this, side stepped so that he was standing behind Kiba. The dog-boy looked up, smirking. "Do you know that you look like a big evil shadow behind me?"

"Shut up, Kiba."

Kiba raised his eyebrows, still smirking. This was a riot. "My, my, so testy. Are you nervous?"

"No!" Shino answered loudly again, a bit too fast. The dog user turned to look at him closer and Hinata peered in as well. Both looked as though they were about to say something, but it was not to be.

"Alright, you brats, settle down! Do yourselves a favor and go home!" The group turned to see two genin standing, guarding a door. Many of the older genin glared at the intended insult.

It was the door they needed to go through to the test. Several genin stalked up to the door, looking pissed. One got up from the ground where the guard-genin seemed to have thrown him. His team looked angry and they attacked, "Let's see you stop all of us!"

One of the pair, the one with tape on his cheeks and chin, raised an eyebrow. He stepped forward alone, and blocked the three of them easily. "See what you're up against?" He said, ignoring the groaning team on the ground to address the whole crowd. "You don't stand a chance."

Shikaeshi looked at his team to see what they would do and saw them smirking. Next to him, Shikamaru was frowning hard at the genin. He saw Sakura and her sand teammate, Temari, whispering together, Ino joining in soon after. They nodded at each other to emphasize some point or another, and broke off to alert the remained of their teams.

"Do you see it?" The Uchiha was shaken from his thoughts as his short, silver haired partner shot a question.

The genin looked again at the pair and noticed a thin haze around them. The remnants of a medium grade genjutsu. Looking around, Shikaeshi saw it on the door as well. Neji, spotting it too, hurriedly stopped his green teammate from attacking the group.

"That is a very poor ploy." Team 8 stared at Shino as he spoke up. The rest of the room turned as well and he 'hid' behinds Kiba... again. He refused to say anymore until Hinata and the dog-boy managed to calm him enough to get him to tell them what his bugs had told him of the floor.

Shikamaru summed

"How long have you known?" The deer boy looked around to see Sasuke looking forward as another team attacked the pair guarding the door.

"Since I saw them, they don't match the description of any genin in Konoha, but they do match the younger ages of two upper-class chuunin that are known only to work together." _And just about everything else, too_. he thought. The Uchiha shook his head at the knowledge of his friend, he should really use it more often.

"What do you say we discreetly walk out under the pretext of giving up?" he questioned again.

Shikamaru shrugged, getting up. "This is all too troublesome," he said in a loud, annoyed voice. "I'm outta here." His team followed him out, catching onto his plan, each sighing dejectedly. Sasuke's team went soon after, muttering audibly about not standing a chance if the teams from the place were scared. They were mimicked by the rest of rookie nine, Neji's team, and the two from sand, all making their own excuses on giving up.

Izumo snickered to himself, catching on to what they were doing.

You're so sadistic...

You love it.

-:- -:- -:-

The new room was also filled with eager genin, about as much as there were in the other room. All of them had either noticed the genjutsu and walked out, as our heroes did, or didn't even bother to enter the room. There was actually one team that didn't even bother to enter the building and used chakra to climb up the side to the floor. They all turned as the new group walked in. Someone muttered loudly about a bunch of brats giving away the game. Another joined in with 'How easy are they gonna be to beat.'

Naruto, braid flopping angrily opened his mouth to yell out some new challenge, when he was interrupted.

"We did not give away your 'game'. We simply solved it, likely faster than yourselves, and left the room." Shino clarified in a loud voice. Some of the genin cringed. Aburame were scary people. Especially one that deemed you noticable to target. Which was never a good thing.

Kiba and Hinata looked sideways at their teammate again. Something was seriously up.

The bug user, seeming to finally realize that he dissed a large group of bloodthirsty shinobi, clamped his hands over his reddening face again and 'hid' behind his teammate yet again. The dog user sighed.

"Now, now don't make such a scene out of yourselves." The group turned as a leaf genin walked toward them. "Look around, do you really want to be making enemies so soon?" He was tall with round glasses and silver hair tied back in a pony tail. He smiled kindly at them, introducing himself. "My name is Yakushi Kabuto. You?"

They all stared at him, mixed opinions among the group. Temari tried to remain inconspicuous, knowing that this was in fact the right hand man of the village that her father was working with in the invasion of Konoha. Kankuro, on the other hand, had other ideas. "Oh, hello, Kabuto-san. It's nice to see you again!" Temari glared at him, Kabuto looked confused (although inside he was fuming) and Sakura frowned thoughtfully at him.

Shino's insects went wild, screaming at him to stay far, far away from the man. Akamaru had a similar reaction, causing Kiba to stick to puppy in his jacket instead of his hood, to better comfort his companion. Hinata looked worriedly at both her teammates and decided that staying back would be best.

Gaara recognized the silver haired males voice as the one that had been talking to the another about Sasuke. His name, too. The rest of the mist team did as well, pulling their newest member with them, and backing safely away.

Shikamaru looked at Kabuto oddly, he seemed familiar. Very familiar. It was the kind of feeling you get when you're eating and you look at the red mushroom with white spots that you seem to have just taken a bite out of.

He backed up as well, his team following.

Neji, Tenten and Lee looked around them, confused, as they were suddenly the only ones within talking distance of the random leaf genin. The green boy twitched as he felt the weight of a small furry animal suddenly land on his shoulder. "You need to get your team away from him!" it hissed into his ear so he was the only one who heard. Lee frowned, perplexed. Surely a genin of their own village was someone they could be safe around. They were comrades of youth!

"He smells like the blood of hundreds, including that of a couple of you friends!" Gaara tried again. The genin's wide eyes grew wider.

"Yosh, this spot is unYOUTHful! We should...-he looked around frantically- back up over there!" Lee latched on to both his teammates and dragged them away from the traitor in disguise.

Kabuto looked around in confusion. "Do I smell funny?" he asked. The group did their very best to ignore him. Take into mind that they are shinobi, and their best is pretty dang good.

"Oi! Oi, ya bunch of gakitachi!!" The room was distracted as a very tall man appeared out of nowhere. He was backed by a herd of powerful and scary-looking chuunin. The man ordered them into assigned seats all over the room. They were to go to one of a set of three seats at a desk, there were two columns of five desks, meaning that in this room, there were thirty genin, ten teams. Some teams were lead out of the room into another, where the numbers are unknown. Any that got mixed up were lead to the correct spot by the chuunin. To make matters worse, said chuunin spoke loudly about how if they couldn't manage to get to the right spot, how did they expect to pass the actual tests? That was two more teams down, that they could see. Many noticed that they were no longer anywhere near their teammates, although all teams were within the same room.

"Now that you're seated, I'm Morino Ibiki. I'm the examiner for this exam." The chuunin sat along the edges of the room, pulling out clipboards. Each was at the end of one of the desks, assigned to a group of three people.

"Now, there are some rules for this test." The jounin started to write on the board, still talking. "First, there are ten question. You notice that there are only nine on the page? Good, if you didn't you need to go back to school for about five more years.

"Well, the last one will come 45 minutes before the end of the test. As for the rest, you start out with ten points. Every answer you get wrong is a point off. Every time you're caught cheating, it's point off. Got it? Good.

"Next, If you run out of points, you and your team are out of here. If you don't have enough points at the end because you completely and totally suck at tests, you fail. Before you start, I don't care if you have perfect everything else, you fail you leave." he finished, turning to face the group again.

"Start."

Sasuke frowned down at the written exam. He didn't know the answers to most of these.

Or any, really.

But he had gotten the implication of the jounin examiner. This was a test of his information gathering skills. They weren't supposed to be able to know the answers. Damn, if he just had the Sharingan, then he could do this no problem. There was just the minor difficulty of he didn't and now what was he supposed to do?

He looked down at the paper again, huffing. Then just barely suppressed surprise as he saw a tiny amount of sand worming itself around the paper. Squinting at it, he realized that it was forming words. With a start he compassed that Gaara was giving him the answers. From his vantage point on Sasuke's head, he could see the room, and the few people in the room that seemed to know what they were doing. Actually, now that the raccoon thought of it, it was very suspicious.

In another part of the room, people were having it a little easier with cheating. Upon entering the room, Haku suspend a number of icy mirrors from the ceiling, out of the sight of prying eyes. Creating a final one in his hand, he had a full view of the entire room. Easy cheating.

The original mist boy looked out of the corner of his eye to see his other teammates. Sasuke seemed to be doing fire with Gaara's help, so he looked for Naruto.

The blond boy had no idea what he was going to do. He had tried to contact his demon, but the annoying fluff ball had said that he needed to learn such things himself, if he wanted to make it any further. Damn.

Annoying honorable ... fuzz! Naruto pouted and looked up, leaning back in his chair. Wait... There were mirrors hanging from the ceiling. One bunch seemed to be Haku's and then there was another group, controlled by wires from somewhere in the room. Smirking, he looked at the reflections of the answers in the two sets of mirrors.

Lee moved his hitai ate a little two the left, sending out a blink of light that was the okay sign. Keeping the shiny accessory there, he was able to see the answers he needed twice reflected in the metal.

Tenten stopped twitching her wires at the signal, and took her own headband down as though to polish it in annoyance. Quickly she memorized the answers she saw and wrote them down. It was with a triumphant smirk that she tied the protection device back on.

Across the room their final teammate finished writing down the answers acquired by the Byakugan. He noticed that his small, and timid cousin was also using this strategy.

Hinata, when finished with the test, looked discreetly (Byakugan) about the room for he teammates. They were both doing fine, to her relief.

Kiba was getting the answers barked quietly to him by his dog and Shino had just finished writing the last of his. Suddenly things went wrong.

"Caught!" One of the chuunin at the edge of the room said to Shino. The bug user looked up at him in confusion. "You were caught cheating." the man clarified with a sigh.

"I did not cheat." Shino 'protested'. The chuunin just shook his head. Everyone in the room had stopped to watch.

"I did not." he said again. He pointed at a boy in one corner of the room, causing the rest of the room to look there as well. "You were concerned with the genjutsu that was situated next to me? It belongs to him. Not me. Continue to think things through thoroughly before pinning the blame on an innocent. You should consider yourself lucky that you are even a chuunin with your present skill."

The chuunin sat very quickly, his face burning. Ibiki laughed to himself. There were some interesting kids in this group. He turned to the only one, aside from the secretly placed chuunin in the room, who seemed to actually know the answers. She was hurriedly scribbling down the last one.

There! Sakura thought to her self. All done. Now to signal to Temari to start the genjutsu. She started signing with her hands at Kankuro, who had just asked to be accompanied to the bathroom. He barely nodded, the poked Temari as he passed. She grinned as her brother headed to the bathroom with his puppet to get his answers. Then started synchronized hand seals under the table with Sakura.

Suddenly she was seeing through her teammates eyes with her mental voices explaining her answers. They decided that it would be best if she understood it, because they might be asked to prove it, or need to use the information later.

Then all went black as Ino completed he Shintenshin no jutsu and entered their (at the moment) body. No one noticed that two girls seemed to fallen asleep on their tests.

Ino smirked to herself. Too easy. She looked out Sakura's eyes to see the answers and memorized them. Giggling to herself, she decided to take a quick look around her rival's mind. It was mostly black, no sign of the sleeping embodiment of Sakura that was supposed to be there. Then she came upon it.

There seemed to be... two Sakuras and a Temari sleeping together in a heap.

Weird!

Ino left very quickly, and rose from her seat. She wrote down her answers and began a second Shintenshin.

The jounin had indeed noticed the two girls sudden sleep, but thought nothing of it. It wasn't until a third collapsed and the first two rose that they started to worry. The the second girl goes and fall down again. Then she gets up and two boy collapse!

Geez, what was up with these genin?! It seemed like they were playing some perverse game of whack-a-mole. Ibiki did consider that it could be part of a code, but there was nothing discernable he could make out from multiple students giving themselves concussions.

"Alright, the last question" the examiner said suddenly. Everyone sat up and looked at him, full attention.

"First, there is one more rule to be added. This is absolute, there are no special cases. You get to decide whether to answer the question." The genin murmured surprised and delighted. "The rule, however, is: if you get the question wrong, you fail instantly, you leave, and you can never take the test again. You will never progress past genin."

"What?!" several people yelled in dismay. This had never happened before. "That's no fair!"

Ibiki shrugged, smirking. "Oh, well. I guess you've never had me before."

"What happens if we choose not to take it?" another genin asked.

The smirk widened. "Then you lose all your points, and you along with your team fail this test." The room fell silent, looking to their teammates for their opinions. Pass or Fail.

Pass or never be anything more than genin.

Ever.

Four teams walked out one after another. Each with their head hanging down in misery and shame.

Gaara and Naruto met eyes, nodding simultaneously. Suddenly all hell broke loose as two voices started shouting objections at once.

"That's stupid!" Squeaked the little raccoon on Sasuke's shoulder, causing the boy to jolt. Along with everyone else in the room. Oddly enough, a number of people still refused to connect the voice with anything other than the nearest human to it, despite the fact that summons of any sort or level are known to speak. There goes a little more of Sasuke's dignity.

"Do you really think we would give up so easily?!" Naruto joined in, pounding his hand on the table.

"Who cares if you don't get passed genin!"

"Ranks don't really matter anyway! Do you really think an enemy is gonna care?"

"Besides, after a point, everyone's going to know how strong you are with or without rank."

They both nodded to emphasis it, suddenly lapsing into silence. Ibiki smirked._ Quite the group we have indeed_. he thought.

"I see. So anyone else?" No one raised a hand. Everyone looked at him apprehensively, waiting for the question.

"Good job, all of you. You pass the first test of the chuunin exam."

**-:- -:- -:-_Owari_-:- -:- -:-(1)** just a fancy way of saying realized**(2)** oh, how tempting it was to write Ho ho ho Green Giant, or something along those lines...**(3)** For those who don't know, akimbo means hands on hips.**\/**

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**Click click! You click me! Give give! Give me review!**


	9. T h E c U r S e D s E a L

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**(A/N:) Read me! **sorry that this took longer than I said it would. Really, I an Sooo sorry. I made this humongous (by my standards) as compesation. I'm sorry if I don't respond to your reveiws. If you really want an answer to something, say it again this time, and I will be sure to reply via review resonse! XD Oh! The contest below is still going on.

**Review Responses:**

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**On the Wings of Revenge **

**By:** Zeida and Maria (Maria)

**Warnings:**Insanity, crack, violence, blood, gore, plotholes, randomness, lack of plot to begin with, language etc... Etc...

**Disclaimer:** I don't own it.

**Summary:** Zabuza finds Naruto after Haku, and takes him away. This is half crack nuttiness. Vengeful!Naruto. It's starting to look like a foursome to me but it's _not_? Just brother love? Gaara, Haku, Naruto and Sasuke...nuttiness. Shikamaru shows a lot too! Have I proved myself nuts yet? Inspired by my own nutty-ness.

**NOTICE!:** This one wants to hold a little contest! The prizes will be: A chapter dedication to you! and a (non-NC17, X, or R rated) Fan art drawing of your choice! (Yes, I CAN draw) Now, In this story, I seem to be being VERY nasty about/to Kabuto. He is very likely to die, really. But the trruth is he is one of my favorite characters! Weird, eh? The only Character that I _can't _bash is Shino, actually. Someday, I will make a story that ios nicer to the poor guy. But as for the contest: Me and Zeida were role playing once and we made Kabuto stalk(but was in LURVE with) a REALLY random character. Except in _Canon_, he was actually nice to said chara! I want you, loyal and sweet reviewers to try and Guess who it is! Guess! Go on, I dare you! You will NEVER guess! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! 

Tries:

"It can't be Naruto, because he was a real jerk to him later on. It can't be Kiba, because he knocked him out. It can't be Sakura, he never really interacted with her. It could be Hinata, but she never interacted with him. That leaves two options, both equally disturbing. Kimmimaro or Baki. Kimmimaro was cruelly manipulated by Kabuto, so that doesn't work either. So it has to be Baki. That's certainly random." by RobotPirateNinja

Anyway, this contest will end when someone guesses the right person. I will update anouncing this no matter how much of mine chappie is done, so you are very likely to get one helluva weird chappie!

Thanks

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ChApTeR NiNe: The Cursed Seal

"Stand at the assigned gates. When they open, you may begin." Team 10 stared apprehensively at the doors, waiting impatiently. They had been here for what seemed like hours, even though Shikamaru's mind told him over and over that it had only been a few minutes. They were entering a forest where their lives would be in danger. Seriously in danger. And most of the genin in there had no qualms about killing a little tree-hugger Konoha nin, even some of the other Konohanians. That one silver haired genin still reminded him of that fly mushroom...

The doors finally creaked open, and the Nara boy reminded himself to look out for Sasuke, as he promised to meet up with him. They traveled a long time in silence, avoiding some of the worse battles. Ino and Chouji may have started a super training régime, and they might have dragged him into it, but it wasn't quite early enough to make a big difference.

Suddenly, a team came flying out at his right, aiming for them. Damn, he'd let himself be distracted. They weren't ready; they... might stand a chance. The group they were facing were fighting tooth and nail to get there first, and nearly crashing into a couple trees on the way. Fight happy idiots, that though they had found some easy targets. Well, team 10 would prove otherwise.

Shikamaru signaled for Chouji to get to higher ground. Nodding and okay to Ino (who made a quick little genjutsu to disguise Chouji's exit), he stretched his shadow out to their foes.

Or tried to at least. It seemed to be gathering other shadows as it went, and he certainly wasn't trying to do that! They connected with the enemies shadows, but he didn't fell the click as the jutsu took affect.

Looking up, the deer-boy knew he was correct, the arguing group was still moving. Ino looked at him sideways, cocking an eyebrow as though asking what was up. Shikamaru shook his head in confusion as the enemy nin lunged forward again. Ino and Shikamaru bounced to a high branch on the tree, Shikamaru still trying to make his shadows work with him!

Finally, they seem to obey, the enemy froze. Ino made the Shintenshin hand sign and delved into the body of the one who had the scroll hanging at their side. And missed as the nin, with very confused faces, stared swaying back and forth and all around. The blonde, getting back to her body, glared at her shadow teammate, who was staring horror struck at the swaying ninja. He wasn't moving.

Sweating with exertion, the deer boy tried again to reign in his jutsu, and failed again as the shadows broke away from their captives and out of the ground. The unfortunate nin squeaked as the shadowy darts pelted them.

Finally, team 10 gave in, and both teams yelled "Retreat!" and took off in opposite directions.

-:- -:- -:-

_"To pass, get to the tower in the center of the forest. You must have both scrolls and all of your team."_

_This is so not helping me to get any better..._ Sasuke thought as he and his teammates sped through the forest in their disguises. They had been in here for at least half a day with no sign of anyone. They had to be avoiding him, it was the only possibility. No one in this damn village wanted him to improve, even if they were from foreign villages and countries.

But Shikamaru had promised to meet up with them (somehow dragging his team) and he wouldn't be avoiding them.

Then it must be a genjutsu. He sucked at recognizing those, so-

"It's not a genjutsu, Shika-kun." Haku said from his left. The pretty boy had seen his face and interpreted that he was getting worried. Idiot! He was letting people get close to him. They were just supposed to train him, that's it. Nothing more.

Sure as hell didn't stop _them_. He glared at Haku, who gave him a look of utter surprise for some strange reason. Then the ice nin turned to face the front again, a slight smile on his face.

They came to clearing very quickly, and decided to set up camp there. There was a stream near, so they wouldn't have to squander their own resources. No wind made it through the trees that could carry off their scent. Perfect rest stop.

Unfortunately, others thought so too. A fresh (well, as fresh as them, only a half day in and no fights, yet) team of rain nin came in, catching them by surprise. The fight started quickly, Gaara leaping from the water (where he had been trying to catch fish) and onto clouds of sand that had gathered, picking his target and attacking. Sasuke and Naruto vanished in a flash appearing behind the same boy and giving him a double back fist to the head. He collapsed with a sickening crunch in a heap and neither had anytime to worry whether they'd killed him as their kunoichi attacked in a fury. She had the both backed against the side huge tree before either boy had grasped the situation enough to retaliate. Haku caught her from behind, lodging a senbon in her vitals easily. Quiet again, Gaara hopped down and went after the fish. Haku helped Naruto clear up and searched the bodies. Sasuke cleared up the camp as someone could have heard even the thirty second near-silent ninja scuffle. They had to move out.

-:- -:- -:-

_"This is the Forest of Death. You may not come out of this one alive, so sign that slip. It explains that Konoha is not responsible for any fatalities that may happen to you. You may only take this test in return for that signed sheet."_

Sakura shuddered, thinking back to the words of the woman. She was scary all on her own, really. Worse than the battle scarred Ibiki. Kankuro looked over at her and attempted to comfort her with a smile. Have you ever had what looked like a depraved clown-slash-tribal warrior smile at you? The pink haired girl didn't find it all that comforting, but she knew he meant well.

"Calm down, Sakura. We could take just about anyone in this forest. They don't know what's gonna hit 'em." Sakura and Temari both snorted in amusement as the kabuki-painted boy made an exaggerated gesture and missed the next branch. Temari looked at him oddly afterwards, she knew he was skilled enough not to do that, at least. Was he trying to cheer their other teammate up? He wasn't just using her to _reveal everything _and get them all in a shit load of trouble?! The fan welding girl turned back away from her brother in a huff.

Temari shook her head, then shot to the left, signaling for her team to shut it. (Yes, shut it.) There are many hand signals in the ninja world, some more rude than others. It is, however, recommended that you use the more polite ones when on joint missions with nin from other villages, or when with nin that are stronger than you and are known for eating those they dislike. However, this was not the case with Temari as she knew that she was just as powerful as those around her, and wouldn't give a damn if the remark was to someone more powerful, anyway.

Kankuro and Sakura followed her quietly, sneaking up on an unsuspecting group of older genin. From the hitai-ate that could be seen, they were from Cloud. Hiding in the nearby trees, Sakura started up a genjutsu as Kankuro launched his puppet into the group. Just to worsen the initial damage, Temari sent a blast from her fan before helping Sakura by supplying her with chakra. After getting down the initial attack, both the sand nin had been helping their pink haired teammate with her stamina and reserves in case of a long winded fight, but she still wasn't quite ready.

The Cloud nin jumped in surprise as five or six air-blades flew at them, each shattering the ground. They were immediately succeeded by at least fifteen very frightening multi-armed... things, with too many eyes. The cloud nin to the far left lunged at one, hoping to stop it from reaching, and fell right through. He spun in surprise as it collided with the ground and caused a huge explosion. Several others fell short and blew up as well, lowering visibility, and showering them with debris. The nin that stared in the middle decided it had to be a genjutsu coupled with kunai and explosion tags. He spun to his closest teammate only to fall as she cut him down where he stood. Suddenly she shrieked, leaning down to check on him. He leapt up and attacked her, aiming for her throat, then suddenly stopping just before he hit her. Another puppet landed nearby and blew up. They could see their last teammate fall as a puppet that didn't blow up, slashed his chest and hit head at the same time. Four arms are better than two, apparently.

Distracted, they fell as Temari and Sakura hopped out of their tree and dealt their own decisive blows.

Kankuro came down soon after, searching the fallen nin for their scrolls. Finding it, they replaced nothing, retrieved their stuff (looted the Cloud team), and left.

-:- -:- -:-

A sand team stumbled through the woods tiredly. They had no idea where they were going anymore. They could be heading back out of the arena for all they knew!

The held the Ten scroll, and had been in three fights already. The three of them had beaten one of the teams, but it had already lost their scroll. The other two ended in draws in which both sides fled to avoid further tiring conflict. So far they hadn't gained any scrolls. This whole test thing was turning out to be a real drag. First they had been recruited to aid in _invading _the godforsaken place (Why? They will never know. This place sucked), next, after all that planning, it had been canceled. Yeah, canceled. So now they had to stand the stupid exam, because the stupid Oto leader had thrown a hissy fit and canceled!

And now this. The exams couldn't possibly get any worse.

Then a barrage of kunai shot towards them, causing many, although superficial, wounds on all three of them. Their kunoichi shrieked as a large boulder rolled toward them, and everyone leapt out of the way. It caused a huge trench in the ground, and on of the sand nin tripped into it, knocking his head painfully on a rock, he clambered out as fast as he could.

Suddenly, the other of the two boys slipped on a tripwire and went sprawling face forward. There was a terrifying yell from somewhere up in the trees and suddenly the shadows everywhere started to move of their own accord. The kunoichi stopped running and lifted her kodachi from her back. She faced the one guy who had fallen into the trench, but had come out again (speaking of which, the other guy hadn't gotten up again, did he manage to knock himself out?) and slashed at him. Her movements were fast and dangerous and the shadows were pulling out of the ground and tripping him up. There was a loud rumbling from behind them and the large boulder returned, heading right at the pair of them.

Again.

The one sane (in his own opinion) ninja left leapt out of the way as the thing hit his teammate.

"K'so! are you okay?" he yelled back to her.

She didn't move.

There was another horrible shriek from the trees then, suddenly, everything was black. His last fleeting thoughts pondered why such skilled nin were still genin...

-:- -:- -:-

Team ten waited patiently outside of the tower. This was the best choice they had. Although they had been training all week, they still weren't a spectacular group.

So they would use ambush. They would wait patiently for some unsuspecting (and probably tired) team to pass by, then take their scroll. All they had to do after that was run inside the tower. No problems, they wouldn't even have to fight all of them, if they didn't want to! Unfortunately, most of the universe knows what happens to those best laid plans o' mice and men.

The team all turned toward a patch of the woods as they heard the sound of people crashing through it. Shikamaru signaled Chouji to get in position and for Ino to check how tired they looked. It was just their luck, they were a couple of sand genin, and they were _completely _exhausted.

Ino came running back, suddenly flying through the air as she accidentally tripped one of their traps. Her momentum carried her out of the way, and the barrage of kunai instead peppered the unfortunate team below. Ino giggled weakly at her luck and Shikamaru just raised an eyebrow at her. They looked down below again to see that the team was for the most part unharmed. Shikamaru rang a tiny bell, the signal for Chouji to run them all over. Most would say that this was a foolish signal, as the other team may have the ability to hear the bell as well. However, the sound was a piercingly high frequency that Chouji was using a small device (resembling a watch) to pick it up, as he couldn't hear it himself. The most ingenious part of this was that if you were unfortunate enough to be able to hear such a thing, it would likely cause extreme pain, and a nasty hangover resembling head ach for a couple days afterward.

It is recommended not to use this signal when working with an Inuzuka, or an Aburame, or a clan with similar abilities, as they may never forgive you.

The rumbling was toned down for the most part, so the team shouldn't have noticed, but that goddamn kunoichi turned around and screeched! They all managed to get out of the way. Ino snickered however, when one of the boys tumbled back into the tracks.

Then she frowned in concentration, setting herself up for the Shintenshin no jutsu, looking at Shikamaru pointedly to tell him to paralyze one of them. He quickly performed the seals for the shadow bind... but nothing happened. His jutsu were acting up again. He turned toward Ino, but she had already left her body and all he could do was catch her. The deer boy looked down at her target. She might actually be able to catch him. Then, he tripped. On _their _trap. Shikamaru groaned, starting to think that maybe they shouldn't have set quite so many up.

Ino quickly returned to her body and immediately shrieked in anger. Her teammate, being right next to her, looked at her reproachfully as his ear drums were brutally murdered.

All of a sudden, Shikamaru could feel chakra leaving his body in a lurch. He looked down to see the shadows flying everywhere, and scaring the sand team even more. One particularly nasty one whacked the fallen boy on the head, knocking out quite effectively. Shikamaru groaned, and tried to cancel the jutsu. Ino looked at _him _oddly this time, before just shaking her head and giving her Shintenshin another try. This time aiming for the other guy. He moved, ducking down quick to check on his fallen comrade. The blonde girl over shot and hit the kunoichi as he rose again.

_'Fine, whatever...'_ she thought, settling in the new body. _'I'll just use her, then. Girls are better anyway.'_

She quickly tried to remember what the girl had for weapons, then pulled her kodachi of her back. She leapt forward, attacking the last teammate. He fell back, tripping over the roots and shadow tendrils that Shikamaru had yet to gain control of. He was barely looking at her anymore as Ino swung clumsily(but accurately) with the unfamiliar weapon.

Then, Chouji came back! Yay Chouji! He rumbled loudly from the place where he had exited last time, at the moment coming straight for the back of the last boy. The sand nin spun around upon hearing the noise and his eyes widened. He rolled out of the way, Chouji missing him again. Instead he hit Ino, right on. Flattening her poor temporary body into the ground and causing the girl to depart instantly. Up in the tree, she yelled again, expressing wordless anger at her teammates.

Shikamaru looked down from the tree again, rubbing his abused ear. The last one was rushing at the girl as Chouji vanished into the forest again. Sighing about troublesome everythings, he jumped down from the tree. The shadows swarming all over the ground calmed at his approach.

He glared at them.

Walking calmly behind the distracted sand nin, Shikamaru raised a kunai in the air, bringing down the blunt end on the genin's temple. He fell over unconscious and Shikamaru searched him for the scroll. Finding it, finally, he whistled for Chouji and the three members of team Ten made their _very _pissed way over to the tower.

-:- -:- -:-

Zaku looked in surprise from the camp he was helping to set up as he felt an unfamiliar presence. Kunai, shuriken, senbon, knives, sai, daggers and a hatchet flew at him and his team from all angles, forcing the tired team to move quickly to avoid being skewered. They could not avoid all the injuries. Dosu clutched his arm in pain, the thing hanging bloody and useless.

A gust of wind blew by and a green blur raced past Kin, the kunoichi barely dodging. Zaku continued to dodge the weapons coming from everywhere and nowhere to the best of his ability. They were focusing solely on him, now.

The group felt a blast of chakra and Dosu leapt back as Neji attacked him head on with Jyuuken. Zaku, finally hitting a low point in the weapons, aimed at Lee and blew him from his teammate. He lunged forward to attack but Lee was too fast, disappearing and leaving a nice new sandal print on the back of Zaku's shirt.

Kin vanished.

Zaku ran after and tried to continue the fight, but a long chain wrapped around him and yanked him forcefully into the foliage. It was just his luck, Tenten attacked him.

Dosu falls to his knees, gasping for air. Most of his Tenketsu are sealed despite his attempts to dodge. Neji smashes his head into the ground with a lazy kick, leaving the boy unconscious, or dead. He didn't care which. It was his own fault for trying to defy fate and become chuunin.

"I'll wait for you at point C." He said in a bored drawl, vanishing into the trees. Kin flew out of the bushes, barely landing in a half crouched stance, Lee close behind. She groaned to herself as the boy continued to rant to her. Something about Youth, the powers of Youth, not wanting to fight her, youth, more about not wanting to hurt her, valor, youth... and-

She can't take this idiot anymore. The sound nin gleefully sends a speedy senbon and the face of the talking boy. He cocks his head to the side lightly, dodging the weapon.

"That was an unyouthful sneak attack." he said with a bit of a pout. Suddenly he is beside her and dispatches her easily with a blow to the neck.

"GYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" Zaku ran out of the bushes, shrieking and into another patch, still shrieking. He was clutching his crotch and tears were streaming down his face. Tenten watched him leave with a hint of amusement from the trees.

"Lee! Let's go meet Neji. Do you have the scroll?"

The green boy salutes enthusiastically. "Yosh! I do, teammate Tenten! Let us go meet Rival Neji!"

Tenten twitched, a fake smile glued to her face. "Err... yeah. You know, Lee, it's unyouthful to copy everything Gai-sensei does all the time..."

"It is?" Lee said, pouting in confusion.

"...Yeah! It is." she assured.

-:- -:- -:-

Hinata sat up from inspecting their victim. The unfortunate team had fallen quickly under the skilled Kurenai-trained shinobi. She was holding out a scroll, not unlike the one that they had started with, smiling slightly.

"It is the right one." She said softly. Kiba hooted and ran over to help her tie up the enemy, lest they want revenge. Or at least their scroll back.

"Yosh!" Kiba and Hinata spun in surprise to face their third teammate. Who was looking away innocently with a slight blush on his cheeks.

"Why do you look this way? I did nothing." Shino mumbled.

Kiba shook his head in amazement, a half smile stuck on his face. "If you say so, man."

Hinata just blinked him, then looked around. "We have retrieved our second scroll. We must make our way to the tower."

"Yeah! Then we can win this whole thing and go home Chuunin!" their hyper member grinned happily at his teammates.

"We must first find a place to make camp, and rest." Shino ordered.

"But-but!"

"We are not close enough to make it to the tower today, Kiba-kun." Hinata said, sounding slightly guilty.

The dog boy frowned, then grinned. Shino and Hinata looked at each other, a bit worried.

"Okay! The first person back with the best sleeping den is the best ever!" he yelled, then took off into the forest. His teammates sighed at his hyperactivity just after a fight, but follow suit. They were certain, however, that nothing was supposed to have that much energy.

-:- -:- -:-

The two grass nin stepped back quickly to avoid getting caught in their master's fury.

"Kuu kuu kuu..." the last remaining nin laughed as he stepped forward to face the three now very nervous mist nin. They tensed, then the first lunged. Orochimaru easily knocks him to the side with one hand. He looked on ahead as the other two split up and send kunai at him from both sides. He vanished in a puff of smoke, leaving behind a log as the weapons hit. The disguised ninja appeared behind one of the mist nin, who made it to a tree, and pushed him on to the first one that attacked the snake sannin.

"Kuu kuu kuu!" he laughed again. Quickly he dumped the last of the group on top of the pile. The three scramble to right themselves just in time for a huge snake to erupt from the ground where they were, its deadly mouth snapping shut around a load of dirt. The air started to tinge purple and the unfortunate team felt it grow heavy around them.

"KYAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!" The other two spin to their teammate as he screams. They back away in horror as snakes start to slither up his body. Then they ran to him to help, but Orochimaru appeared in front of them.

"Kuu kuu kuu kuu kuu." They stepped back again, trying to keep their distance from the terrifying nin, despite their teammates screams. The two able nin start a joint jutsu, attempting to gain favor by summoning a mist. The heavy purple aura quickly stomped it out.

Glowing yellow eyes out of nowhere were to only warning before the huge snake lunged and bit one of the mist nib's head not-so-clean off. Blood sprayed the other. Unconsciously screaming, he fled to his other teammate, to free him from the snakes. He was splattered with the blood as another far too large snake erupts from nowhere and crushes the nin in its mouth. He spun again and saw Orochimaru looking at him, and vicious smile in place.

"No! No! Please! Leave me alone! Here! Scroll- you can have-"he pulled it out of his bag and screamed again as his arm was ripped off by the man's tongue. The scroll was now in the snake nin's possession.

"No! Help ME! HELP! He-" Orochimaru just laughed and sliced him in half, the last of the nin's terrified pleading coming out in a blood strangled gurgle.

"Kuu kuu kuu kuu kuu."

Eyes wide in terror behind his glasses at the macabre massacre he had just witnessed, Shino fled back to the designated meeting place early.

-:- -:- -:-

The second test was finally over, and the remnants stood thus in front of the Hokage. All standing in a row were only Sasuke (as Shikaeshi), Naruto (as Arashi), Gaara (as their pet Suishu-shu), Haku (as Tane), Sakura, Temari, Kankuro (All looking very proud to have made it, though Kankuro was shooting worried looks at Orochimaru), Shikamaru, Ino, Chouji (still looking read to murder anyone that came near them, despite their current skill level.), Neji, Lee, Tenten, Orochimaru (not that anyone knew it was him), his two Grass teammates, Hinata, Shino, Kiba, (all three of which were looking disturbed at Orochimaru, who was ignoring it), three tough looking Stone nin, two skittish cloud nin and their other teammate who was currently glaring at them, and three Mist nin of very little importance.

"Before we continue," the Hokage began, "I must ask those that feel they cannot continue to forfeit."

The Konoha nin watched as two of the Stone nin reluctantly raised their hands. Now that they got a better look, all three were rather battered, no matter how powerful looking. The two skittish looking Cloud nin also left, earning a disgusted look from their teammate. None of the Kiri nin forfeited, and none of the Konoha nin did.

Four people sighed in relief as Orochimaru, smirking to himself, forfeited as well.

The Hokage looked on proudly at the remaining group, ignoring the village differences for the moment to praise them all on their success as so far. He went on to explain what the third and final test was. He made sure that they understood why they were taking the exams, and why it was and inter-village effort.

"Make it clear to yourselves. This is not just to improve relations.

"This is a substitute for war."

He looked seriously at the attentive young nin, his grandfatherly smile gone.

"Now, as there are so many of you, we will be holding a preliminary match right now. This man," He gestured to a jounin who looked like he was about to collapse where he stood. "Will be the proctor of this exam." He bowed to them and left to the Kage box. Lucky Kages, they get the good seats for only half price.

Hayate bowed to the group and wandered, coughing to the middle of the ring. "Tane of Mist versus Gyaku of Stone"

Both males walked in the ring calmly, and bounced back to the edges as Hayate gave the signal to begin. It was only after the Stone nin started yelling and running around in circles that the watching crowd, and Haku, realized that Gaara had come with him. He was, at the moment, plastered over the poor boy's face and scratching like it was the only thing left to do.

Laughing quietly to himself, Haku easily snuck up on him and knocked him out with a clean blow to the neck. No need to be fancy in the Prelims.

-:- -:- -:-

Tenten growled audibly as the chakra strings latched onto the sword now. She wasn't letting go, damn it! The weapons mistress smirked to herself as she saw Kankuro stumble forward a couple steps as she yanked back on her weapon. He glared at her, yanking his hands away again and taking her with them. Frowning, Tenten, yanked back again, the boy forced to take a step forward again. It went back and forth like that for several minutes, neither willing to let go and dukeing it out more like a pair of three year old over a stuffeded than well trained genin.

"K'so!" Kankuro glowered at her, "Leggo, damn it!" he pulled on the chakra strings again, hard.

"Nope." She retorted calmly, landing smoothly and yanking back just as hard.

"Fine" the black dressed Suna genin muttered, attaching all the strings to one hand. He held out the other one and twitched it oddly; odder than usual. Tenten stood prepared, waiting for the rather beat up puppet to move again. It didn't. Instead the ground beneath her shuddered, an entire concrete block trying to free itself from the ground. The genin kunoichi looked back at Kankuro with amazement, and saw that he was using both hands on it now, this was going to be all or nothing.

"Fine." she said herself, digging in her pocket to grab another summon scroll. But it was too late. She dove off of the heavy block to keep from being flung around. Turning the oriental dressed girl saw it heading straight toward her at high speeds. Tenten leapt over it, ducking again as it came back. Then she collapsed as another block hit her from behind.

That was why he was using two hands.

She heard an odd snap in one of her legs and knew something was broken. Ignoring the pain anyway, Tenten tried to rise again, only to find the concrete block hovering above her.

Kankuro was sweating heavily, beads dripping of his face to the ground. The stupid things weighed a ton and he had to move them fast enough to keep up with the little witch. "Give up!" he yelled to her, trying to keep control over the stone over her head. He saw her look at it, then him, than back at it again. Finally she shrugged .

"Aright. You win, this time. I don't feel like being crushed because you run out of chakra."

Kankuro smirked at her, now _that _was dignity. "Smart choice." he moved the block just barely out of her range before dropping it.

"Winner: Kankuro!" Hayate called, raising an arm in the boy's direction. Tenten rubbed her head, embarrassed and tried to get up from the ground. Unable to do so, she collapsed back down. Her teammate, Lee, leapt down from the stands and helped her to the hospital area set up for them. He looked back behind them to see that the other boy had fallen too, and handed Tenten off to Neji. Jogging high spiritedly back to the arena, he grabbed an unconscious Kankuro and slung him over his shoulder. Tenten may have been beaten, but it sure wasn't easy!

"Next: Kiri no Shikaeshi v. Kiri no Bonbon!"

Both boys jumped into the ring, facing each other as they waited for the announcer to designate the beginning. The other mist nin, Bonbon, looked at Sasuke nervously. He knew about their team, and boy would he be in trouble if he fought any of them. Maybe this one would go easy on him?

Sasuke's eyes narrowed at Hayate yelled go. He slid back into an offensive Taijutsu stance. No, this kid would not be going easy on him.

"H-hey." he tried, hoping to gain sympathy. "This is your first time in the exams, too, right?" Sasuke raised an eyebrow, his paleish face still impassive.

"N-never mind." The boy looked away, feeling a growing annoyance, centered on him, coupled with an underlying want to fight. No, this was more like the Mizukage's; a _need _to fight. He wanted to beat him up, wonderful. Damn, why did the Mizukage's students all have to be so fight loving! It was just creepy.

Then again, the man like his fights as well.

Ah, screw it! "Hayate-san? I don't stand a chance, I forfeit." he said, looking nervously as the other boy out of the corner of his eye. He really hoped this wouldn't be taken out on him.

But Sasuke just eased out of his stance, shrugged and wandered back off stage.

Inside he was fuming at being cheated out of yet another fight.

-:- -:- -:-

Neji walked into the ring next, accompanied by one of the Grass nin that were with Orochimaru (not that anyone knew it was him). Both faced each other, giving of the same looks of contempt.

Coughing, Hayate brought his arm down in the signal to begin. Both jumped back, falling into their separate fighting stances. Almost at the same time, the two lunged at each other, up on the stands, several ninja muttered about the Hyuuga having finally met a twin of his own.

Strangely enough, the Grass nin seemed to be muttering the same about his own teammate.

On the raised part of the floor that was the arena (disregarding the two concrete blocks that raised the floor even more, and missing places that were now the same height as the outside of the arena), the battle was far from matched, twins in attitude they may be, but the Grass nin was no match for the Jyuuken genius. At first he had tried to block the attacks, losing precious mobility in return for realizing the extent of the attack. Now, unable to dodge as well as usual, the genin was falling fast.

"Hyuuga Neji is the winner." Hayate finally announced as the other genin finally collapsed. The pompous boy swept of the stage with a mutter about fate and losers.

-:- -:- -:-

Lee bounced happily to the center of the ring as the Jounin Procter called his, and some mist nin's names.

"Oh, how wonderful this will be!" he yelled to his very unfortunate opponent. "We shall have most youthful fight!"

The mist nin twitched impatiently. "Alright, be-"

"And we shall prove to the crowd the powers of Youth! Gai-sensei will be so proud!" The hyperactive genin interrupted. "It will be the dawning of a new Youthful decade! The world will see the powers of Youth!"

Hayate coughed, "Um, how nice...? Now, b-"

"Yosh! It _is _nice! And the newest Youthful generation will grow up to the power of Youth, and grow strong under the watchful eyes of Youth!" Hayate was starting to wonder if Gai's eccentricity was really a cult following for the as of yet unknown God of Youth.

"Yosh! That is it Lee! Show them your YOUTHFULNESS!" Gai howled from the stands. The three Jounin near him backed away quickly. The proctor decided that he must be correct.

"Gai-sensei!" Lee called from the arena.

"Lee!" his sensei bellowed from the stands.

"Shut UP!" the pissed mist genin screeched from right beside the very unlucky Jounin. He lunged forward, delighted to rip up the boy's throat.

But Lee wasn't there anymore. Confused the genin searched around him, finally finding the green clad boy standing easily behind him, and frowning.

"That was very unYouthful." he said reproachfully. "I shall teach you the true meaning of Youth!" Lee disappear again, reappearing for just a moment on the mist nin's side and scored a glancing, if painful, hit on him, before vanishing again. The mist nin spun around in surprise, missing the boy. This time on his other side, Lee appeared and attacked again. Again, the mist nin was just a moment too slow to catch a glimpse of the fast paced ninja.

After what seemed like ages of this, (the crown of peers had decided that Lee was an incredibly patient individual, even if he did worship some foreign god) the mist genin collapsed to the ground in a heap. The minor, although painful, injuries having added up.

"Winner: Lee." Hayate coughed, muttering something along the line of 'Hadn't said 'go'. Neither of them should have passed...'.

Next up was Shino and Chouji. Both stepped into the ring and bowed politely to the proctor. He nodded back. They turned to each other and politely greeted each other, although neither bowed and took their eyes off the other.

Hayate looked between the two in mild shock. 'Was there actually a fight where the two fighting didn't hate each other's guts?!' Shaking his head to clear it, he brought down his arm in a swipe to signal the fight starting. "Begin!"

Chouji leapt back to distance himself from his enemy, and to plan an attack, as per normal ninja procedure. To his surprise, however, Shino leapt forward with him as he leapt back. Before he could react, the boy had rushed past him. He now stood behind him, with a satisfied smirk on his face. 'Huh?' Chouji though. Shino had always struck him as a pretty emotionless guy. As had most Aburame, really.

Wait, was he showing off? Chouji frown and bent down in a fighting stance favored by the Akamichi clan. Shino spread his arms wide, preparing his own attack. A faint look of pleasure crossed his face as swarms of insects flew out of his sleeves at the pleasantly plump boy. He jump back and began to dodge and knock down some of the faster bugs. A few still made it on him and more would, but the insect user still looked frustrated.

"Stay still." he ordered.

"No!" Chouji said, scandalized.

"Why not?" Shino cocked his head to the side and seemed genuinely confused. Up in the stands, his team was looking at him with concern, Shino did not act like this!

Sucking in air, Chouji bellowed. "I don't want to lose!" He grew in size, his whole body inflating. "Baika no jutsu!"

Shino watched as the now massive boy rolled toward him at frightening speeds. The ninja from the audience yelled at the once-stoic boy to move. Hayate was about to call the match of when he noticed something. Just as the boy was about to hit him, he started to deflate rapidly, until he was just in front of his opponent, and normal sized again.

"Oooo, dizzy..." Chouji mumbled before collapsing from chakra depletion, right on top of the other boy. Shino's eyes went wide behind his glasses. He held on to the boy as best he could and peppered him with questions that he didn't expect or want answered, while helping him stagger to his feet. Both stumbled off the arena, heading over to the medical room.

"Winner: Shino." Hayate said unhelpfully.

Shino ignored him.

Hayate coughed.

-:- -:- -:-

The next fight was... interesting to say the least. Jounin teachers would talk of it for ages to come. After Hayate called Kiba and one of the Cloud ninja into the ring, he tried to say begin, he really did.

"Hey. Mr.Jounin-dude? Can we stop this for a moment?" Kiba asked innocently.

The man froze, one hand still in the air. "Stop? Do you forfeit?"

"No, no! I just wanna postpone this a moment. Aka needs to go. Bad." the dog-boy emphasized, holding up his puppy for a moment, before setting him on the ground.

Hayate stared at the puppy, reminding the authoress disturbingly of L. "Go where?" he asked.

"Y'know, _go_."

Hayate frowned, then coughed. "He should have _gone _before the match." He turned to the other nin, who had been waiting impatiently, then back to Kiba. "Begin"

Kiba leapt back on instinct, slipping in to a defensive stance. He looked down apologetically of Akamaru, only to find the puppy had stayed where he was. He whined, and the dog-boy ran forward again, forgetting the fight in favor of him partner.

Seeing a breach in defense and an easy win, the cloud ninja lunged forward. Kiba, crouching in front of his puppy didn't notice. Just as the cloud nin was about to attack, the boy stood again, lifting his puppy a little awkwardly. Glancing up, he stared at the ninja just in front of him, about to attack him.

Suddenly, both were distracted by a thin stream of yellow liquid arching onto the cloud nin. They stared, then the genin started to scream as the fact that the dog had just peed on him sunk in. He ran around in a full circle, then off the arena and down the hall way, still screaming. Everyone stared at the spot where he disappeared in astonishment.

"Kiba wins...?" Hayate seemed to ask.

Kiba spun to face him, a look of horror on his face. "What?! No fight?! But- but, Aka doesn't have to go anymore!"

-:- -:- -:-

Kiba glommed his teammate as she made her way back to the stands. "That was sooo not fair!" he whined as he nuzzled her. She blushed and tried to persuade him off of her. Shino solved the problem quickly, by grabbing the smaller boy's collar and lifting him away. Unfortunately, the affectionate boy merely latched on to him, next.

"She may be harmed, Kiba." he said in annoyed voice. Kurenai nodded and stepped forward herself, checking over her student carefully.

"I'm very proud of you, Hinata." she said with a small smile on her face. "You handled that Mist village kunoichi very well." She grinned to herself, giving mental thumbs up. The girl had impressed them all by coming out on top and defeating the other girl. It had looked a bit rough at first but her little baby had pulled through.

And with absolutely no Jyuuken. She couldn't wait to brag to that stuck up pig that called himself her father. Ah, sweet revenge.

"You didn't use the cool chakra kunai, though!" Kiba said suddenly. He pouted at his teammate, as though it was personal blow that she hadn't.

"A-ah. Gomennasai, Kiba-kun. I forgot."

-:- -:- -:-

"Nara Shikamaru." Hayate called again, coughing in annoyance. The boy had not come into the ring with the grass ninja, and it seemed he wasn't going to show at all.

"Nara Sh-"

"Get in there, you lazy ass!" came a shriek from the stands. Everyone looked up or over to see a blonde genin throw her surprised teammate over the end of the balcony and into the ring. Thankfully he landed with little to no injury, disregarding the heavy blow to his pride.

The pony-tailed boy slumped to the center of the ring, looking more like he had to take his mother shopping for clothing and then pay for it.

Shikamaru glanced at the two already there, and nodded slightly. Hayate nodded back, while his opponent completely ignored him.

"Begin." The grass nin sprang back with impressive speed, Shikamaru looking like he was about to do the same. It startled the small crowd when he instead looked down in surprise. The followed his gaze when it turned to that of horror.

His shadow was racing toward the grass genin, and from the looks of it, it wasn't the deer boy making to that. Frowning, the genius stomped on it, a futile attempt to try and get it to slow. When that didn't work, (in fact, it seemed to worsen the situation, as the poor boy lost his shadow in a very Peter Pan-esque moment) he chased it and jumped down on it. Needless to say, this was a very undignified thing for a ninja to be doing. The boy seemed to have forgotten that he was in a fight, instead chasing his run away shadow across the arena while everyone stared.

"Stay STILL!" he yelled at it, tackling the inky black patch on the ground in frustration. Suddenly, he wished he hadn't as the form ripped out of the ground in a long tendril, which he was hanging on to. It seemed to look around the arena for a moment, as though taking in the sights. Its gaze lingered on the enemy, then came to a stop, 'facing' Shikamaru, who scooted backwards, letting go immediately. It seemed to take this as an invitation, and dove back into the ground, swarming after the unlucky Grass ninja. It merged quickly with his shadow, the leapt up, engulfing the male.

Eyes widened all around as the sound of muffed screaming came from inside. Finally, Shikamaru gathered the nerve to walk over carefully, ready to bolt at a milliseconds notice. "Stop, now...?" he asked tentatively.

The shadow vanished, receding back to its rightful place, attached to the Konoha genin's feet. Where it once was, the Grass nin sat blubbering like an infant. He looked up in undisguised terror as Shikamaru approached.

"P-please don't hurt me!" He screeched, his voice several decibels too high, and causing Hayate and Shikamaru to wince. He quickly ran to the Jounin, begging to be let go. Hayate nodded confused, and the foreign genin bolted.

"It seems Shikamaru wins." The boy didn't notice as he made his thoughtful way back to the stands.

The rest of the fights we fairly unnoticed after that. Sakura and Ino got into a minor, very personal argument, and fought hard until they knocked each other clean out. It was deemed a tie, and lucky that it had happened now, and not the finals. Near the end of it, both girls had gotten rather erratic, and kunai were not hitting their mark nearly so often.

It was rather fortunate that their audience was trained shinobi, and even then there were still some close calls.

The next fight was a fairly short one, as ninja fights were supposed to be, between Temari, from Suna, and Naruto, in disguise as Arashi.

Naruto won, hands down.

-:- -:- -:-

Kakashi froze as he heard the voices in the alley hissing to each other. They were talking about his student. Did they know that he wasn't dead? Shit.

"The brat seems to have told them that it was me. They, however, got the information wrong and thought he was describing Sharingan Kakashi."

And now he's come into the conversation as well. What were they saying though? Someone thought that he had done something?

What had he done? Or rather been framed for by the young man in the ally. Lifting his hitai-ate, the Jounin identified them as a relatively tall boy, with silver hair and glasses speaking to another man. This one, from what he could see had long black hair under a wide brimmed hat. He seemed to be pale and wore a strange mutilation of a priest's and a samurai's yukata, tied with a belt of thick purple rope. The Sharingan caught slivers of enraged purple chakra coming from him.

Shit.

Orochimaru.

"How did they find out about the seal you used?" Orochimaru growled.

The other shrugged. "Dunno, I know I did a good job of it. The Nara brat must have figured out how to tell them."

Nara? though Kakashi. Nara Shikamaru? The boy that had just been attacked before the test?

They thought he did it?!

"Are you sure that the Jounin think that he did it? Even the sensei? They were close, right?"

"Hai. Sarutobi Asuma, and Jiraiya are the only two that heard him. They seemed to have told Maito Gai. All of them think it was him."

Asuma thought it was him?!

_GAI _Thought it was him!?!

The silver haired Jounin pouted at the injustice under his ,mask and stalked away to have a talk with his 'teammates'. Some rival Gai was, blaming him... And Asuma just knew better. And _Jiraiya_! The Sannin had known him since he was younger... This was a conspiracy!

Shit, it _was _a conspiracy.

Kakashi groaned and jumped to as roof top to try and locate the closest... 'teammate'. Buncha traitors, all of them.

-:- -:- -:-

Kiba walked quietly into his house, about to head into the kitchen when he heard laughing. Drunk laughing. There were at least eight voices, all of them yelling or laughing and the dog boy definitely smelled liquor. A lot of it.

He peeked in the door, being very careful not to get hit by a stray flying beer bottle like the _last _time his Mom had a party. He could see his Mom there, along with the Jounin examiner from the second test, Anko. They were laughing raucously, both with very little clothing on and very large cups of some alcohol or another. Near them seemed to be... Kurenai-sensei! What was she doing there-

in just her bra and panties. Kiba blushed. She was giggling and snuggling up to what looked like a very drunk, very happy Asuma-sensei. He had an arm around her and was talking animatedly to an oldish looking man with long white hair and a nose piercing. Sitting with them was the super freaky older version of the spandexified boy that he had met in the Chuunin exams. Drunk. They were all drunk. There were three more Jounin (or maybe Chuunin) that he didn't know the name of, sitting in the circle on the floor of his kitchen.

Drinking. Damn, he hoped that there wouldn't be as much trouble as there was last time.

"An-hic-and we finely got the li'l bastard!" Asuma shouted, finally saying something clear. "Looked jus' like the des- des- how m'boy said!" Kiba's eyes widened, _man _they were plastered!

The old man nodded drunkenly, agreeing. "We did hafta say sorry ta Kashi-chan tho'... We thought was it him!" There was laughter all around at that statement.

"Sowizzee dead?" His mom asked leaning in. Asuma-sensei's smirk widened, and he nodded.

"I tol' 'is dad, y'know Shikaku? Yeah, an' we found da li'l runt righ' where Kashi-chan said!" Several of the group winced at the mention of the boy's dad being involved as well. Kiba shuddered as he saw his sensei run a finger along the bearded jounin's chest whispering in his ear.

Hana looked at her little brother peering through the cracked door as she came down the stairs. Grinning, she snuck up behind him to surprise the brat. Just as she was in position, he spun around in horror and ran right passed her and up the stairs. The older Inuzuka child pouted but followed him up.

"Oh, Kiba!" she sang. "What were you doing eavesdropping on Mom's party again? I though you learned your lesson the first time." Hana peeked into his room, to find him in the bathroom seeming to be trying to scrub his eyes right out. "Geez, what was going on in there, kiddo?"

Her kid brother looked up at her, his puppy expression mimicking that of his puppy's. "Hana! Kurenai-sensei was in there!" Hana sweat dropped.

"Oh. Don't-"

"Umm, Do you know why they were down there?" Kiba interrupted, suddenly distracted as the implications of the conversation finally caught up with him.

"There was a traitor in the village. Have you ever heard of Orochimaru?" Kiba shook his head, both settling on his bed. "God, Kiba-chan, pay attention is school, would you? Any way his was- is- a man who was doing very wrong things in the village. When everyone found out, he abandoned the village and became a missing nin. You know what that is right?" Kiba nodded enthusiastically, as though this was a thrilling bed time story. "Well, he was spotted in the village several times recently, and was just found out to be working with someone from this village." Hana's little brother's eyes widened almost comically. "Anyway, the traitor was to one that hurt one of your teammates, Nara Shika something."

"Shikamaru." Kiba corrected automatically. So that was the person? It was someone from leaf? The dog boy recalled Kurenai-sensei telling them that the Chuunin exams were very dangerous, even before they started. That one of their teammates, on a different team, if that made any sense, had already been hurt. She told them that they should, now more than ever, remember that the two people standing with them weren't the only ones on the team, and to protect your friends and keep them safe.

"He was one of the people who spotted Orochimaru, and apparently learned a lot of valuable information." Kiba nearly jumped as his sister startled him from his thoughts. "Are you paying attention? Good. Well, they boy had a seal on him that wouldn't let him say anything, so they had to get that off. But when they did, they found out that it was booby-trapped!" Hana laughed as Kiba gasped. "And then the boy, Shikamaru? Told them as quickly as he could the description of the person that attacked him. But then he forgot everything that had happened to him."

"Oh, no!" Kiba whined, leaning on his sister and waiting for her to continue.

"Uh, huh, but that's not the worst part. The description he gave... fit none other than Hatake Kakashi!" Kiba gasped again, looking up at Hana. "Well, this startled the Jounin, Asuma-san, but he had faith in his student, so he thought that it was possible. He and the legendary Sannin Jiraiya, stalked Kakashi for many days, until one day they were spotted by Kakashi's Eternal Rival, Maito Gai. He's the one in green down stairs." Kiba nodded, still looking fascinated. Hana couldn't help making it sound a bit fantastical.

"Well, he nearly blew their cover so they took him away and explained what happened. That's when Gai decided to join them as well, although he didn't think that it was Kakashi that did it." Kiba grinned, proud of this person who kept faith in his team. "But then, one day, Kakashi was walking and he heard the traitor and Orochimaru talking. They had found out that everyone thought that Kakashi was the one that hurt your friend, not the traitor himself!" her little brother gasped quietly again, snuggling into her arm a little more. Hana continued with a smile, one hand waving around as though demonstrating, while the other was petting her little brother and his puppy.

"Well, Kakashi felt very sad that his friends could ever believe that he would hurt a Konoha genin, so he left to tell them the truth. Asuma and Jiraiya were very ashamed of themselves and apologized immediately. Then Asuma left to tell your friend's father that they had found out who had hurt his son." Kiba grinned again, bouncing a little in excitement before settling against his sister again, out of energy.

"So they both left to find the little traitor, and they made him admit what he had done." Hana looked down to see that he otouto's eyes were shutting. "Then they killed him, as was the code of the village. That's why you should never be a traitor. Now everything is all better." The younger dog user nodded sleepily, a small smile on his face. He muttered quietly, "I'm gunna protect _my _precious people too..." before finally drifting off to sleep, snuggled close to his sister.

-:- -:- -:-

"Did the Mizukage get taller?" Genma asked his old friend after catching up to him. It was a question that had been bothering him for quite some time. Well, ever since he had seen the man.

"You notice the weirdest things. Maybe they got a new one." Kakashi answered. He was a bit pissed that anyone would think he would attack a Konoha genin. He had students, damn it all!

"No, I would have found out." The younger man sounded genuinely stuck on this matter so he humored him, for now.

"Maybe it just happened." he guessed.

"They wouldn't just before an exam." Genma deadpanned. This was obvious as the genin wouldn't be up to top form having to get used to the idea of a different ruler. It also couldn't be that the old one had kicked the bucket, because then they would have heard, _and _there would be no Kiri genin here.

"Maybe he's wearing stilts." The silver haired Jounin joked. Hey, it made sense.

"Kakashi!"

"Heh heh. Don't worry about that. What you should worry about is I think I've met him... Maybe I'm related." He did think that he knew the man, and not just from an introduction on a mission. He also had a pretty bad feeling about him.

"Or maybe..." a voice from behind them spoke, startling both Jounin, "Maybe I'm someone who you feel likes to fight. Some who you met not long ago, and that you _cheated _out of a fight... "

Kakashi shivered invisibly as the tall (for he defiantly was!) man walked away. Genma stared at his friend, about to say something when they heard that the Mizukage seemed to be humming something.

_"To-tal slaugh-ter, To-tal slaugh-ter, I won't leave - a single man - a-live, La da la - la de die, Geno-cide, La da la - la de lod, An ocean - of blood, Let's be-gin The Killing - time... __**(1)**_"

Genma and Kakashi stared after him, eyes wide. Genma seemed to have an odd half smile stuck on his face and you could see the whites all around Kakashi's one visible eye. All words were forgotten for quite a bit.

-:- -:- -:-

They found, upon entering the site for the second half of the fights, that the arena was one; much larger. It was also not missing random blocks of concrete. The space was huge, and decorated. Several of the shinobi muttered that they didn't see the point, it was likely all going to be destroyed soon anyways. However, their used became obvious as the stands fill, influential politicians and business owners making their way to the more protected stands. The ninja were seated closest to the center, as they could defend themselves, and the non-shinobi resided in the middle, cheering everyone on.

The fights started quickly, the same proctor as before, Hayate, ushering them in. (For those who are curious, Baki, now lacking his quintessential contact, Kabuto, instead went to comfort his new found friend Kakashi. Both woke with rather severe hangovers, and very little memory of the previous night. It was decided, _when _they awoke to find themselves in a rather compromising position, in a _very _compromising location, that the incident would never be spoken of again.)

"Hyuuga Hinata versus Hyuuga Neji." Hayate called. The crowd stared in alarm, or at least the ninja portion did. This was going to be rough.

Hinata bowed deeply to her cousin, but he just sneered at her. "That is so pathetic, you should not bow to your enemy." he said, looking down at her.

"St-" Hayate began.

"A-ano sa, Neji-niisan. You are not my ene-"

"I am." He interrupted, scoffing. "Never think otherwise. Someday, I will teach you what it means to resign to you fate. You should learn now, and forfeit." Hinata tried to speak again, but the stuck up genin interrupted her once again. "In fact, why don't you give up trying to be a shinobi all together. You aren't cut out for it."

"That's enou-"

"You're too delicate, too kind, too _weak_." he spat. "You could not make it far, you would die on your first big mission, you will just have to listen to fate. Yours is elsewhere."

"Now, now why don't you just-" Hayate tried to speak quickly, he really did.

"Huh, you can't even be good at infiltration, and that doesn't even require fighting. You chakra reserves are too low too. You should just give into your fate, give you sister the title of heir. _She _is fated to it."

"Start, already!" Hayate finally shouted. This was followed by a loud thud as Hinata full out punched her cousin in the face. He lost his balance in surprise and fell to the ground. Blood was running from his nose like he was an overdosed pervert.

"Neji-niisan! You should just... just shut up! Fate is an idiot's excuse for the unknown and unwanted." She squeaked at him, her voice growing stronger with every word. "You have your problems, I accept that, and I am sorry for your losses. You did not deserve the loss of your father, and that seal. The curse is wrong and immoral, and I wish it had never existed. But, cease to blame them on me!" She was pacing now, Hayate sidestepped to avoid her trampling him. It seemed she was lost in her own world.

"You push away those who want to help and cling to you wretched _fate_." Hinata spat the word. "That is pathetic. I am not pathetic, I have moved on. I realize that I may have gone about things wrong before, but I strive to fix them." It seems important to note that as this speech continued, Kurenai stared dreamily down at her student, looking like she had found new love in her life. (Asuma glared jealously, looking back and forth between them, and held and ice pack to his head.) Shino had grabbed Kiba and was currently dancing the tango with him.

"But you, you are wallowing in your negative emotions, and you fate. They will not help you. They do not care for you. They want only to pull you into their abyss.

"You were born with talent, but you squander it. You refuse to help others like you, born with a chance, and deem them lesser than you. How many dreams have you crushed, Neji-niisan?" She glared at him, throwing her arms down in frustration.

Neji just sat there, staring ahead of him. His nose was still bleeding. Hayate leaned down in front of him, and waved a bored hand in front of his face. Nothing. He didn't react in the least. Nodding to himself, he hoisted the motionless boy over his shoulder, and carried him off, muttering something about 'catatonic' to some of other ninja.

It was a long while before any tried to remove the still ranting Hyuuga from the arena, and a still longer while after before they tried again after the first brutal failure.

-:- -:- -:-

The shinobi decided that they would need memory modification. Everything in that fight was not supposed to happen.

"Aburame Shino." he had called, same as always. "Arashi of Mist."

Both had come to the center quickly, nothing strange. The mist nin even exclaimed a delighted hello at the sight of the boy.

Then, to the amazement of all Aburame-knowledgeable ninja in the crowd, including the boy's own father, he shuffled back. Shino shuffled back away from the bright, silver haired boy. He looked uncomfortable, and insecure. It was showing on his face. Suddenly, the mist genin leaned in, he looked just a bit embarrassed.

"Uh, real sorry." he mumbled. Shino cocked his head at him, confused. "I didn't know that you would react so, well, big!"

The bug user frowned at him, still obviously confused. Arashi just looked away and mumbled something that sounded suspiciously like seal.

"Seal?" Shino repeated. Suddenly, as though something in his head clicked, he lunged at the other boy with alarming speed. His voice turned cold and threatening. "This is your fault?" Several of the senior ninja looked surprise at Kakashi, who looked a bit startled himself. The Aburame had sounded just like him, right then.

Shino latch on to his opponent, not relying on his kikai even once, and instead, grabbing Arashi, with one hand and pummeling every inch of him that he could reach with the other.

The mist nin wash pushed back ferociously, twice falling out of the ring, only to be yanked back in by the truculent boy. Finally, it seemed like the smaller boy had been defeated. Shino dragged the boy angrily to Hayate, who stepped back ever so slightly. The bruised and bloody boy was shoved in his face, Shino holding him by the hair. One of his eyes seemed to be swelling shut.

Next think people knew was there was a crash at the other end of the arena as the Aburame crashed painfully into the wall. A blur raced after him, smashing a knee painfully into his face and knocking the taller boy's head against the wall again. Hard. Naruto frowned worriedly as the boy slumped. He didn't mean to go so hard on him, but using the Kyuubi's chakra was the only way he could have won.

-:- -:- -:-

The crowd stared on in amazement. They were still not sure who had won.

Or what had happened.

Or anything really.

First, it was all fine and dandy. An unfair fight, consisting of the Inuzuka flunk, who had just barely passed the prelims, against the super-speed-and-power-cannon, Lee. That was where it all went wrong. Kiba was delighted to fight him, and even listened patiently to his speech.

They should have known there, that boy had no patience.

Then, impressed by this, Lee had told him that he would not hold back against him.

But he had! The damn fool... Like everyone else, he had known of the connection that the Inuzuka clan shared with their companions, but this... this.

They still didn't know who had won. Both had to be carried off, that was for sure.

-:- -:- -:-

Next, the fourth fight of the finals, was Shikaeshi of Mist against Kankuro of sand. The actual fight didn't last all that long. They had started by being called into the ring. Both boys curtly nodded to each other, never letting their eyes leave the other's face. Hayate, seeming glad fir a normal fight for once, called for them to begin.

And they fought, both seeming evenly matched, with a slight advantage to Sasuke, which was a bit muffled buy the use of Kankuro's puppets. Unfortunately for everyone, this merely lasted a few moments. Suddenly, a booming voice yelled something across the stadium. Something that struck fear into the hearts of Genjutsu users everywhere.

"KAI!" Sasuke felt a sickening lurch in his stomach as he felt the Genjutsu slip away. Kankuro froze in mid attack, staring at him. There was screeching from the stands, and quite a few of special Jounin even backed away from the furious pink haired girl.

"SASUKE!" This got through to most of the crowd, and suddenly, everyone was standing and shouting.

Then before anyone could react, a man was standing there, dressed in the Kazekage's clothing, yet his face was that of someone else entirely.

Orochimaru.

He grabbed Sasuke and yanked him forward, as Kankuro lunged at him, furious. The genin had worked too get his revenge for his father, (whether he liked him or not was something else entirely) and he wasn't just letting it go to hell.

"It's Orochimaru!" he yelled, to attract the attention of those still in shock. The puppet user flung his puppet, all accessories and blades sticking out dangerously, at the Sannin.

But it was too late; the man had sunk his fangs into the closed bit of his prey that he could reach, which happened to be his shoulder, as the boy was a survivalist with a mission, and not inclined to giving into random freaky old Kage impersonators. Especially when they wanted to _bite _him.

Sasuke's eyes went wide with the sudden pain and the shock, then he slumped over, unconscious. Orochimaru spun around to destroy the brat that dare hit him in the back, but found to his dismay, two very unfriendly faces.

The Hokage and the Mizukage had both leapt down to the defense of their very near joint subject, and common enemy. This was a very unsettling surprise, as Orochimaru recognized the Mizukage to be a very powerful (strangely enough, _missing_) nin that might actually mean he could die if they worked together. Then, as he felt his burden relieved from him, the snake Sannin spun to face several furious genin, in a growing crowd. The one that now held Sasuke was glaring blood and horrible fates at him, his shadow bubbling dangerously around him. Next to him stood both the boy who dared to attack him, looking like he would dare to do so again in the near future, and a large boy who looked to be getting larger by the second. They were joined quickly by two other mist ninja, and a bristling raccoon. Then two pissed as hell girls, and two very dangerous leaf Jounin.

This already large group was joined by more and more over protective ninja. Damn Konoha and its friendliness!

Dropping his plans for the moment, Orochimaru fled.

-:- -:- -:-**Owari**-:- -:- -:-

**A/N: You all hate me, don't you?**

**(1)** This is from Trigun. Sung by Vash. I love it, but _no me ownie_!

**(2)** oh, how tempting it was to write Ho ho ho Green Giant, or something along those lines...

**(3)** For those who don't know, akimbo means hands on hips.

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**Click click! You click me! Give give! Give me **_**review**_

**_OMG! Meep_**


	10. Part One

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**(A/N:) Read me! **The reviews are depressing me. ;.; Sorry if this is short compared to the last chapter, I don't know what's happening in this story any more. Do you think I should continue? Never mind, of course I'll continue. There's even a reason why this is so short! (At the bottom, if you wish.)

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**On the Wings of Revenge **

**By:** Zeida and Maria (Maria)

**Warnings:**Insanity, crack, violence, blood, gore, plotholes, randomness, lack of plot to begin with, language etc... Etc...

**Disclaimer:** I don't own it.

**Summary:** Zabuza finds Naruto after Haku, and takes him away. This is half crack nuttiness. Vengeful!Naruto. It's starting to look like a foursome to me but it's _not_? Just brother love? Gaara, Haku, Naruto and Sasuke...nuttiness. Shikamaru shows a lot too! Have I proved myself nuts yet? Inspired by my own nutty-ness.

**NOTICE!:** This one wants to hold a little contest! The prizes will be: A chapter dedication to you! and a (non-NC17, X, or R rated) Fan art drawing of your choice! (Yes, I CAN draw) Now, In this story, I seem to be being VERY nasty about/to Kabuto. He is very likely to die, really. But the truth is he is one of my favorite characters! Weird, eh? The only Character that I _can't _bash is Shino, actually. Someday, I will make a story that is nicer to the poor guy. But as for the contest: Me and Zeida were role playing once and we made Kabuto stalk(but was in LURVE with) a REALLY random character. Except in _Canon_, he was actually nice to said chara! I want you, loyal and sweet reviewers to try and Guess who it is! Guess! Go on, I dare you! You will NEVER guess! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! 

Tries:

"It can't be Naruto, because he was a real jerk to him later on. It can't be Kiba, because he knocked him out. It can't be Sakura, he never really interacted with her. It could be Hinata, but she never interacted with him. That leaves two options, both equally disturbing. Kimmimaro or Baki. Kimmimaro was cruelly manipulated by Kabuto, so that doesn't work either. So it has to be Baki. That's certainly random." by RobotPirateNinja

Anyway, this contest will end when someone guesses the right person. I will update announcing this no matter how much of mine chappie is done, so you are very likely to get one helluva weird chappie!

Thanks

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**ChApTeR TeN: You Got Some 'Splaining to Do (Part One)**

Sighing now that the sannin was gone, the closer ninja knelt down to have a look at the unconscious boy in Shikamaru's arms. He didn't seem to be very injured, but something had definitely knocked him out. recalling that the snake sannin had leaned in towards to boy right before the collapse, the deer boy decided that one of three things could have happened.

"He was either spat poison on, breathed poison on, or injected poison into." the deer boy said out loud. The easiest to check without the help of a medic nin was biting. Chouji carefully pulled off the pale boy's shirt. There were gasps from one side of the crowd, they had noticed the bite mark, still with minute droplets of blood running out. Then, there was a seal glowing on the boy's shoulder.

"What... the hell is that." Sakura ground out, still looking furious. The genin stared at it, most shaking their heads that, no they didn't recognize it, the rest verbalizing it. Akamaru whined, confused and upset by the negative energy emitting from it. The Hokage stared at it. That was a symbol that was present on the wreckage of some of the research scrolls that Orochimaru had left behind. Unable to take them with him, the wayward snake sannin had destroyed all of his works.

The jounin and Zabuza also leaned in, examining the mark. Anko, seeing it, gasped, and one hand shot unconsciously to cover her neck. Asuma looked concerned, knowing that it was evil, yet not what it was. He glanced up at the kunoichi behind him, and walked silently towards her.

"All right?" he asked in a whisper. The scantly dressed woman focused on him, surprised. "Do you know what it is?"

Anko looked down. "Yes, and no." she said sadly. She moved the collar of the jacket just slightly, so the other jounin could see the identical mark on her own flesh. "I don't know what it does, but it was this that knocked him out, and it is _his _mark…"

Asuma nodded. "Thank you…" Suddenly, a wave of thick, murderous aura swept over them all. Zabuza stood up straight, staring at the boy. Everyone still capable of fighting prepared themselves, as the furious missing nin growled deep in his throat.

"That bastard… I've seen that mark before, and several similar to it." Everyone stared at him.

"You've seen it?!" Shikamaru stood, leaving Sasuke to Chouji to care for. Gaara sat close by, making sure that no one else came anywhere close to the sleeping boy. "What is it? What is it meant to do? Will it harm him? How do you remove it? Is it a seal or a focus point?"

Zabuza stared, startled by the boy. "A-all I know, is that the… creatures that had it were given super strength, and speed. But they were turned in to monsters. All they wanted was to kill, even their bodies reflected the twisted desire. They were mutated, demonic." he looked around, noticing the incredulous looks of those who knew his identity. "No, seriously! Worse that me!"

Now, those who were not aware of the who the man actually was, were quite worried.

The Hokage turned to face the terrified crowds. "I am afraid that the Chuunin Exams are temporarily canceled. Please, if you will follow the ANBU guards, they will lead you to a safe haven were you may wait until the trouble has been disposed of. Depending on the damage, and the willingness of the competitors, the exams may be picked up from there. I apologize greatly for this disturbance."

At this, most of the nobility began to panic, the shinobi around them only barely containing a riot. The middle class, used to ninja and their problems, actually stayed fairly placid, making strained conversation to keep and children calm and following their designated ANBU out to the secret tunnels hidden throughout any self respecting ninja village.

Elsewhere, around the stadium and village, the Oto ninja learned of their leaders retreat. They panicked. Many of them breaking ranks and posts, and fleeing the village. Others felt that this would be a good time, during the chaos and all, to loot. The rest fell were they stood, efficient Konoha shinobi taking them out before they could decide what to do.

Still in the arena, the motley group decided on their actions. Carefully lifting his old student, Kakashi lead the way to the medical bay set up for the tournaments use. Temari, who had come down to help her brother, and Kankuro himself both froze as they heard yelling in the distance.

"Uh, we got to go for a bit…" the puppet user excused weakly, before running in a fixed direction towards the yelling. Temari followed quickly, shooting apologetic glances behind her.

In the sick bay, Sasuke lay unconscious on the bed, everyone else looking worriedly at him, and at the door where the Hokage had left ten minute before. Finally, he returned, followed by Kankuro.

The nurses and few medics that weren't on the field helping against the Oto ninja, hurried over to take care of the Suna boy. They had already patched everyone else up from the tournament fight, and done all they could for the Uchiha on the bed. Unfortunately, he still hadn't awoken.

"It seems that Orochimaru has fled." The Sandaime said, drawing everyone's attention. "He did not attack anyone, but it seems that he has purposely demolished anything and anyone in his path on his way out of the village. There is a rescue team on the scene, looking for survivors and assessing the damage." Zabuza, and his students looked away, this was useless information to them. Sakura looked worried, and was biting her lip.

"Hokage-sama?" she question. "Where is Temari? Why did you only bring back Kankuro?" At this, the painted boy looked thoroughly insulted.

"Me? Brought back her by someone else?!" Kankuro thumped a hand against his chest, indignant. "No, I just wanted to leave the rebellion crushing to Temari."

Elsewhere, in the meeting spot designated by the 'Kazekage' of Suna, a mass of shinobi looked at Temari in shock.

"He's… dead?" someone asked tentatively. Temari shot the shinobi a glare.

"Are you all deaf?" she proclaimed loudly. "My father, the average of our village, was killed some time ago by the leader of the new hidden village of Oto. Said leader has been impersonating out leader, and signed all the treaties with himself."

Many of the shinobi of Suna began to whisper together. "Is that why no one was ever allowed at the meetings?"

"Surely he could have used a bushin?"

"That would have been noticed by any self respecting high rank ninja. Anyone in our village would have noticed."

Temari looked appraisingly at the crowd. "So, what should we do to the insulting bastard that impersonated our Kage and thought he could get away with it?! Now that I think about it, their whole village!" She was answered by enraged shouts, the people of Suna furious that the sannin though he could get away with such a thing.

A little later, Temari also walked into the medic bay, lead there by a rather cowed Konoha ninja. In the room, the Hokage had just finished reciting the damage so far to his jounin, the genin listening in anyway.

Apparently, several jounin had come and gone, leaving their Kage with reports that he read to his other jounin. Out in the battle field, the Oto nin were being pushed back, at first it had been an equally matched fight, both sides confused at the sudden turn of events. Then, as the word of Orochimaru fleeing spread, the moral of the Konoha side grew, and Oto's shrank. They were now almost beaten out of the village, with the sudden arrival of Sauna ninja, who seemed to be furious, and dearly wanted to massacre to the unfortunate, but totally deserving, Sound.

That finished, the whole room lapsed into silence. The air was heavy with unasked, and awkward questions. Finally, the Hokage spoke.

"Could some one kindly explain why there seems to be a dead boy lying unconscious on one of the beds?" he asked pleasantly. Instantly, Naruto and Gaara, still disguised, broke with excused, each disregarding the other. When they realized that they contradicted each other, they froze. Then Haku broke in, his excuse unchallenged, but utterly absurd.

"We found the body and decided that he needed another chance because his life was too short and wrought with tragedy, so we used a special thing that was created by evil gods, but we didn't know it then, and brought him back. Except because it was evil god made, he was… never mind…" Blushing, although you couldn't se it, he clamped a hand to his mouth.

Zabuza, tiredly rubbed a temple. Alibis, that was what he would teach them. Alibis…

Silent until then, Shikamaru suddenly spoke up, drawing the Hokage's very startled attention. "We all thought he was dead! He fell into the river at Wave, and he was covered with weapons,. So it was only reasonable that he was dead. Everyone went to find him, except no one found a body." he looked around nervously, expecting to be contradicted. "When he arrived here, he didn't interact with anyone, so he obviously has no idea who we are. And obviously we didn't know he was here…" the deer boy trailed off at the disbelieving stare from his Kage.

"Shikamaru-san, please explain what you have to do with this?" he questioned, not unkindly.

"_Nothing_." Asuma suddenly interjected, a tiny note of anger in his voice, although undetected by any save the Hokage, Kakashi, and Kurenai. Kiba, oddly enough, picked it up as well.

The Hokage looked reproachfully at son, who turned away. The older man sighed "Why are there dangerous, no, _two _dangerous missing nin here pretending to be Kage?" he questioned.

Naruto, still looking like Arashi, waved his hand around in the air, rather violently. Gaara, on his shoulder, and Ino, on his other side, bounced away to avoid being brained. "Me! Pick me!" he yelled. Zabuza happily clamped a hand over the boy's mouth, holding him still with the other. "It's a long story, but to make things shorter, I'm not a phony, I'm the true Mizukage."

The elder Sarutobi smiled kindly. "I think we have time for a story. Please, start at the beginning."

Sighing, Zabuza told what he knew, he was helped long by his students. When there story was told, the group that had gone to Wave, to protect Tazuna, told there story, each of them taking turns as not everyone was everywhere. When they got to the point where the genin had been sent to Gatou, everyone turned o Shikamaru.

He looked away pointedly, mouth firmly shut. Smirking, Gaara filled in the rest of the story from there. "Sasuke killed Gatou, and left with us." squeaked the raccoon-lemur hybrid.

The room was silent, no one knowing what to say. Those who knew couldn't look the Hokage in the eye. Temari and Kankuro turned to Sakura, a look of deep respect in their eyes that startled her back a few steps. Kurenai looked at Asuma in confusion, her students looking at each other, then at Sasuke.

"Wait, Sasuke and Shikamaru are traitors?!" Kiba suddenly squeaked. The smoking jounin palmed his face in annoyance.

"No." he said, quite clearly. Kurenai sighed in relief. ?Kiba sighed to, a grin in place showing off his frightening canines.

"Oh, good, because Shika's too Shika to be killed" he nodded in emphasis. Shino swatted, Hinata, to her surprise and everyone else's, followed suit. Their teammate yelped, covering his head with his hands and ducking, his puppy barked his disapproval.

Ino and Sakura turned slowly to the pony tailed boy near them. "You… knew…?" they hiss, almost in unison. "You _knew _and you didn't _tell _us?!" The Nara stared at the both of them, thoroughly scared. He brought his hands up in a pacifying gesture, trying to calm them.

"I could have just found out my self!" he offered. Chouji sighed, folding his arms on the bed near Sasuke's head, and leaning on them. Behind him, Kiba stared at the Uchiha's sleeping face.

"Is he a precious person? Do I protect a precious Person's precious person?" the dog boy wondered out loud. No one around him seemed to notice. "To a degree." he decided suddenly. This, the Akamichi below him heard. He turned his head to the standing boy, questioningly. Kiba grinned reassuringly at the other, then sat down on the floor, leaning against the bed. Looking slightly confused, he began to sort of who he was supposed to protect, and who would try to kill him should he try.

Suddenly, Ino and Sakura were distracted as Naruto, as Arashi, threw an arm around Shino's shoulders. Glaring at the smaller boy, the bug user harshly stomped down his foot on the other's and jabbed his elbow back into the (normally) blond's gut. Everyone around them winced, knowing that an emotional Aburame probably wasn't the safest thing to deal with. Not to mention that this was the boy who fought against Shino in the finals, and was so vehemently attacked.

Stepping back Naruto rubbed his stomach, pouting. "Fine, I won't fix the stupid seal!" The taller boy turned slowly to face his face furious. The jinchuuriki took another step back, a strained grin on his face. "Erm, that is I just wanted to ask you to send a bug in Sasuke and tell us if there are problems." he amended.

The bug user frowned, looking back at the sleeping boy. "Why not use a medical jutsu, this is the purpose that they were designed for."

Naruto grinned. "Well, your bugs are sensitive, right? But the mark that that bastard left might be too. It can probably sense medic stuff, and probably Byakugan radiation too." at this, he pointed to the two Hyuuga present in the room. "But it wouldn't expect a bug, would it?"

Shino frowned, thoughtful. The adults of the room stared appraisingly at the genin for his cleverness. Zabuza grinned behind his wrappings, smug at their surprise, and proud of his student at the same time.

Gaara then hopped on Lee's shoulder, hoping for a better view. The boy in question, looked worriedly out of the side of his eye. Shikamaru, hearing that Shino might be able to do something, stared at him, pleading silently. Chouji, on the other side of the bed looked up as well, joining with the puppy dog eyes.

Zabuza looked at the Aburame with slight pity. He knew how had it was to resist that strange jutsu. Finally, the boy gave in, walking over to the bed and leaning over slightly, observing the sleeping Uchiha. Just a moment after award, Shino rose again, looking around at everyone watching him. Shyly, he backed up, looking for his usual escape route. (Kiba)

"Foreign chakra is traveling through his system from the mark. It's heading to brain fastest. It seems to be sensitive to medical jutsu and seals, but not Byakugan and I am not sure of extent of which it is sensitive of seals." he spoke up, finally gathering the courage.

Sandaime nodded at the information, then turned to Hinata. "Hinata-san, if you would, could you watch his chakra and tell us if anything changes." he requested. The Hyuuga girl blushed slightly and bowed.

"O-of course, Hokage-sama!" she stammered, and turned to Sasuke, activating her Byakugan. The Hokage turned to his son, who was still refusing to look at him.

"Asuma, could you please retrieve Jiraiya?" he asked. For a second, the smoking ninja didn't move, then he vanished. The Sandaime sighed, suddenly feeling very old.

It only took a few minutes for the jounin to return. He came this time through the front door, dragging the frog hermit by the ear. Upon seeing him, Shikamaru got his strange, unexplainable urge to make sure his shirt was on and his fly was zipped, and that neither were going to be in any other state any time soon. This was a very strange urge, mostly because he wasn't were pants that had a fly today.

Jiraiya was very pissed. The disbelieving brat that was his sensei's son had come back again, and interrupted his research! He was planning a new book and needed that, damn it! The man had said that there was another emergency that required his assistance.

He had said no. Obviously this wasn't accepted, which was why he was standing in the middle of a medic room surrounded by brats, with this ominous feeling in the air.

The sannin froze, turning to his sensei. "He was here." It wasn't a question. Time started moving again, and Jiraiya shot forward towards the bed, breaking free of Asuma with ease. He swore, seeing the mark and instantly started shooing everyone out.

No one was left in the room, the stood staring in the hallway at the door that had slammed shut in their faces. There was an odd shuffling from inside, then suddenly, the closest to the door, mostly genin, had to dive out of the way as an entire bed came pelting out. This happen a couple more times, this suddenly stopped. Counting the beds told the group that there were no more left in the room.

"That means that Sasuke has nothing to lie on…" Chouji muttered.

Hinata frowned at the doors, curious. Neji looked at her, till slightly nervous, but recovered. He brought his hands up in the Byakugan's seal, making sure it was within her sight. Looking at her, the younger Hyuuga's eyes widened. She nodded, and both activated their Byakugan.

The light of the chakra in the room was blinding. Both Hyuuga unconsciously deactivated their kekkei genkai, and stumbled back, those behind catching them. For a while after, neither could see through the glare left behind.

Frowning, Shino informed the group that his insect had also burned up before even being able to enter the room.

The jounin, and Kage sighed, and decide that it was better instead to relax and wait it out. Most of them sat themselves in the hallway, surrounding the room. Seemingly determined not to follow their example, Chouji and Shikamaru began to pace. Most of the other genin leaned themselves against the wall.

Glaring at the two restless ninja, Ino slipped over to Sakura, whispering in her ear. They move made their way over toward the last of team ten and grabbed them, forcing the two to sit. Ino stood guard over them for a moment, making sure that they would stay put. They did so grudgingly.

Ino spun around, looking for anyone else who dared to be fidgety around her. Locking on to her next target, the blonde grabbed Naruto (Arashi) and sat down, forcing him down next to her. He latched onto Haku who was pulled down as well until all three were seated. Gaara took this time to wrap himself around the base of Lee's neck, whimpering every now and then. Subconsciously, the Gai clone began to pet him.

-:- -:- -:- Owari -:- -:- -:-

A/N: Alright, since I wanna please my dear reviewers, I'm updating! Obviously! What I'm gonna do is write the chapter in bits, post all bit, then combine said bits. So, this is about a third to a half of the chapter. This okay with you guys? It means faster updates.

Anyway, reviews, flames, critiques, critisims, yadda-yaddas, ects all welcome! Humor me.

Queen of the MEEP


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